This is not right but I don't know how to change it

[HappyLandSpaceMan]

I have been in my current relationship for 6 years now. We have 2 dc.
He is not making me happy and his behaviour isn't right towards me. I do know that much. I don't want to be with him but I have no idea how to leave him. I need him to function, or that's how it feels anyway. I don't know how to make it all better.

Morning hope you are ok.

thinking of you, happy. keep going, keep strong, stay safe.

Hope you're better today, happy, and that it's sunny where you are. Keep fighting. You've done so well and your babies will thank you so much one day when they are bigger. Respect to you.

Morning Happy, we're all still here hand holding.

Hope you got some support last night

Hello HAPPY. Still here with you.x

Hi everyone
I came out this morning only just been able to post but I am with dc and I have put a deposit on a flat, it is ready to move in on the 5th. I feel tired of everything but I'm glad I am making progress with it all. Thank you all for your continued support, it really is a lifeline for me at the moment

Congrats on your flat, Happy. And thanks for coming to update us, was starting to worry! Did they treat you well in A & E? I'm sure you feel physically tired after a night in hospital, let alone the emotional tiredness of what you are going through. You're nearly there...your own place.

Happy does your childminder know what's going on? I'm hoping you have some real life support.

I am in awe of you though you are doing amazingly well and are so so brave.

I have told the CM he is not to have access to them/be able to pick them up but I don't think he even knows where the cm is. They weren't nice at the hospital but the psych has recommended a dose increase in a letter to my gp. I am going the dv officer tomorrow to give a statement.

I'm so glad you are OK, happy. And also that you are going to make a statement to dv officer-get it all documented.
Who stayed with the DC last night? Did they come with you to a&e ?

I got the cm to do an overnight for me because I really couldn't face having them with me, I might ask her to have them again tonight.

Oh, Happy, well done! I'm so relieved you did get medical help, and the psych's report may prove useful in months to come. You've got a flat!!! :D Maybe you're not in a frame of mind to feel excited about that - but it will come; maybe when you close the front door, with you and DC inside, and think "This is mine! This is safe."

Great news, too, that you're seeing the DV officer formally as well. It's not even a week since you thought you couldn't do any of this. You're so amazing.

Very pleased you are out and still feeling OK.
Make sure you tell the DV officer everything.
It's going to be tough having to recall everything but try not to leave anything out.
If your CM is happy to have them, then it might be good to get a bit of headspace for yourself for tonight.
Well done again and keep on, going on!

Well done Happy!
Sorry they didn't treat you to well in A & E depends who you get! As to how they treat you. The don't like you cutting yourself, as they know your harming yourself.

Great news about the flat, just think of you and your dc having happy times there once you get stable again.
Can't believe he doesn't know where the cm is ( good job he didn't have to take them then) but great now for you that he didn't peace of mind.
Brilliant you have a child minder who does overnight stays wow!
Have you explained to her, obviously not in great detail
Just think all the things you did on your own
Take the dc to child minder
Work full time
Pick them up
Make the tea, play with them and then put them to bed
All on your OWN
You can do this!

Remember happy with all increases in AD, you get heightened anxiety again until the dose as equalled out again.
Could you get any diazepam say 2mgs from dr to see you through the rough times for a while? Ask them

Wow! You really ARE making amazing progress. I am amazed at you. Your children are so lucky you are doing all this, protecting them from an abusive father. Please do keep the appointment with the DV officer, and give that person full details; you will need that to protect all of you. When they don't know everything, they don't give as much help or protection, so even though it will be hard for you, you really need to keep pushing through this... but only one hour at a time. You can do this!

oh yes! out of hosp, deposit on a flat, good childminder, and a job. you are an impressive woman.
well done!

V impressive, happy. You should be v v proud of yourself!
So glad you have a new flat to move into - it goes without saying that you shouldn't let ex know where you are living. I'm sure you will make it lovely and homely for your DC.
Don't forget that your ex should be paying child maintenance! You could get on to CSA

So glad you're okay Happy. Just keep plodding on love. You will get there.

I think he's outside the hotel

Oh dear op, have you left instructions with hotel staff not to let him in? Can you call the police?

I'm not good on these things, but I have seen how brave you have been. I'm amazed. I wish my mum had had your bravery and perhaps my life wouldn't have been so shit.

I'd call the police.... Xxx

Don't answer the door!!
If he keep ringing the room don't answer, call the police

What makes you think he's there?

If anything untoward's occurring, Happy, I hope the police are with you.

If you think he is there then call the police. Really! Call them!

Please keep yourself safe HAPPY. Don't worry about bothering people. they will be pleased to be bothered