DH said no more tattoos

[ICanSeeTheSun]

My vision is to turn my back into a canvas, I believe tattoo are art, so far I have 4 on my back.

I love them and it is a part of me.

eddielizzard

Jaysus, lighten up. We cant all strive to look like Barbara Cartland, Elizabeth Taylor and Joan Collins. I am realistic about my looks at 70, I know I will have wrinkles, and be saggy, it is not a taboo, it is part of human nature and growing old! My grandmas face was gorgeous to the very end, and equally my 78 year old mum.

I honestly dont see anything wrong in saying that if you have tattoed on clothes, you will look like you need ironing at 70. It is just the way it goes for all of us. We will be wrinkled, and saggy, and if we are not, I suspect numerous cosmetic operations, but that is fine too. Wrinkles, cosmetic surgery, tattoes, breast implants, we are who we are.

I had a small tattoo done when I was 18 because I thought it was a pretty design and because I thought it made me look a bit edgy.

I'm 47 now and love art. I put it on the walls of my house, rather than plastering it all over my body where I can't see it properly.

People have tattoos done to say something about themselves to other people. Tattoos, even when done well, are never really beautiful or subtle - even in the hands of a skilled tattoo artist (and really gifted ones are few and far between, just like gifted artists generally) because the pigments aren't great or subtle. They're often stylised in a clichéd way. Who wants blah art on their body? Except as a way of saying LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME, I'M A SUBURBAN MUM WHO LIVES A COMPLETELY CONVENTIONAL LIFE BUT HEY I'VE GOT BIG TATTOOS SO YOU CAN TELL I'M A BIT EDGY STILL!

The woman in the photo has a neck tattoo. I've never seen or heard of anyone having tattooed on clothes.

I hate the 'what will you look like when you're old' comment more than any other I get asked. It's always directed to women with tattoos so it's not just thick and prejudiced, it's sexist too.

People have tattoos done to say something about themselves to other people. Erm no. 99% of the time mine are covered. I know they are there and that's all that matters.

Who wants blah art on their body? Except as a way of saying LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME, I'M A SUBURBAN MUM WHO LIVES A COMPLETELY CONVENTIONAL LIFE BUT HEY I'VE GOT BIG TATTOOS SO YOU CAN TELL I'M A BIT EDGY STILL! what a bizarre statement. I shall tell my DH he comes under the category of suburban mum needing to show how out there he still is to all and sundry. Crucial given he will be the one staying at home with the baby and according to you, will need to get his tattoos out on any occasion to show them what an edgy mother he is. It's even more strange given we both had our tattoos done, and have our future ones planned out, well before there were ever children on the scene.

Lemiserableoldgimmer you do indeed live up to your nickname, and then some.

Like I said, I misjudged the photo, and it was meant with humour.

I have a feeling you are really offended, and that you are after an apology, but I honestly dont see what I have done wrong here.

So I will just leave it at this and leave you all to it.

Note, I have not said anything against tattoos, but maintained that people do what they like to their bodies.

"People have tattoos done to say something about themselves to other people. "

Maybe sometimes, maybe not. You might consider that your one tattoo at 18 gives you the authority to speak for all tattooed people everywhere, but I would, respectfully, disagree. And in any case, saying something about yourself is something we all do with the clothes we wear, the places we live in, the jobs we do, the papers and books we read, the cars we drive, even the food we eat... all of these things communicate something about ourselves, so your point isn't really the dazzling insight you fondly believe it to be.

Your feeling is wrong, I'm not especially offended or after an apology.

What a weird literal minded response to my comment Living.

Maybe you can explain what having pictures drawn on your body represents to you and your DH then? What is it an expression of?

If it's purely for the purpose of decoration, so you can enjoy looking at it, why does it have to be permanent? There are very few things I have in my life for decorative purposes that I would want to not be able to change, from the pictures on my wall, to a hairstyle that was glued in place, to permanent earrings.

There is something about the fact that tatts are permanent that makes them appealing. Why do you think that is? Why would you choose a permanent tattoo over one that you can change if it's simply there as body decoration for you and your DH to enjoy?

Findo

I don't claim any authority or any special insight. Your response to me is a bit 'playground' - have I needled you.

I agree that we choose hairstyles, clothes etc to communicate things about ourselves and our values. Which is why I wouldn't want to be forced to wear the same clothes/hairstyles for the rest of my life - I've changed over the decades and will continue to change. Some things and ideas which were once meaningful and important to me are no longer important, and I'm glad therefore that I didn't have representations of them etched permanently onto my body. I want my body and public image to reflect who I am now, not who I was last year, or, god forbid, thirty years ago.

What a weird literal minded response to my comment Living

I'm really not sure how else your comment was supposed to have come across? Was there some double meaning you were trying to put across when you decried all with tattoos as suburban mothers clinging onto some strange definition of cool as they glide ungracefully into middle age? If that wasn't your point, then what was?

I have already explained earlier on in the thread that my tattoos were done for very personal reasons, and will continue to be done for that fact. They are for me, not anyone else. The same stands for my DH.

A PP already said very succinctly there are tattoos and there are TATTOOS. The point remains that everyone has a tattoo or multiple tattoos done for very different reasons. It is wrong to lump everyone together and then take some sort of moral superior stance as some posters have done on this thread.

And if the OP feels they are art and her body is a canvas, then so be it. It's her body and her decision which she sounds happy with. Art is one of the most subjective things out there, as I am sure you can appreciate. Some people will love it, some people will hate it. The vast majority probably won't even notice or care.

The woman with the neck tattoo will have a wrinkly neck tattoo when she is 70 though, won't she.

For all the people who go on about what we will be like when we are older.

I have never seen a thread started by a tattooed person that says 'people without tattoos are weird, what will they look like when they are 70?'

Probably because we don't give a shit if people don't get tattoos. It's their life. So why do they care about our tattoos?

The modern craze started after David Beckham got his, yes, I know the Maoris, Zulus and no doubt many other peoples of the world used them thousands of years ago but the latest craze apart from sailors, occasional rock stars and the odd one off, really got started after 1999.

People like to think they are a bit outré, a bit of a rebel but it's really following a fashion imo.

And like fashions on people, some look amazing and some oh dear!

" Your response to me is a bit 'playground' "

I'd love to know what playgrounds you grew up in. Round my way, children don't often run round baiting each other with pithy insults like "I respectfully disagree".

"Which is why I wouldn't want to be forced to wear the same clothes/hairstyles for the rest of my life. I want my body and public image to reflect who I am now, not who I was last year, or, god forbid, thirty years ago."

Good for you! I respect your feelings on that point, even though I feel differently. Gosh, it's almost like my brain can accommodate the idea that people have different values, and might choose to express those values in different ways. I don't think I'm all that clever, so why is it that I can manage this simple feat, and yet you can't?

I think you are being selfish op yes it's your body but if you love your partner why would you want to make yourself unattractive to them. My dh would hate it if I cut my hair short so I keep it long.

living the 'literal minded' comment was referring to you saying your DH was 'a suburban mum'. As for the reference to age - I don't think this is an issue. There are plenty of older women out there leading lives of of a radical nature - artists, activists, those who have rejected social norms in a meaningful way. But when I see someone with tattoos who is in every other way completely conventional, I can't help feeling that they believe their tattoos are like a sort of passport to street credibility. I particularly think this of people who have massive tattoos in places they themselves can't see but other people can, like their back.

Of course the OP can do what she wants, nobody is arguing with her right to have someone draw all over her/dye herself green/wear a toilet seat around her neck/shave her eyelashes off. We all have a right to autonomy when it comes to our bodies and what we put on them.

Findo - I DO appreciate that other people may prefer to 'fix' their image at a moment in their lives. There have always been people like this. Used to have a 70 year old teddy boy living down our road who still wore brothel creepers and drainpipe trousers, and this was in the 1990's. I sympathise with the feeling - time passes so fast and sensing life passing by does sometimes make you want to cling on tho something that gives your sense of identity an air of permanence.

If anyone said to me they didn't want me to have any more tattoos I'd tell them straight where to go. It's my body & my choice. I have 12 so far and a lot more planned and I don't plan to stop any time soon. If others don't like them then that's theie opinion and they don't have to get them on their body, but I want them, I like them, it's my choice and everyone else can bugger off.

Except as a way of saying LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME, I'M A SUBURBAN MUM WHO LIVES A COMPLETELY CONVENTIONAL LIFE BUT HEY I'VE GOT BIG TATTOOS SO YOU CAN TELL I'M A BIT EDGY STILL! What the actual fuck?! Are some people on drugs or something when they come on Mumsnet?

I can't help feeling that they believe their tattoos are like a sort of passport to street credibility. ?????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"People have tattoos done to say something about themselves to other people Uhm no. Through most of the winter, especially where I live by the sea it's freezing, they stay covered as I have none in areas like hands, face, neck etc. I had them done for me. People seem to think it gives them the right to touch them and if they ask questions, I will answer, but unlike you, I don't really care if someone is tattooed or isn't tattooed. Some of my friends are heavily tattooed, some have none at all, they are all the same to me, they just have different likes and dislikes. You seem to have trouble processing this.

I have tattoos because I think they are pretty. I have tattoos because it is like always having a reminder of people and times in my life with me - some carry photos and keepsakes in their wallet, some have photos on their walls, I have tattoos. I spent years having tattoos only in discreet hidden places because of other people's opinions till I stopped caring and started doing what I want, now I have them on my neck, hands, wrists, arms, legs AND discreet places like my bum, hip back etc. If anything by NOT having tattoos on places people could see I was still trying to conform and be myself whilst still trying to gain acceptance from a load of silly judgemental nasty morons whose opinions I really couldn't care less about. I cannot believe the attitudes of some on here, I really didn't think people like that still existed in normal society and it's sad to learn. I accept people for who they are, no matter how they dress, what hairstyle they have, their weight, their make-up or any other personal choices they make about their own aesthetics. I thought normal, educated, good people all did that. Sad. Really sad.

when I see someone with tattoos who is in every other way completely conventional, I can't help feeling that they believe their tattoos are like a sort of passport to street credibility. I particularly think this of people who have massive tattoos in places they themselves can't see but other people can, like their back.

Just maybe, possibly, it is as simple as the fact that they like the look of them and like that particular location?

I have my tattoos on my back, I will get more on my back and at the grand old age of 35 with a baby on the way, I really couldn't give a shit about street cred. Does that even still exist as a phrase? I'm sure the OP and the millions of others who have them there don't either. It goes back to bunging everyone under the same category and not allowing for any sense of individuality or diversity. Of course you can disagree that it is art, or the quality, and getting a tattoo done etc but to assume that people have tattoos done to satisfy some attention seeking urge is baffling.

Your comment read as if you think it is only suburban mums rushing out to get tattoos done which was, and still is, an incredibly odd thing to say imo given the legions of men who have tattoos. You seem to be projecting your own experiences onto others which I appreciate can be inevitable but is almost always going to be wrong.

As for the pp and David Beckham starting a worldwide craze in tattooing outside of cultural reasons such as Maori etc...words fail me. Did the DM do an article on it or something?

random couldn't agree more with your posts. I guess this is an often debated topic on MN and in rl, and it's sad to see that there is so much prejudice out there still. I suspect this is a circular argument which is never going to be won by any side. We can but try though :)

I love this image.

I was born in 1990... I'm 9 years late to this david beckham craze and honestly, if I was going to "follow" someone it's more likely to be a musician like Michael Graves than a guy who runs up and down a green field...

We do get some narrow-minded and "superior" people on here. My God. It's one thing to say you don't like tattoo (which a few have done so nicely) but to insult someone and shove them in your deluded stereotype is pretty [insert curse word here].

My tattoos can only be seen if I wear summer clothes. And as for my back tattoo the only person who gets an opinion is DH because he's the one who has to look at it most. How is it "street cred" (I just snort saying that word) when it's not on show and so you would never know it's there.

I don't judge people who are tattoo free because that's their choice. I certainly don't dump them in a stereotype and insult them. Many people don't like tattoos and that's fine. I like them and that's fine too.

The celebrity thing is hilarious. I was born in 77 and got my first tattoo at 15 in 92. David Beckham was 17 then and not in the public eye. If I was copying anyone it was Nirvana, Red Hot Chillies, GnR, NIN, and of course Cher a.k.a God.