Dating thread 75

[DeliberatelyDreaming]

For everyone OLD or even RL dating. Tell us your stories, share your woe's and get and give support.

Steel I think the guy you are seeing clearly likes you so just go with the flow

I'm finding match annoying. So you can't see who's winked at you? Or viewed you?

Masquerade, is he thinking that as you'll need to arrange childcare it's pointless suggesting a day? Did you ask him out or he ask you?

I'm going to do that Goodguy. I think my problem is I'm used to running about after kids and working but now they are getting older I'm finding I've more time on my hands, so I get bored and that's when fret about him not texting. So I'm going to fill in my spare time by doing more, maybe join a gym or something. Thinking about your situation maybe a joining a gym or some other club would be away for you to meet someone. Do you have any hobbies ? Now that the weather is getting better, what about a walking or running club

Feeling sorry for myself here

I asked him, well I said 'would you like to meet up sometime', pretty vague. Guess that means I should probably suggest a date, maybe I'll just ask when would be good for him. I just want to meet for a quick drink or coffee during the day. He seems to work most days (I work shifts) so I'm thinking maybe when my daughter is at guides during the week.

I am so new to this! I haven't got a clue! I'll leave it till tomorrow now anyway.

I'm using pof not match, I looked at match first because a friend used it but it did seem a bit complicated!

Rum, if you pay for the membership you can see who's winked or viewed you and communicate with anyone you want to.

Masquerade, why don't you just go for it, tell him when you're free and ask him if he'd like to meet up, if he doesn't respond well you know where you stand

I think match just tells you that you've got loads of winks to arouse curiosity and tempt you into subscribing. I think most of my winks were from people employed by match to wink at people. Professional winkers.

Thanks steel.
I'm not sure paying would be worth it. And match are just send me emails about the same man that is viewing me. Is e harmony any better?

Masquerade, I guess then I probably would expect him to have said 'yes definitely, when are you free?'

Yeah that's I would have expected Rummikub but he just said 'yeah definitely'. Hmmm.

I think I'll wait till 9.30pm (arbitrary time) tomorrow and if I don't hear from him then I'll send him a message regarding possible times. Just thought I'm also free during the day on Saturday, but that seems a bit soon.

So how do these conversations go then?

Woman: I'm free on Friday.
Man: We'll have to meet up then.
Woman: Yes, that'd be nice.
Man: So Friday it is then.
Woman: Yes, looking forward to it.(suggest somewhere then !!!)
Man: Man: Me too.(ffs, say where you'd like to go)

Then a Mexican stand off to see who cracks first and breaks the text tennis rule ?
Am I close?

Rum, I only tried Match and I did pay the subscription. This lets you you search for matches and wink at or message rather than just wait for them to send you matches. I know there is Match Affinity I'm not sure how that works but I think they pick your matches based on comparability and send them to you rather than you search through profiles x

I've had that, but I ask where when if I'm interested. I don't if I'm not. But then I wouldn't say yes if I wasn't.

I think both sides want an indication of interest by being proactive.

I got close to one man, we'd messaged for a few days the arranged to meet one Sunday. We both agreed. He didnt message me again after that! I'm not chasing!

Neil that would look good on your CV, previous employment "Professional Winker" lol

Is the calibre of the men the same as on pof, Steel?

Haven't been on POF, my thinking was that they would be likely to be more genuine if they were paying, but I'm sure there are time wasters and genuine people on all sites.

haha yep something like that neil

I feel like I took the risk of rejection in asking if he wanted to meet up, the least he could do is ask about when! Actually you know what, its not even that, I just want to see that he can make decisions/plans/be proactive, I don't want to risk being in a relationship where I feel like someone's mother!

Exactly rummikub I think if he'd asked me I would have said e.g. 'that sounds lovely, when were you thinking?' Or maybe I wouldn't. I definitely wouldn't say yes if I didn't want to, or would I? Hmm.

Ah I just need to suggest a day and time, don't I. I will ask him about a place though, just because I still feel quite new to the area and wouldn't actually know where to suggest! I'm actually not invested enough to care much if it doesn't happen, I just want to know, so I should ask.

That might be a good approach, suggest a day and ask him to choose where (what if he suggests his place?!)

Make sure you pick somewhere where you can't see the door from where you're sat. If you decide he's not the one for you, you can sneak off without being seen.

I've been called worse, Steelchic.

Rum I'm on match and POF.
I find POF attracts a lot of 'undesirable' attention (the obvious serial shaggers etc), but now I'm getting better at spotting and filtering through them I have found a couple of people who seem nice (Beardy included).
Very unimpressed by match. Although I haven't had any (blatantly) dodgy approaches through match, I haven't actually met a single person on there that I've wanted to have more than a brief conversation with. The matches seem to be done on only the basics (height, age etc) and I had quite a few profiles presented as a match, but when I've looked at their profile it states they are not interested in women with children. And Yes you have to pay to actually be able to do anything. To be honest I wouldn't have bothered with match if I had discovered POF first.

pink hope you are ok??

Well yesterday was eventful.
Rubbish day at work but then the charity thing.
Some of you may no about my crap friend well I was going with her and her husband to the do.
Saw Mr IT who I must admit looked bloody sexy, but stood strong said hi you ok which was odd as he'd texted me two hours or so before

Good night till about nine when my friends husband made a pass at me and g polite here basically he grabbed my boobs !
As you can imagine it upset me , I mean I've known them for years.
Long story short found Mr IT to ask to borrow taxi money home told hi. What happened he said you hate taxis nope you can stay with me no m after what we are friends must admit I was wary but he was decent
Took me home lent me Pjs put me to bed .
This morning a note saying let your self out when your ready , text me later sorry we didn't work out , but I've made a good friend.

As fir my mate her husband's excuse I wanted to see if they real !

Not ideal but friends will do

I've bitten bullet and just asked what's going on with us as he seemed distant this week. Will see if i get a reply...

I've bitten bullet and just asked what's going on with us as he seemed distant this week. Will see if i get a reply...

To top it all my mate just texted saying are you ok
The bloody cheek

I would say avoid match, its too expensive for what it is and the same people are on pof and tinder etc anyway! I've got profiles on all of them but don't actively use them all. OK Cupid seems to be full of weirdos, I get some right odd messages from profiles that keep disappearing but then keep coming back! Not sure if they are fake, or maybe someone I know is trying to wind me up!