I've been NC with my narc mother for 2 months now, and due to the fact my father and brothers live with her I've had no contact from them either, until yesterday.
My youngest DB asked for my DP to give him a haircut and came round. It was nice to see him. But of course at the end he said 'so are you going to start speaking to mum and dad again?' I wanted to scream. She uses them all as puppets and it really gets to me. I explained to him why I wasn't intending to speak to her, she lies, she's verbally and emotionally abusive, she's toxic, and told him once he's out of that house and lives a normal life he will realise just how not normal living like that it. He asked me not to say that we had that conversation, and genuinely looked petrified. DP even commented on how scared he looked when he asked.
It's crazy that this tiny woman has terrorised her entire family so much they're literally scared of her.
I feel like I'm coming out of the FOG somewhat. The times where I feel guilty are few and far between, and it's very easy to justify my actions when I remember the horrendous things she has done to me.
When I was 15, I texted a friend about sex, we were talking about what it would be like etc. and my mother, who used to go through my things on a regular occurrence, read them, screamed at me, called me a whore, slut, slag, little prostitute, and physically attacked me, this time my dad got involved and punched me in the stomach. I was 15, it was perfectly normal to be thinking about sex at that age. I hadn't done anything, just talked. I think I was grounded for months and had everything taken out of my bedroom after that, all I had to wear was my school uniform and one pair of knickers. She was determined to make me as ugly as possible.
I remember the time she accused me of pulling the plug out of her bath and letting the water run out, I didn't. She called me liar,stripped me of all my clothes and hit me with a belt until my body was covered in welts. I had to go to school and try to hide them. I wish the teachers would have seen them now. Maybe the abuse would have stopped.
She also accused me of stealing money from my dad's piggy box saying my daughter had told her I did it (my daughter was 4 at the time) I didn't do it, it was later discovered it was my brother. But it was brushed over. I got days and days of abusive text messages and phone calls calling me every name under the sun.
That, and so much more, I can't forgive her for. Or my enabler father for stopping it.
Sorry,it just feels better to get this out. I know it doesn't make pleasant reading...