The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Springing Into Spring Like Super Spingy Springs On A Springy Day!

[Mouseface]

Hello everyone, I'm Mouse :)

Welcome to the Bus, Gerald. Of course it's an imaginary Bus, and we're all aware of that, but we've been on this Bus for a bloomin' long time now so this place kinda feels like home.

See, the thing is, we're a mix of drinkers, non drinkers, total abstainers, and also posters that are or have been, somewhere in between, around the block and back again!

There are no hard and fast rules here, just No judging, No bitching about others and most certainly No expectations of YOURSELF.

No-one can say what will or will not happen whilst you're posting here. You just have to take the ride, One Day At A Time.

There are two sayings that we have painted down either side of the Bus :-

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

You've started to read this thread for a reason, and you'll either carry on and maybe Name Change (or not) and post, walk away, or realise that this is all about YOU, cry for a bit, and then come and take a seat :)

For those who would like a bit of our almost 4 year history, have a read of THIS TRULY INSPIRING THREAD

- AND THIS IS OUR PREVIOUS THREAD TO THIS ONE

We're not a quiche or a clicky group, four years is a long time and longer when you're pissed for some of it, so whilst the threads may look 'clicky', I can promise you, it's just that we all 'know' one another because we've been here for a bit but you'll soon get to know us all, who loves what (CHEEEEEEEESE), but we were all 'new posters' at one time, weren't we? :)

ma I write you a massive post last night then lost the lot but essentially saying that his gentle and sensitive soul will one day maketh the man. The key to a wonderful husband and father is your sensitivity and caring about the feelings of others and your boy has this amazing quality. His body is on the cusp of manhood but has the mind of a child. Sometime very soon it will all calibrate and his confidence will soar. The fact you care so deeply about these issues shows your an amazing mum. If I wasn't invited to a sleepover I would cry for days and question myself endlessly, I realise now I was kind enough to invite everyone and they wet cruel not too, which would you choose your boy to be!!!! You'll laugh about this one day, it's a cliche but it's true, I'm sorry your having a rough time, as your always are for us, we're here for you xxx

wry venus is right, what a difference a day makes, you sound much better. Hugs to mouse joey annie lookingguggs why and anyone else who needs one, I'm very tactile you see, rockin day 20 but feel like I've gained a matching 20 pounds to even things up, need to focus on getting fit not getting fat xxxxxxx

Thanks babes I hope I've managed to sort it out. Basically, an "old flame" + Facebook + a bottle of wine = disaster. Really gave myself a scare though, how close I come to just throwing it all away.

My late gran called booze "the gibbery watter" 2 t's to emphasise a broad east end of Glasgow accent and she wasn't wrong as you've learned!!!! Facebook has destroyed many a marriage while we hanker back to the carefree days of youth and old flames, one of the many reasons I don't have it!!!! No harm done eh xxxx

Oh baby thank you for your kind words and understanding. He is a sweet gentle soul and the urly burly of high school overwhelms him.
He's physically a big lump of a lad who wouldn't hurt a fly - in fact he would probably run away screaming!
He came with me today to take Grandma shopping and she and he finished first. Found them sharing a box of chicken nuggets in MacDonald's ( he's not daft!) And when they had finished he threw his arms round her, snuggled in and said "mmmmm, thanks grandma" in the middle of the shop! Then he carried all her shopping home.
He's a gentle soul, happiest helping me cooking, or pottering round the garden with the cat and I worry about his inability to cope.

ma I had a nephew who was a big cumbersome lump of a lad, he was so shy he couldn't look a soul in the eye, he only looked up from the floor to bash endlessly on his computer, his only true love..., fast forward a few years he is a tall handsome devil, years of learning about computers and playing instruments had turned him into an amazing dj, he plays in a band and girls swoon over him. He ignores most of them, he remembers when they ridiculed him!!! Thing is he still has that sensitive soul and adores his mum and dad and will one day be a devilishly handsome AND sensitive, wonderful husband and father and that's what really maketh the man, the man who'll your son will one day be......xxxx

Hello everyone, I could weep, I just spent an age typing and I've just lost the lot.

So will be a very quick summary, sorrysorrysorry.

ma, your lad sounds like a darling, and baby is spot on, he is going to make the most wonderful man. xx

baby congratulations on day 20! Nearly day 21! I am feart of The Facebook, I daren't do it either, despite my nosiness. Your granny was right re the gibbery watter, that fair made me smile. xx

venus and SocFish thank you so much, you are so right, facing the day with a clear head helps. I was a bit frail on Friday, but I'll be ready for him on Monday. SocFish I hope you enjoyed your book! xx

joey I hope you got everything sorted out okay, and hopefully your damage limitation worked xx

My day? Well I think my default button is set at sleep. I have napped on and off all day. I almost almost almost failed. I had my dad's father's day present in my hand and if it had been easy to replace I would have drank it. I'm disgusting. How low is that? My saving grace? The shop is twenty miles away and is shut tomorrow. I was watching Columbo, I thought I was in a good place. I had some lentil soup and a tin or 3 of coke instead. And two Magnums. Now I know I am not ready for "just one glass".

I walked LittleLab, cried through the rain. I am so scunnered and sad. This is the third weekend in a row my boyfriend hasn't turned up. I know I'm not enough, he's not who I thought he was. Maybe it's me who's changed. It's less painful as the weeks go by but I'm sure it's contributed to my current state of mind. I'm staying strong, he is a sulker, and I always give in and phone first. I can't chase any more. It's doing more for his self esteem, not mine.

Tomorrow I'm going to tackle my heaving wardrobe, throw out the fat clothes, the thin clothes and the haven't worn for twenty years clothes. It may take some time... If I get it done, I'm going to stew some rhubarb from the garden and have it with ginger ice cream. And watch the Forsyte Saga and the lovely Damien Lewis.

Hope you've all had a good day, see you tomorrow, off to feed the hedgehog family now my slavering lab has had her last pee of the evening. They will get to eat in peace once she's in. She's such a hoover. Night night xx

wry where in Scotland are you from? Smiling at "feart" and "scunnered".
You are doing so very very well!

wry you sound stronger by the day, your doing fabulous, also loving the Scottish references, pure dead brilliant hen xxxxx

Another one originally from Scotland (there are a lot of us, aren't there? ) although been living down South since I married a sassenach...

That's it. I'm blaming Scotland.

Day 36(?) done. Really tired all the time at the moment. I think I read somewhere that 6 weeks is when you really start feeling better. Or am I clutching at straws.

Never mind actually. I'll clutch at anything right now that will keep me going. Good night sweet mad babes xxx

I'm an Aberdeenshire quine

I am sat in the midst of the biggest kirn known to man. One of those jobs where you wish you hadn't started it but you've gone by the point of no return. Haud gaun as my granny used to say.

There are clothes, shoes and bags everywhere. I feel like Carrie in Sex And The City when she's flitting. Eighties howlers and all. No pretty heels though. Oi, Manolo, Sunday project for you pet. Start making cheap but quality shoes for square feet.

My Mantra for today is Keep, Charity Shop and Material Recycling Bin. I am fuelled by second day soup, tiger bread and coconut water.

I can do it. Have a good afternoon everyone, see you later xx

Night night SocFish, Haud Gaun, xxx

erm, if soc had finished driving the night bus, dlooks like we are short of a driver while she snoozes.

Buckle up babes!!

Ma babe I've just read back (been away for a couple of nights) I can really relate to the situation you've got with your DS and his friends. My DD who is now 15 had a really hard time settling in to secondary school. The first year was awful, she would come home and cry, the dynamics in her group really effected her. Her second year wasn't too bad. She's now in Year 10 and she still has days when she really doesn't want to go (Friday being one of them, she had the day off) The school are not happy with her attendance (she used to be 100% and now she's down to 83%) but like you say you can't force them to go to school He sounds so lovely it's really good that he's sharing how he's feeling and that he's letting out emotions about it. I would just keep going the way that you are with 'open' communication, he will get there in the end. Others can be so cruel. I always say to both my DDs, keep your head high and try not to let anyone see how you're really feeling. You always have me to talk to and cry with. Sorry if that wasn't that helpful. >

Hi, tis me, Mouse

Ma - sorry to skim through but I have done. I've read a little about your DS not happy whether in or out of school.... It's so hard to deal with school issues. I'm unclear, I really hope that every thing works out okay, I really do. Big hugs to you.

I'm so sorry for all of the typos of late, the medication changes have sent me absolutely of my trolley, and I've been alcohol free (completely) even though we've had a few celebrations along the way, and since I last posted that I was drowning a few weeks ago, going into hospital DID NOT BOTHER me one bit. I didn't miss drinking at all. I didn't look at the clock thinking DH would be having a glass of wine.... or when we'd been to meet people, I'd drink a soft drink, as if it was a sign that this gallbladder was on it's way....? Maybe?

I can't find that post when I wrote about drowning etc, feeling so low but since I was rushed to hospital, maybe I took stock of my life?

Something changed? I know all of my posts are all me, me, me, me, at the moment but it's like I'm going through the rain in the middle of the night, pounding on the windscreen, the wipers hardly working yet I still go, forward, never backwards, just forwards.

It's like I've bothered to remember to think before doing something. Does that make sense to anyone else?

I'm sorry to be dashing off again, but I need to try and cut Nemo's hair.

To all of you that are new, I'm usually much more chatty and in touch with all of you, all of YOUR problems and not whinging on about my own miseries. Sorry guys for being a rubbish source of support right now. But at least I am sober use of support!

I'll keep an eye on the thread re the number of posts left so that we have a post to post on.

I'm sorry not to have name checked. My meds are meddling with my short term memory, which is very scary, I'm tending not to drive as much as I get jittery so the same is happening when typing and talking etc.... I get a bit all over the place.

Anyway, I'll still be here, lurking when I can and chatting too :) xxx

Sorry for any typos.

mouse - love ya!

Mouse you were beyond sweet to me on another thread, you're not being me, me, me at all.

Sending you a big squidge, look after yourself, xx

spanna thank you. Ds seems happy tonight, we have drawn up a plan of action for this week, with targets and issues and strategies. He seems to respond to this. Homework is done, uniform ready and he is playing Minecraft.
We will see how to morrow goes. I could do without the hassle tomoz as I had a flat tyre today and have the stupid temporary thingy one so will have to get a tyre first thing and be late in work.
mouse good to see you back sweetheart.

mouse lovely to see you back

Mouse you don't have to catch up with everything, just jump on and respond to the last post. You'll soon be back in the thick of it.

(Oh, a bring refreshments will ya, we've been living off opal fruits here)

x

Marvellous Monday to you all

Tonight I am going out with my favourite soberest friend. She has a medical problem which means that she can rarely drink.

I am ashamed to admit that a few years ago I saw her very infrequently - and then often as a prelude to something more alcohol fuelled

When I started to get sober she was one of the easiest people to be around. Because she wasn't a drinker I didn't ever have to explain or excuse my non-drinking, and because 'not drinking' was what she was used to , I could simply tag along with her and copy what she did. I learnt a lot just by observing.

So tonight we will meet after work and our first stop will be a really glamorous bar where we will luxuriate in the surroundings and quench our thirst with an ice-cold non-alcoholic cocktail made by a handsome waiter Then we will go for dinner. We will eat, but not too much, and then we will go on to a wonderful snug place for coffee and a shared pudding - served by a dishy Italian waiter Oh and I forgot to say we will laugh and laugh and laugh. And maybe cry. She is lovely, empathetic and she has a wicked, wicked sense of humour. While I was drinking I was so focussed on going out with my drinking buddies that I hadn't noticed how wonderful and funny she is.

We will also spend less in the whole evening than I previously would have spent on drinking. I will drive home and be tucked up in bed, sober and cool, and full of happy endorphins.

I have never told her what an alcoholic mess I was previously, or how much I appreciate the lessons I've learnt from her - so I'll post my gratitude here, and hope that somehow, she feels appreciated.

That's a nice post venus. Think I said up thread somewhere about meeting new people and immediately having to decide whether they will be "friends" based on their alcohol consumption which means writing off potential friends such as yours without ever getting to know them properly. All based on alcohol. Sad isn't it.

Hello all. Just a quick post primarily to say hello to Mouse- am so glad to know that you are ok-ish, really hope the pain management works etc. Everyone's been thinking of you, lots.

I knew it was all going too well - sailed along to day 13 and then fell off bus comprehensively at first hurdle. Pathetic really - was away with work, went to a lunch, someone offered me a glass of wine and I said yes, and that was it - bang - without even thinking about it. And that was it for 3 days. I am not beating myself up about it - but it was interesting to see me treat those 3 days as a treat (if that makes sense) - I knew that I'd be stopping again when I got home so I 'allowed' myself to drink (far too much - no illusions at all now about controlled drinking - when I drink I spend the whole time planning the next drink, very predictable and very tiring!). Interesting to see it. Anyway, now back and feeling fine about starting again - going to try to combine it with not eating the content of a bakery on a daily basis this time, too.

Hope everyone is doing ok. Ma - been thinking about your son, hope he is at school today without too much hassle and sadness for the both of you, and that he has an ok day. He sounds really lovely.

Hi scarf well now you've completed that experiment - you know what doesn't work! Nothing pathetic about it, but maybe something to be learnt from.... and sounds like you have picked your
self up and have new plans

ma have you got this book ? I have heard it recommended for actually suggesting ways in which people can cope with bullying etc.

he went in today ok.. just hoping he had a positive day.
Today he will play football with dh after school and tomorrow we will do some baking so he has things to look forward to.
venus I just ordered that book on the spot. Thank you