The Dating Thread 71

[TheCrow]

Welcome to all daters :)

I'm sorry, lizzie. What a fool he is.

HelloBoys, I've sent a pm :-)

Morning everyone. Spoke to Mr Postman on the phone last night for 20 mins, seems nice, chatty and am looking forward to meeting him tomorrow for coffee - this too is a Tinder date.

My subscription with match.com ends today 219 views, loads of winks and an odd message from short, 60 yr olds (I'm 45) but nothing worth shouting about. I messaged loads of guys but find it a very strange site.

May go back on POF as I quite like that site and the chat option is good!

sola I get loads of 60 year olds that message me - my search criteria is 41-51!

chairy fab news about your date

lizzie so sorry about your discovery, that happened to me years ago when I first did OLD

lizzie so sorry to read that. Some people are just bastards, aren't they?

I'm really nervous about the children meeting the man I'm seeing today. I'm really not sure it's the right thing to do. We're only meeting for lunch and then seeing how that goes. I feel really uncomfortable about, if I'm honest, but I don't think I could be out of the country with someone for a week without the children having met them, regardless of who it was.

He's looking forward to meeting them, they're looking forward to meeting him. It's not been set up as anything major, just an introduction.

I think I must be nervous about because last night I dreamt my exH wanted me back. He'd written a list of all the things he liked about me. And I tried getting away from him but everywhere I went he was there.

I think I just feel uncomfortable because I very strongly feel that children don't need to be dragged into adult relationships and people often introduce the children for the wrong reasons. And also because I'm worried about introducing them and it ending 2 weeks later.

folk I know exactly where you're coming from. My exP sort of instigated meeting my DC a little bit too quickly when I met him 6 years ago. I was very smitten and went along with it at the time.

It isn't something I would do now. But it is so very hard. Just remember he doesn't have to meet them again for a while after today!

louby No exactly. I've been seeing this man for a good few months. It's not a 'whirlwind' thing by any means, sort of slow and steady...

I've had a lot of doubts about how he feels/whether he likes me/does he fancy me... because it's wasn't overwhelmingly passionate and full of huge declarations, even thought I know those declarations are big red flags. I know that I'm having difficulty discerning between someone not being abusive and not being interested because it looks exactly the same to me.

It was my suggestion that he meet the children because of going away together. I did sort of half expect him to question whether it was really necessary. He said he was a bit nervous, but looking forward to meeting them.

My daughter is very much looking forward to meeting him. The badge it machine has been out this morning and she's made him half a dozen badges with cartoon (Scooby Doo style) zombies on them because she knows he likes horror films. I'm not sure how much experience he has of enthusiastic 7 year old girls...

Doesn't he have any kids? I have 2 typical smelly, loud boys who are 14 & 11 and I dread anyone new meeting them, especially as my last relationship broke down because my exP didn't 'get' them! Amongst other things!

On the one hand it's easier to date guys with no kids but on the other hand guys who've got kids understand the situation more ifykwim?

He has a teenage nephew...

But no, no children. My son is quite quiet and will either be charming, witty and delightful or moody, sullen and will pick fault in everything anyone says.

Pot luck which I get!

Having dated one man with children, I'd rather date someone without, to be honest. Simply because I could see parenting differences becoming a real issue if we'd ended up being serious. We didn't meet each other's children, but even just discussing different approaches to things made me realise just how important compatability in that area would be for me.

hi. can I join? went on first date last week through OD been on there since start of march. going again, hopefully, Monday too with same bloke. i was married for 10yrs and together with ex for 13 yrs altogether so I feel so out of my depth.

Hi Mini

How did your first date go?

Well, I tweaked my profile on Telegraph dating, sent a couple of messages out, short but picking out a couple of points off the profile. I've had one very nice long reply, where I feel he has actually read my profile!! So will reply to that later today.

Registered with POF, inundated with wants to meet you, added as favourite, but no actual real contact!! Although a quick message this morning. Profiles on POF seem quite short.

I've been thinking in my head about the children/no children. I am a single parent so have DS on my own quite a lot. I do feel that if someone hasn't had their own children then they may not get some of the issues. However in my age group many men have much older children and so are much freer for travel and that. Very tricky!

folk it went well I think. well he asked me to go out again so must have been OK. he seemed very lovely and just same as has been in messages been exchanging. but god its so hard to tell and I'm a born worrier!

just trying to enjoy it for what it is and see what happens
I have 2 DDS and he has none. nearly 7 yrs younger than me too so I feel a bit old. he says not to be so silly.

it is so nice to have some fun and attention after a crappy 12 months

tiredandsadmum POF profiles are so short! I like there to be a bit of information about the person but some just don't tell you anything.

folkgirl I am sure it will go well! Don't think you can expect a first meeting to go perfectly but I think it is good that the children meet the person you will be going away with. I don't have children and the guy I am seeing has a child so I don't know how that would work out.

mini Fun and attention sound good!

TBH I am having a bit of a freak out about the guy I am seeing. Just posted a thread on it. Not sure if it is all my insecurities (didn't realise I had so many!!) or what. Not seeing him until Thursday now so there is a lot of time to wind myself up between now and then.

welcome mimi
glad the dating is going well x

Morning all, back to square one on dating front. Find it all a bit exhuasting tbh

blossom Back to square one doesn't sound good. Hope you are doing ok.

Lizzie I wouldn't see him then tail it off. This man is effectively cheating on you and needs pulling up on it. I'd get your friend to screen-grab his message and print it out, then next time you meet up say your friend is starting online dating and guess who's messaged her?! When he says 'who?' hand over the printout and ask for his explanation. Then walk away, because you deserve better.

Solasum Don't ever say you have 'baggage' in a negative way, my lovely. We are all the sum of our parts and what we've each been through makes us who we are. If men are put off by your child, or anything else, that's their issue not yours.

Folk Hope today goes well!

Minime Welcome .

I've decided not to see MCS tomorrow, as I think it would be more painful for me to spend time with him then not see him again for weeks on end. It's clear he's just shoehorning me in because I suggested it and he isn't really that interested, so it'll be easier in the long run just to end it now. I just want to think of a dignified message to send him that doesn't make me sound pissed off, desperate, sarcastic or passive aggressive. Any suggestions welcome!

Been messaging a bloke on POF for the last five or six days who seems ok. He hasn't mentioned meeting up yet though but if he does, I'll allocate him a nickname then .

ofg I am fine, am chatting to some nice people but things over with MrSA, I thought he was genuine but have good reasons to believe he has been telling me a load of crap

Hi all. I'm back to square one with dating though I have enjoyed going back on pof good for the ego if nothing else!

I have two dates this coming week, one for a walk and tea, the other for a drink after work. I haven't been on a date for years. Are they likely to ask much about DS? They know I have a son, but I am guessing they were not imagining he'd be a baby.

I think I'm going to have to have a word with Mr Blanket :( I saw him on Thursday night, he asked if I would be able to see him over the weekend which I said no because I was at work and had DD etc, he sent me a text later on saying he 'didn't like time apart'. It's only going to be 3 nights where I don't see him, and I'm the opposite, I need my own space. We spoke very early on and both said we didn't want anything serious but I think I might be the only one who still sees it that way. Plus I'm still not getting the butterflies, we just seem to have gone straight into boring comfortable territory.

Got a message a while ago from someone, I'll call him Mr Bookie. He saw me on a bookies facebook page and got in touch. I've spoken to him on the phone a few times even though I hate talking on the phone and in a weird way he gives me a little flutter in the tummy even though I've never met him. It might be something to do with his geordie accent though :D He's talking about meeting up which I feel is another reason why I want to call things off with Mr Blanket, even though we're not exclusive I think he'd be upset if he knew I'd met other people. At the same time trying very hard not to get too into Mr Bookie as that's what I did with Mr Banana, was too into him when we were just at the messaging stage and it didn't end well!

Jarlin that sounds like a lovely evening with Mr SB, it sounds like he's willing to work things out instead of clamming up and refusing to talk about it which is great :)

hi girls :-) I'm on match and eharmony and have a nice profile up but struggling to get much interest? been on 10 dates... 8 liked me but not my cup of tea and 2 i liked didnt like me! Ive got that i have a child on there.. is that the reason for little interest? which sites do u recommend pls??

Ok I have a date tonight from match. After a few wines last night and a very quick chat online, he asked me out saying he'd rather meet in person. As I've had quite a few contacts fizzle out over a few weeks of chat, I thought why not.

But now I'm sick with nerves! It's my first from OD this time round and I'm really, really nervous. I almost cancelled about an hour ago. Talk me down!

rosen just go, enjoy the moment. What have you got to lose.

is there an internet dating forum/discussion board/talk thing on mumsnet? x