The Dating Thread 71

[TheCrow]

Welcome to all daters :)

I beginning to think when men put, looking for dating on POF basically means I want a shag. I'm actually ok with that but rather they were honest. Am I being harsh?

I think that too blossom ..

I agree Blossom. Just dating/hang out is casual sex but then a lot of blokes put looking for a relationship because they think that's what women want but they're still only after casual sex.

There used to be "intimate encounter" on POF - not sure if it's still there and I ain't checking. On the early threads (I've lurked since Thread 1... ) there was an experiment by posters who changed their profile to IE to see if traffic improved (they had no intention of an ONS and made it clear in their profile). It did and with some decent blokes too.

I think the OLD game is full of players and liars, just like rl I suppose. Finding it all a bit exhuasting atm.

Got a date on Sunday with Mr Postman! Meeting for a coffee. Chatting loads via whatsapp and he seems pretty genuine. Only niggle is he's got no kids which worries me.

But will be keeping my kids away from any men for a loooong time this time around!

That's it, all I can hear now is Karen Carpenter singing "wait a minute, wait a minute, Mr Postman".

louby I know what you mean about someone not having kids but might be a very good reason. If he has never wanted them then maybe a different story.

I have a dare next week. MrQuiff, who is actually the same age as me...I have never dated someone the same age as me! Thus far, he is very funny and we have been chatting about cooking, which we both enjoy.

Also messaging someone who knows people I know, but lives far away and someone who has made me laugh a ridiculous amount considering he has only messaged me twice!

blossom ah, it would be lovely if everyone was honest on OLD sites! Thing is, it would make it lots easier for those who do want a ONS to actually find each other.

blossom he was married for 20 yrs and he told me they just decided they didn't want kids. Bizzarely he is ex-army, which is a bit spooky as exP was also ex-army.

Maybe I have a 6th sense. They are very tidy lol

BandA I'm singing it now

What pisses me off is there are lots of sights out there for sex only, why bloody pretend and all the bullshit. As I said earlier I would be well up for that with the right person.

I'm not familiar with the PO categories, but "dating" isn't the most cryptic way of saying "pint and a shag" both of which are some of my favourite way to pass an evening. Unless someone really likes exploring the bars of their hometown, then it's pretty clear what someone means if they don't opt for a more relationshippy category.

Santa I was going to post earlier along the same lines as Bant. It seems like you expect him to be a mind reader. He brought up the issue of coming off the sites and being exclusive and you ducked out of it? You're right that coming off offers no real guarantees that someone will be faithful, although it does make it less likely that the sweet trolley will slam into their ankles and they'll fall face first into a cream pie but IMHO it is a necessary condition to moving the relationship onwards. If someone reacted the way you did I'd assume they still wanted to keep their options open in all honesty.

I can't find anyone online of interest at the moment. I'm just not ready.

Keep thinking that if I had never sent geeky that text asking if he was an emotional abuser, we'd still be together now.

Maybe you would, dont, but if you hadn't asked him and held that mirror up to him, would it have changed the truth? Or would it just have allowed you to ignore it...

He wouldn't have reacted as strongly as he did if he didn't recognise himself a little bit, I don't think. He'd have laughed it off and reassured me.

Well I have an update for you all. Last night I brought the conversation round to the dating sites, can't remember how but it was very casual. I think I saw a notification from POF when he was on his phone and asked if he still goes on there. Slightly worryingly he said no, so I pushed it by saying, really? Are you sure? Then he said well I do check whose viewed me sometimes. So he suggested he would come off both POF and match

He said he had tried to come off POF before but couldn't work out how then gave me his phone to see if I could do it. So now the account is deleted. We both did the same with match straight afterwards. He looked really happy and said he was pleased as it was like we had made a small commitment to eachother, sweet hey. :)

Delighted for you santa , pof is a funny one to delete and I suppose while you have an account easy to keep checking in. Good on you for sorting it :)

santa good news, when is the holiday?

Well did not txt MrSA, Was busy chatting a to few nice people last night so kept me occupied, 7 different men actually lol. Have a good day all.

Thanks blossom holiday is in June

Hi jarlin it's nice you and mr SB are supporting eachother. You also have the weekend away to look forward to :) perhaps a awhile weekend together will speed things up a bit

Meant to say a whole, not a while

Jarlin no middle of bloody nowhere and my list is pretty much the same, especially holding fish, lol. Ignore loads, messaging ok, then insist on speaking on the phone, many are rejected at this point. I have only ever met 4 so far, but this following week may change. Got a forlorn message form mr Fish, (remember him) I met him and then sent txt letting him down gently, Had to be a bit more forthright last night.

dontcall - if geeky is that put off by a text and wasn't he the one that jumped on us lot here (?!) then he isn't for you.

Jarlin better to be slow burning than like mine which was over in 3 months!

dont - I am just a bit like you but not even looking. Only on match crapfinity and can't be bothered signing up elsewhere ATM. OLD takes so much time!

Hello, I guess you're right. He was looking for an excuse I think. Why he still came over for sex a week after we'd split up when he bloody well knew I loved him, I do not know. That was actually cruel.

Jarlin, I'd agree, slow is good. I had probably the most intense relationship on this thread and look how that one turned out. Sigh. I'm struggling to let go of my broken dreams there.

My list is extensive, even though no one interests me at the moment. They have to have dark hair, preferably 6 foot plus (6'3 is my ideal), athletic build, very very clever (this is vital), ability to spell, funny, attractive to me, clean, smells nice and live reasonably near to me. Oh and give me butterflies. Geeky met the whole list but he was an idiot who eats cheese in bed and talks about his willy on the Eurostar.

Oh!
6 foot tall, dark haired, bright, good speller who lives in my city has just messaged me.