The Dating game - welcome all daters to the DATING THREAD 70!!!

[girliefriend]

Thought it was my turn to start the thread!!

Jarlin So frustrating isn't it, for me I can't help thinking MrSa would make more of an effort, when tog he is amazing and he send lots of lovely texts but hard to meet up. I also feel a little guilty about meeting mr hotguy but I think that is silly to feel that way, Remind me how long have you been seeing mr SlowBurner

Jarlin - 1 of the men is in a sort of love triangle or more with 2 other women - don't ask and I would've gone on a date but that's about it, nothing serious.

The other man was way too keen but just wasn't my type and was too complimentary - overly so.

Don't take offence but these were pub men - eg one is the manager of the pub and the other one drinks there a lot. Their social lives appear to revolve around the pub.

Anyway last night they were both together after I told Love Triangle man no. and the 2nd one was asking LT to ask for my number. I politely declined it. but it is nice to be wanted. eeek.

Just seen MR Scot Accent online POF ( mind you I am on there too)

Hey all, will read and have a catch up. Had a great weekend in London, no men remotely my age but had so much fun. And good dressed up pics for my profile.

Speaking of what sites? Pof?

Hope all ok xx

Folk Hope your counselling goes well today. Let us know how you get on. I had counselling last year and it made a huge difference to me and my outlook on life.

Jarlin Not had any responses from the messages I sent on POF last night but I felt better just sending them. Good for you messaging someone! It's becoming clearer and clearer that Mr Coffee Shop isn't right for me. If he wanted me, he'd make an effort, right? He hasn't. Was messaging Mr Teacher until 1am last night though .

Blossom You're not too demanding in wanting to see someone more than once a week. It sounds like MrSA is making excuses not to meet up, a bit like MCS did/does with me. I know MCS has been on Tinder too, but then so have I. It wouldn't surprise me if MCS was on other sites too. I think the only solution is to get stuck in and date other men, so you're doing the right thing meeting up with Mr Hot Guy.

Queen I use Tinder and I'm on POF.

Thanks soft I am new to all this and trying to keep relaxed about it all. I will certainly see MRScotAcc if he wants to but will just pull back, if he is keen he will find a way to make it work. I think it is great he wants to spend time with his daughter but every Saturday day/Night and seems most of Sunday and most nights it that is what he really is doing then seems little time for anything else.

I think it's difficult when someone doesn't seem to have enough time to see you as you'd like.... it's what makes me wonder if I have time for one myself. I work, have 2 primary aged children, and their dad doesn't see them at all. They see his family 1 day a fortnight roughly, but apart from that it's only when I have a babysitter, which i can't afford too often, or a couple of hours between work and school pick up. That's partly why I've tended towards fairly casual arrangements.

I decided to meet up with Mr casual from work - he seemed nice... I liked him a lot better than others I've met recently. But on the other hand it's just more of what I'm a bit fed up of.

Santa - things with Bricky sound lovely, try and relax.

Folk - it's good you have been able to talk about things, I hope he realises that he needs to treat you as you deserve or lose you.

Jarlin - sounds like slowburner has a lot on his plate - it must be very difficult for him to have a relationship right now.

Just wrote a long post which didn't appear on the thread

But to summarise - thank you to those of you who reassured me about my feelings for Mr Wonderful last week. I had a lovely weekend with him and am panicking less/ relaxing more. In fact I have a weird spidey sense that I'm going to marry this man god writing that made me shiver! I'm 35 years old and have had 4 significant relationships, and I've honestly never thought that before so it's not something I would say lightly at all. In fact I am more of a commitmentphobe than not.

Anyway, I am of course still a bit nervous that things will go epically wrong. So it's still wait and see... But I hope that (so far!) this is a nice positive story. Whatever happens between us he really is a massively lovely person so there really are some of them out there online dating!

That's lovely Littlemouse - I really hope it works out, it's always good to hear positive stories.

littlemouse sound lovely good luck.

I have just probably fucked up now as just sent a text to mrSa saying hi, and said seems like you have been very busy on POF today xx, no reply as yet. More I think about it I think he is using work and kids as an excuse, I would rather he was honest.

Blossom I totally understand why you did that because it's horrible when you realise someone you're dating is still using OD but that text has done several things. Firstly it shows that you've also been on POF, either looking for other men or checking up on MrSA (the latter of which may make him run for the hills). Secondly it puts him in a position of power because he knows that him being on there has rattled you. Thirdly, what can he reasonably reply to that? He can either deny it (unlikely), come up with an excuse such as he was looking at your profile again (sadly, this would most likely be a lie) or he could merely say 'Yes I have.', thus putting you on the back foot.

Remind me how long you've been seeing him?

If you sent that text just before you posted about it, that's not too long ago, so you can still recover it. Of course you can just wait and see if he replies then take it from there but if it was me I'd send another one saying something like 'I've been on there today too updating my profile and noticed you were online when I was having a browse. Not many men coming up to my exacting standards on there today though, unfortunately! x'.

That not only says that you are still looking around too and are taking active steps to do so, but that you have high standards that a man has to achieve to get you interested. The bit of humour shows you're being a bit tongue-in-cheek and the kiss shows that you are still interested in him, and because you're still interested in him, he must be coming up to your high standards.

Let us know what you decide and how you get on.

soft his reply was that is always says it he was on there when he is not, not the first person to have said that btw, I said I was on there deleting messages, it is early days and I have just said he is a free agent so entitled to do what he likes, which is true,to be fair we have made no commitments to each other yet. I am being crabby as having a truly horrible day

Hi all.
Blossom...good luck wiyh hot guy. Toilet break update?

Folk...i go to counselling after my ltr broke down 7 months ago. Its helped me immensely in particular my self esteem and confidence.

Mr 4 ...remember he stopped texting last week and he cancelled on me due to his grief from tragic end to last gf. Well he text me last night but still no arrangements to meet so i give up.

Advice...i quite fancy a guy at work. He recently dated a colleague who is a friend and he ended it with her. I got the feeling today he fancies me. Would it be bad if i flirted back? Dont want to hurt friend. My gut says no but he is hot. Confused.

Just been stood up for Mr hot guy, said he said hope I don't mind but he us still at work and knackered and would like to postphone, he has also been fannying around all day about where to meet. I have replied yes do mind as a I turned down a couple of offers and good luck with POF. Is that harsh. I am not too upset just a bit pissed off as really could have put energy into some else/

Forget i said that...the answer is no! OD has fuzzled my brain. Although not a good friend, she is a colleague!! I shall just take the compliment and pop on pof!
Santa...hows your mum?
Blossom...hot guy update?

Blossom...cross post sorry.
Good reply and serves him.right...not too harsh at all.
Being knackered is no excuse. He could have met for a quick drink.

Well he does live about an hour away, but it was all the mucking around and I talked to him for about an hour last night not sure I get his sense of humour. I actually wanted to reply "oh fuck off then" but I am in a really shitty mood today

Lol...i know what you mean. Ive felt like that too!
Well...if its meant to be...he'll be back!
Did hereply btw?

flora my mum is home now :) has to go for further tests later in the week

I haven't heard from Bricky at all today. He normally texts in the evening but nothing so far. Starting to worry its because I suggested going out with my daughter and partner Friday evening. Surely this is not going to happen to me again. I though he'd be happy to meet my daughter as I'd met his family already

No he has not replied, it would take some serious sucking I am tempted to delete he number, his loss.
santa hope you hear from Bricky soon.I have decided that men are shit at communicating

blossom I thought you gave a good reply to mr hot, let's him know you won't be messed around

Bricky has just text me :) I should have more faith in him but I think it will take a while. I keep expecting something to go wrong

splish I texted him earlier, just something nice that let him know I still like him and haven't gone off him. He replied, something equally short and sweet and told me he misses me.

But I'm going to delete his number from my phone now. I want to make sure that I don't accidently fall into doing the Pick Me dance. If he wants me he can come and get me, but I've done the dance before (before I knew what it was) and, sadly, on reflection it's always turned out to be a case of "be careful what you wish for, you might just get it!"

I don't trust myself to not text him. I wasn't going to text today and then I did!