The Dating game - welcome all daters to the DATING THREAD 70!!!

[girliefriend]

Thought it was my turn to start the thread!!

lois 5 minutes but apparently I am a minx, MRSA lol, see what you mean, he far from an infection. I am actively texting two othe lovely guys today. MR SCOTTISH ACCENT, needs to show a bit more willing before I put eggs in one basket.

Ooh I love a Scottish Accent. OK, I'm back on OKC tonight then. Yesterday's date sent me a text to make sure I was home safe, but that is all. That's fine, it was nice evening but nothing more. To be honest I'd rather date someone in the city I'm living in - Mr Last Night lives where I work. It took me two hours to get home...

Lois it's not a guy/girls divide; it's whatever you personally feel comfortable and I wouldn't judge anyone else. When multi-dating I'd probably be catching up with online message stuff on the bus home from the date.

I don't actually have any messages but I can have a browse.

aaarghh - can anyone give me advice re what I posted earlier eg do I meet up with ex or not for a closure chat?

or is this just bad news....

HelloBoys If he used the expression trust and abandonment issues he could be self-aware and very honest - or he may have been preparing you for being dumped. Even more so if he had convenient wifi problems when you tried contacting him. That frankness men can conjure up occasionally can be so endearing, we feel there's a real depth of connection, but it can also be a strategy.

So no, I'd let him go, don't waste time rying for a satisfying conclusion.

waves to donkey

Hello I think it'd depend on what you actually want from it, and does it really need to be face to face. If there's just some things you want to apologise for and leave it at that, then send an email or make a phone call, say what you have to say and wish him well. Is there really anything he can say face to face that will make you feel any better? If so what are the chances of him actually saying those things, is it not equally likely that he could say/do something else that'd make it even worse? Is there a chance that you a secretly hoping that a face-to-face meeting could lead to a reconciliation?

I don't think closure is something anyone else can give you - it's something you achieve by yourself. .

When housemateguy (the last one I was with) ended things with me, I did phone him for a closure chat, there were a few things I wanted him to know. The phone call was much better than a meeting would have been; it was immediate, no build up or waiting, no awkward goodbye, and he didn't have much opportunity to make anything worse for me. I have not heard from him since.

OneDay - I know what I want from it deep down (yes shoot me, back with the idiot).

His mobile phone (seaside in Kent) we've tried to have phone convos before and I could barely hear him though he could hear me.

Donkeys - I see what you mean. I don't know. re both sides. I hate to see the bad side in things/people.

I think I'd just be wanting to hear more of what I want to hear and as OneDay says (and I got impression when we spoke before in person) it wouldn't be what I want to hear really or for him to say.

I'm just frustrated I guess that I haven't got closure myself over it but then again it's quite a recent breakup.

Hmm, not sure I would go back there helloboys. All sounds a bit messy - it isn't like he hadn't messed you around before you said the things you shouldn't have.
Dippinmytoe, cleaning in the nude?! Wowsers, that is more shocking than the felcher!!
Lois I kept reading that with MRSA. Is he South African blossom?

I had my lunch date with my mrscottishaccent and it was lovely. Dunno why I was feeling so unenthusiastic about it. He came back to mine after while DS had his sleep. He is a very nice guy. He is coming over for pancakes weds and asked if I wanted to do something next sat, plus asked about a gig in April so who knows! A nice way to spend a rainy Friday afternoon!

Ah thats good polly :)

Yes nude cleaning. . Strange. . Could do with a cleaner , but no ! Most of the strange ones I found on okc.

I have never been on there - just soulmates, tastebuds and tinder. Met one guy from tinder (who weirdly knows mrscottishwedding) and dated one guy from soulmates for 2 months. Oh also been on my single friend pre DS and went on a few dates, but never fancied any of them.
Maybe if they had offered to clean my house naked...!!

Oh hello. Noones going to shoot you, but probably the best advice would be to not see him again then, if you know that you'd really be after a reconciliation, but dressing it up as an exit-interview type situation. It just seems a bit emotionally-masochistic, setting yourself up to get hurt some more and dragging it out. I think you hit it on the head that it's really recent - time heals.

If he wanted to get back with you, he'd make the effort to.

Oneday you know thinking rationally and not Panicky he really isn't the one for me. I'm just upset, feeling sorry for myself and wanting what I had. But it has to be be with the right person. I think I need to give myself eg a month to recover then back maybe start dating again. I just think the stuffings been knocked out Of me and I am being hard on myself. Doesn't help at my age when you think you won't meet anyone.

Is a month too soon to start?

Polly - that sounds really positive!

I haven't heard of ok Cupid, only on tinder & pof. Might have a little browse...x

Start whenever it feels right Hello. I waited, ooh, a day after my seven month OD relationship ended last year. It was a great distraction, really helped take my mind off it and give me a boost. Three months later I met the most wonderful man, still with him now. I'm 43 and he's 53 btw so not spring chickens.

Just want to say thanks to whoever recommended that 'Get The Guy' book. Just started reading it and I LOVE IT!

Jarlin you and me both re the wallowing and self pity! Any more wallowing and I'd be a hippo! in mud of course!

I'm also same re online dating did it half heartedly before cancelling the sites. The mood I'm in now is if when I'm out (friends birthday dinner tomorrow) if a perfectly nice man approaches me I'll run away....

I'll come join you both in your wallow if that's ok? Still gutted from last night, missing having someone to chat to. Messaged a couple of guys but lost interest almost immediately when they replied, can't face being set up for disappointment again yet. Going out with the girls tomorrow, can't even be bothered with talking to anyone. Still baffled, hate the bastards who just disappear for no reason.

Hi all..
Jarlin....i too rejoined pof this week. Mr 4 kept cancelling. He texts daily but lityle else so Ive ended it. Hes not happy but too bad.
This time on pof im nit displaying my pics. That way i get to message who Im interested in. Ive already started chatting to a lovely irish man who is very smart, witty and hot! He is keen to meet sooner rather than later and we have swapped numbers so watch this space!
Will catch up on personals tomorrow as only viewing MN on my phone tonight. Hope u are all ok.

I have to say on pof you have to sort through an awful lot of dross! When i click on the meet me function, for every yes, I click 50 no's!!
I was messaged by a man today who asked if i was interested in a moogamous FWB partnership! He claims his flash car can be at mine in no time! Tempting as it sounds (if i become desperate) i declined!!

MyChild I'm also loving the Matthew Hussey book! Some parts of it are a revelation tbh. In fact, I'm loving Matthew Hussey himself . The kindle book has videos at the end of some chapters and I love watching them as he's just gorgeous - fabulous arms, fit body, handsome, lovely voice - he's definitely my new crush! Thanks to Lizzie for recommending it .

Had a few drinks locally tonight and while I was out, Mr Coffee Shop sent a text - a truly crap one. It said (in reply to my text yesterday saying to get in touch when he's free and if I am too, we can sort something out): 'Ok. Hope you're ok. Had a very long day. x'. That was it. Haven't replied yet as I need to ponder on my response, so I'll reply tomorrow.

Is anyone finding Tinder a nightmare with regard to distances? A match messaged me earlier today and before replying I went to his profile to remind myself who I was replying to, and the distance suddenly changed from 20 miles to 77 miles in front of my very eyes. It's so annoying! They need to fix it.

Spoke too soon....sent irish guy a text and no reply. Just gone on pof and there he is. A sad case of caught a bigger fish! And me....a reminder of dont invest too much too soon!