Height difference: a tall order

[verticallyconfused]

What is the height difference between you and your OH? Do you ever think about it? Are you happy/does it bother you?

I know this sounds incredibly shallow, but my wonderful DP is only a few inches taller than me, and it seems to have the unsettling effect of sometimes making me feel awkwardly big, and more like a friend than a GF.

Has anyone else experienced this? Or am I just being ridiculous? He is loving, caring, concerned for my happiness and would do (pretty much) anything for me. We have fun together and I love him and can't really imagine not being with him.

I feel horribly selfish, if not just nuts, to be considering throwing away an otherwise great relationship over this - but every now and then it comes back to niggle at me.

We're young, healthy, live together but no DCs. Marriage is on the cards for sometime in the next few years.

Apologies now if I go quiet - busy day/weekend ahead. Would love to hear your thoughts. And any tips on how to get past this much appreciated.

I'm about 1.5/2 inches shorter than my husband. I like it! When I look at him we look each other in the eye. When we're asleep we fit together like spoons. In the car I don't have to adjust the seat and mirrors every time he's driven it... what's not to like?

I do know what you mean about the friends thing. Sometimes I've longed to be petite and have the feeling of being looked after by DH. However, in the long run, "friends" is not a bad thing at all. I wonder if this is really at the heart of your post IYSWIM.

There is one foot one inch height difference between me and dh I like it but I wouldn't give up a good relationship for it.

I'm 5'8" and my hubby is 6'2". To many though, the initial thoughts when seeing us together is not the 6" height difference, but the fact that he weighs more than twice what I do.

How does THAT make me feel? I don't feel disadvantaged in anyway. I don't feel like he's physically more powerful (although obviously he is). Because how he treats me, I feel powerful, probably more so than him actually.

In short see what I did there! it isn't physical size that plays the greatest part in how I feel when we're together, it's how he treats me and how valued and important I feel.

About an inch between us too. I find him quite short but only because I come from a family of tall men. Doesn't impact on our relationship though

How tall are you, OP?

I'm 5'10. At my height it's hard to find men taller than me, so I normally go for men at least the same height as me, or max half an inch shorter. However, you can't help who you fall for and my BF is pretty short. He isn't bothered by the height thing at all...in fact he has said he doesn't mind if I wear heels. I won't, however, because it does bother me.

I don't understand being bothered by it when your BF is taller than you, though.

More like a friend than a girlfriend?

Can you elaborate?

Do you feel that there should be a big-strong-man taking care of little-delicate-woman dynamic in a relationship?

Or is this feeling a symptom of a more general there is no romance problem?

DH is over a foot taller than me (I am 5'5", he is 6'6") I am a size 10, he is a huge rugby player. I am 9st, he is 22 stone of pure muscle.

I like how his hands fit around me. I like how he cuddles me and my face is in his chest. I like feeling small and protected. I have never feared his physical size; it makes me feel safe.

However, his behaviour and way he treats me makes me feel dominant, strong and powerful.

That's more important. How he makes you feel rather than how your size compares.

I've never been attracted to tall men. I wonder if it's a subconscious thing, worrying about having gargantuan offspring.

My DP is about 2" shorter than me . Doesn't really bother me. In an ideal world he'd be about six feet, and I'd be three stone thinner. I tend not to wear high heels round him, but I feel a bit meh about it tbh.

I'm 5ft and my DP is 6ft. However, he weighs 10 1/2 to 11st while I weigh 16st. Neither the height nor weight differences bother me, but I'm hard pushed to find a man who isn't at least 4-5inches taller.

OH is 6ft 5

I just about scrape 5ft 5.....

He tells me I'll be responsible for his crippled back in old age

DH is 16" taller than me, and at least five stone heavier. He gets double-takes on the street at the best of times, but even more so when we are together. We couldn't have "you may now kiss the bride" at our wedding because it would have looked ridiculous (we practised and that was the consensus). But I do like feeling relatively delicate even when I'm carrying baby weight etc.

My ex was two four inches taller than me and probably three a stone lighter. I couldn't wear heels and constantly felt huge and hippo like.

But although my physical trade-up has left me better off, I broke up with ex because he was a patronising, controlling arse, and got together with DH because he cares what I think and we make each other laugh.

Sod how you look in photos - what matters is whether the smiles are genuine.

my DP is the same height as me (5'6"). I'm attracted to tall men, so it took me a while to 'adjust', iyswim! However, now I like the fact that we can look at each other eye to eye.
I don't think I could date a man shorter than me, though.

MyChild I've thought that too!

I'm five nine and come from a family with super tall genes. Our Grandad was over six and half foot,myself and a couple of siblings are above average tall, and the generation below us, the older nephews, are already over six foot 4 and not even 19 yet.

I had children with a man who is five eight, quite short for a man, and his mother is under five foot. So there's def short genes on his side to counteract the tall genes on my side?

I'm still getting over the coincidence of all my boyfriends having exes of extraordinarily short stature of five one or less. Even the ones who didn't have exes, their crushes were on tinies.
My last boyfriend used to like calling me a tranny in public when I wore heels and makeup, because I was tall anyway and then added heels making me over six foot. That feeling of being unfeminine because I'm taller that average Has stuck with me. Fortunately my currently boyfriend is over six foot, and it certainly adds massively to his appeal. I like looking up to him, in all manner of ways.

DH & I are the same height at 5'10" & it doesn't bother either of us.

I am 6' and wear heel when out so wouldn't want to date anyone less than 6'4" to allow for no height difference when I wear heels. It's important to me to feel physically dominated. And big men tend to be much more confident and hence less aggressive around tall women so I couldn't deal with 'short man syndrome' .....

Saturn What a charmer your ex was!

We aw the same height

It's not a problem

Are

I'm 5'2" and DH is 6'2"... I really wish I was taller not quite as tall as him because he's very tall. But I sometimes feel we look a bit daft next to each other.

I honestly can't believe this thread. My DH is 2 inches shorter than me - has been for the last 15 years anyway. When we met - it never occurred to me (or him) not to have a relationship because of our relative heights. To us - it was utterly unimportant.

Oh - and yes I wear high heels when going out.

I'm three inches taller than DH. The ONLY thing I don't like about it is that he can't put his arm around my shoulders and mine around his waist when we're walking along, I always like walking like that with my taller ex. Otherwise it doesn't matter one jot.

I am 2" taller than DH. My first thought when I met him was 'he's cute, but too short'. I had always gone for tall guys before and they had always been dickheads. So, while ideally I'd like DH to be a little bit taller, and it does sometimes make me feel a bit self conscious, he is the best man I've ever met which is clearly more important than his height!