I cheated and now unsure who the father is!

[Bianca123]

Hello everyone, I'm new on mumsnet so please bear with me. Please do not judge me, I had an affair and now I'm unsure on who the father might be.

First date of my last period according to scan was 16th May, I slept with guy A on 31st May & guy B on 2nd June (2 days apart), my cycle is 30days. With guy A we used withdrawal/ pull out method while with guy B, no protection was used. I just need to know what the chances are of either of them being the dad? Please help!!

[YoureBeingASillyBilly]

Umm OP has stated that se is supporting her children with her salary. There is no indication that the state has any involvement in the upbringing of these children.

Near were you privately educated? Have you never used services provided by the tax payer?

[dozeydoris]

Lweji 's posts are a good summary.

[Offred]

It doesn't even matter really. EVERYONE in the uk is a citizen of the state, all people are taxpayers and all people benefit from the things those taxes provide. Fact is the vast majority of people over their lifetimes do not put in more than they take out because although income taxes on ordinary wages are quite high, we live in a capitalist economy which encourages low wages in order to create high profits meaning ordinary people mostly cannot afford to support themselves or pay taxes.

Logically if near's argument was true the birthrate would be higher and the uk wouldn't have one of the least generous benefits systems in Europe. Not to mention that in poorer countries the birthrate would be lower. She makes no sense. I fully support entitlement to benefits for vulnerable people and am totally against massive accumulation of personal wealth, which is in effect stealing from every other citizen. Anything else is utterly barbaric and I do wish ordinary people who have suffered and struggled to succeed would not kick everyone else using a repetition of the rhetoric which often caused them to have to struggle in the first place.

There is no evidence benefits are ruining anything about this country or a high or being exploited. Actually if we don't start having more children as an economy we are going to be fucked. As one of the richest economies in the world there is no evidence that, properly structured (I.e. If we stop bleeding money from the top rather than the bottom as there's no evidence of this) the economy couldn't support this.

[Offred]

Quite apart from any issues with contraception or this misplaced idea that it is possible to exercise perfect control over fertility at all.

[dozeydoris]

I don't think it is really the money - if I loved my DCs I wouldn't shag around randomly to teach anyone a lesson, kids need more than lurv, OP sounds very immature. Studying for a Masters somehow makes everything ok, can't believe the DCs are unaffected by the parents affairs and the fallout from that, but no doubt the OP will assure us there have been no untoward affects.

But you learn over the years that 'the kids aren't /weren't affected' comments often mean the parent is too self absorbed to know or too busy with their own stuff to notice.

The answer to OP's question was answered in the first few posts. Most people would know the answer anyway. I feel she is looking for assurance that she hasn't been a selfish loony.

[Offred]

She was asking who people thought the father was. As far as I can see she is more than aware, and if she understands the consequences, is more likely to be aware than Internet strangers, of the real effects of the instability of her relationship on her dc.

She however was not asking to be criticised and pilloried about her contraceptive choices or her income or her or her husband's respective affairs. She's 8 months pregnant, now is not the time for that. She needs to have the baby in peace and will have to deal with all of the rest of the things after, I don't see why people are so keen to have her publicly flogged at this stage of her pg, even if they feel she should be.

What makes things bad for children is how this stuff is handled and I think having snotty people judging their mum and angrily attacking them is only going to make things worse for them.

[ToffeeOwnsTheSausage]

I wish you and your children luck but this is definitely a case of apparent brains but no common sense.

[halfwildlingwoman]

Well, I think that's the first time I've seen the phrase "lax morals" on mumsnet. In fact, I think it's the first time I've seen outside of Victorian fiction. Nearthewindmill, I have visions of you like Mr Bumble, sending unmarried victims of rape to the work house while their children go to the baby farm, tutting at the feckless poor all the while.

[lalalonglegs]

Hi Bianca - I think you've behaved with real dignity on this thread despite some ill-iinformed goading. Good luck with the imminent birth and I hope you sort out this less than ideal situation in the long run and, in the short, can enjoy your new baby without too much stress.

[Katie1240]

Hi I’m in a similar situation. I had sex with one guy who fully ejaculated then had sex with another guy who pulled out a few days later. And I’m pregnant. Who is more likely to be the father?

[Bitcherama]

Nobody here can tell you. Get a DNA test.

[Mumoftwoinprimary]

More likely to be the one who ejaculated. But far from impossible to be the other one. You do indeed need a DNA test to know for sure.

[sundaysupperclub]

ZOMBIE THREAD.....6 YEARS OLD!!!!

Get over it all those who have got their knickers in a twist!

[Mumoftwoinprimary]

@sundaysupperclub

ZOMBIE THREAD.....6 YEARS OLD!!!!

Get over it all those who have got their knickers in a twist!

Katie1240 has asked a similar question.

[crestar]

@sundaysupperclub

ZOMBIE THREAD.....6 YEARS OLD!!!!

Get over it all those who have got their knickers in a twist!

Such a predictably, typical Mumsnet, boring comment.

WE ALL KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!

[Pinkyandthebrainz]

Oh dear, what a pickle.