Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Lovely new man-but heres the bad bit..

140 replies

memorylapse · 23/11/2013 19:06

met a nice guy on a dating site..after a few disastrous dates with others..we had a lot in common and I was attracted to him..he invited me out to see a band a few days lately and after a lovely evening..he walked me home..he is 46..he seperated from his wife last year who he was with for thirteen years..she was ten years younger....

He told me he fancied me and wanted to see me again..all looking good..he leaned in to kiss me then proceeded to kiss me like they did in the old black and white movies!..pursed lips..just kind of wiggled his head around..I couldnt really kiss him back because it just wasnt possible..it was completely weird..that last time I was kissed like that I was 14!

so is this a really bad sign..he wants me to go round tonight..but if he kisses me like that again I will scream..and Im really unsure about taking things further..which is a shame because I really liked him..but it was honestly like kissing a piece of cardboard..there was no response..just pursed lips..bit of a damp squid..but he seems really into me..

OP posts:
Vivacia · 23/11/2013 19:08

Can you just pull back, smile and ask, "can we try kissing like this..." and go in for a few slow little kisses until, er... his mouth magically opens??

DorrisM · 23/11/2013 19:09

I think you might be dating my ex husband grin

Casmama · 23/11/2013 19:10

He sounds nervous to me, maybe he is really out of practice. You could try holding his face and taking the advice above about slow kisses.

Giraffeseyelashes · 23/11/2013 19:11

Sorry, but I did snort at that. Let us know how the date goes and if there's any improvement.

CookieDoughKid · 23/11/2013 19:20

I'd give him the benefit of doubt i.e. he's not had much practise but i would be off putting to me. If you need to teach him the basics then what about the rest?!! :0

Original poster
memorylapse · 23/11/2013 19:21

Vivacia..I did exactly that..and he still did it..oh god..just my luck..I have been single for nearly two years since splitting from my husband after he had a three year long affair..looks like I might be single for a bit longer! DorrisM..what does he look like? Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
memorylapse · 23/11/2013 19:25

Cookie-that was my first thought..I figure if he has no idea how to actually kiss..and I dont mean..bad kisser..I mean..actually doesn't know how to..then it doesn't bode well in the bedroom Sad

OP posts:
maparole · 23/11/2013 19:30

Perhaps he was just being polite; not wanting to go too far?

BumgrapesofWrath · 23/11/2013 19:31

My ex boyfriend kissed like this! Terrible kisser, but excellent in bed, so maybe it's not a bad sign?

DorrisM · 23/11/2013 19:37

Well I married my ex and had been kissing him for over a year by the time I married him so I knew what I was getting but I thought that it was just a minor thing I could change, it wasn't. I tried suggesting we try it differently and he'd agree but it was just the same, so the only thing to do it to be a bit less subtle which isn't easy. I got to the point where he'd say 'you always say that, it make me feel bad' so I no choice but to put up and shut up or really hurt his feelings. I'm not sure I'd say it was the reason we split up, but it certainly contributed.

redundantandbitter · 23/11/2013 19:37

It was a first kiss. So nerves must have played they part.

My first kiss with ex was a bit weird, but def improved!!!!!! Worth a second visit?

Original poster
memorylapse · 23/11/2013 20:16

ok..am going round to see him..so will see what any further kissing is like!

OP posts:
redundantandbitter · 23/11/2013 20:20

Oooh enjoy. 2 months since I last kisses my ex... I completely and utterly miss his gorgeous lips. Sigh

Whatnext074 · 23/11/2013 20:41

Good luck memory and hope it improves, kissing is so important.

Your post made me so look forward to dating again Hmm

Chesntoots · 23/11/2013 20:43

I once went on a few dates with a bloke that opened and closed his mouth just like a fish. I shit you not. Terrible. Couldn't see him after the third time, thinking about kissing him made me shudder. I did try tilting me head, his head, telling him how I liked being kissed. Nothing. Nada.

I would just run for the hills...

Hogwash · 23/11/2013 23:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Whatnext074 · 23/11/2013 23:38

Blimey Hogwash!

springytickly · 23/11/2013 23:45

Sorry, couldn't get beyond a bad kisser

KrabbyPatty · 23/11/2013 23:50

Gah! why did I click on Hogwash's link?

Maybe he was being polite & it will improve.

Lol at damp squid. Grin That sounds horrid.

BearsBeetsBattlestarGalactica · 23/11/2013 23:50

Erm I know this isn't really the point but I couldn't help but notice that his ex was 12 and he was 22 when they started going out? Is that correct? Seems a bit off...

BearsBeetsBattlestarGalactica · 23/11/2013 23:52

Ahhh oops. I misread the ages.

Ignore me.

I hope the kissing improves for you, OP. Bad kisser would be a deal breaker for me though. I love a good snog Grin

redundantandbitter · 23/11/2013 23:56

hogwash that clip will haunt me - urgh. Just urgh.

EdieBlizzard · 23/11/2013 23:57

Think you may have miscounted bearsbeets !

EdieBlizzard · 23/11/2013 23:59

Sorry cross post - run for the hills OP!

AnAdventureInCakeAndWine · 24/11/2013 00:06

OP, watch the episode of Boston Legal called "Race Ipsa" (2.23)... Grin