The dating thread 65

[Queenofthedrivensnow]

No don't think u can hide it without upgrading Gaga. Glad you feeling ok about it all now. Pof for me is the best site I've found.

Super I got spots too!

Hmm. Texting. Men can think the same about texting.

Ultrafox was ill over the weekend, this morning she texted to say she was too sick to meet tonight. I replied saying its fine, maybe this weekend, and no response. I was checking my phone every twenty bloody minutes.

She did just text to say she's looking forward to it and say sorry again though.

Girlie - what is it about the date that's making you nervous? Is it the daytime element or the fact is date no 3?

Gaga - glad you're ok, hideously drunk is sometimes the best response to these things I find! Unfortunately you can't hide your profile on POF anymore unless you pay for the site and I'm not paying for a continual stream of messages from twats that simply say want 2 chat

Bant - disappointing about the date, but at least she's rescheduled. Good to know men do a bit of obsessive phone checking too!

Hormonal - I found a grey hair this morning yet also have a huge outbreak of spots, so bloody unfair!

Morning! I found on pof that a couple of the guys I found interesting mentally would mention in their profiles about not wanting a woman who's upgraded on pof. As they considered them serial daters or potential stalkers! I think I just removed my photo now and then when I got bored :-/

Hi super think both of those reasons are making me anxious, although am also looking forward to seeing him

I think 3rd date sort of feels like a pivotal one, like it has to go one way or the other iyswim?!

girlie, try and see it as just another date, if you can. Christmas shopping seems a bit much but a nice walk and lunch would be ok, wouldn't it? A daytime date seems more relaxed to me, tbh.

Glad she replied, bant.

We've set a date for Monday evening, dinner and drinks at a swanky pub near me. Just need to decide what to wear now! Trying not to get too excited about this but hard not to, especially when all the other people I was talking to have gone silent :-/

Had my second date with mr browneyes and I am really t

Ooops...starting to like him a lot. He's stand offish but it like a challenge to me. I think he bit scared of being hurt.

I could see myself falling though....staying at his Friday night

Hormonal - staying over is very exciting! Personally I always fall them for them as soon as we dtd...

Just - I'm so happy for you that you've finally got that date arranged! The what to wear dilemma is always an issue for me too. Mind you, with the number of first dates I've had this year I should be an expert by now!

Girlie - you wouldn't be at the third date if you didn't both like each other. Relax and enjoy it - lunch and nice walk afterwards sounds lovely, if it's cold you can cuddle up and get warm!

In the process of arranging tomorrow's date. I normally have a policy of not drinking on the first date but I'm feeling unusually nervous so I'm tempted to break my rule here. Any views on drinking / not drinking on the first date?

Super I've had dates where we've gone drinking on first date. I'm always shy until I have a few drinks and if I like them I have ended up doing the deed sooner than I intended. If I haven't liked them it's been a way to get through the date

Sorry not much help really.

And yes Super I'm worried I'm gonna get closer once we DTD, it makes you very vulnerable I think

Nothing wrong with one or two drinks on a first date super I usually end up driving, otherwise I would as just one or two takes the edge off my nervousness.

I don't think DTD necessarily make you more vulnerable as such, it's when it starts to mean more than just the act, if that makes sense
It's when you start to trust, and dare I say start to fall in love when you are at your most vulnerable, and blind

Hmmmm I usually drink on first dates but then I'm a bit of a lush

We were discussing dtd ''too early'' before weren't we. I think when things are right it doesn't really matter anyway. Yeah there is the problem with dtd making us (women) feel closer and therefore more vulnerable etc.....but again if it's right that doesn't matter. I guess the problem is if it's not right then dtd is just going to cloud your judgement. Eternal dilemma!

I have a bad feeling this date is going to be a disaster. I think I'm going to get a taxi and get drunk!

Dtd always clouds my judgement! But I have a friend who swears it's essential to do it very early on in relationships in case it's crap!

Quick update - will read thread tomorrow. Geeky just left. Seeing him again on Friday. Things going very well indeed.

Sounds good Dontcall

I'm like your friend as I have quite a high sex drive and I'm incredibly impatient so I usually jump straight in if I do like them. I think it only backfires if they not that into you as you get closer but they don't

I'm just checking in to say that I'm still reading the thread but that I haven't had any dates for a couple of weeks.

I'm not even really talking to anyone at the moment.

I've been contacted by a 29 year old who doesn't seem at all phased by the fact I'm 10 years older than him... Big issue for me though!

I was chatting with someone who's away on business this week so emails have been rather sporadic. He seems quite nice and we've talked about meeting up for coffee when he gets back. But I'm still not ruling him disappearing out before then!

I'm really busy in the run up to Christmas too so I don't really have the time for dating at the moment. I think the thing I'm finding is becoming really obvious is that I only really have alternate weekends and maybe one night in the week free anyway, which isn't really conducive to any sort of meaningful relationship!

My subscription ends at the end of December and, to be honest, I'm quite looking forward to that now. I would suspend the account before then, just in case, but I certainly won't be renewing it. :(

Pleased to read that other people are having some success... :)

Hi all,

I've been following your dating tales for a couple of weeks now and I thought I might as well join you ;-)

On OKC and GSM at the moment..... OKC has been good to me (got a six month relationship and a very close friend out of it) but guys there seem to be the same ones that I was looking at months ago. GSM going well, much more civilised (for now!).

So, currently talking to two guys... First one mentioned as a date horror that his date turned up to have a fuller figure than her pictures indicated.. wtf?! Very shallow comment to me so have ditched (he drives a Micra so no big loss lol ... kidding!)

Second guy I quite like, he's very polite but also makes cheeky comments which make me smile. Started messaging yesterday afternoon into the night. Really want to send a brief 'hey how's your day going' message but I think I'll play it cool for now. I'm away this weekend so we would only e able to meet in ten days... I hope he hasn't got bored and disappeared by then....

In my experience those dates where we have been messaging for a full week/ten days have gone so, so much better that the 'ok let's meet tomorrow' spur of the moment dates ... it's like if a stronger connection was established after talking for so long and therefore we're both more open for it to work iykwim? What do you all think?

Hey aknowing :)
I had a great date with a guy who messaged me one afternoon, spur of the moment kind of thing and we met for a drink after 3 hours. Nothing came of it (he really wanted sex haha!) but it was a great ego boost. Other guys would chat for weeks but my shifts would rule out any concrete plans but some didn't even seem to set a 'date night'. It's whatever you're comfortable with but IMO if you're interested then a date should be mentioned early on. I'm not (or wasn't) a pen pal service.

Oh and years ago when I was seriously online dating, I did have a guy saying he wouldn't date anyone over a size 12! He was an ex pro sportsman and my friends were horrified he said that...sex was good though but he'd let himself go! Haha! He had the personality of Gary Barlow - that's not a compliment btw ;)

Haha I agree re Gary Barlow ... he doesn't do anything for me either!! I think maybe it's because the longer you message the more likely their true self will come out.... like the guy I was messaging about a week ago; all perfectly nice, he was witty and charming etc etc .... until three days in he started to only be interested on how sensual I was in bed, how open to doing this and that etc etc; it saved me a wasted afternoon really as although not prude I don't like when they big things up like that, I just like it to let it happen...

Anyway ....nice guy hasn't messaged yet despite being online earlier. He has a busy job so maybe I should wait until early evening to see if he messages back? I wanted him to message me during the day as that would mean he's been thinking about me

Folk Girl I was wondering how you are, nice to hear from you. I'm at a similar point to you, I have a date tonight but I'm feeling very meh about it. Thinking it might be time to knock dating on the head for a while until I can muster up some enthusiasm for it again! Like you, I only have alternate weekends and one weeknight eve at a push. Very difficult to start a relationship like that.

Aknowing - Welcome! I've been 'chatting' to the guy I'm meeting tonight for about 10 days. I prefer to meet sooner as I think it's more of a let down if you've clicked in writing but then find it's not there in person!

I am not holding out any sort of hope for this eve! He's told me where we're going, it's right on the other side of town to me which will be an expensive taxi ride so I might have to stay sober after all. Sob!

Does anyone else feel a bit more pressure about being single at Christmas? I've got a few parties next month and as usual I will be the only single person in the group!

Welcome Aknowing!

YesSuper I agree about a let form after talking online awhile. I've had my hopes dashed too when I've met them n found no chemistry. Shame your feeling meh about your date, you never know it might be great when u get there!

Things going well with me and me browneyes. Went to his place last night and had a bit of a fumble was nice though and brought us a bit closer. He actually called me from work today that he's never done before. He's very dry and takes Micky out of me a bit but I like it as I can't do with guys who too nice in beginning. I think he's a little more educated than I am so am hoping that's not my downfall.

Roll on the weekend

Hello all, have a day date lined up for tomos with my smallfeet chap, feeing really nervous about it, not sure why really.

Mind you he has just sent a text in which he called me 'babe' not sure about that at all have only been out with him twice!!

So I think tomos is the deciding date, it will go one way or, ahem, another I suppose

Ooh staying over, hormonal! I like a bit of mickey taking, too, just gentle ribbing, so to speak, but I don't like it when they're too serious and can't handle you making fun of them!

Which way do you think you'd like it to go, girlie? Either way, you need to report back on his, er, feet... :D

aknowinggrin, asking about sex stuff in messages would be massive turn off for me. Hope niceguy messages soon. Hate seeing theye been online, the whole thing is so stalky, sometimes you'd rather not know!

thanks, sooper! We've been texting every day and the messages are coming more frequently now. He seems keen, and we seem to have similar senses of humour. Hopefully he won't be a massive let down in person!