Artsy I have an idea of something you can do today to start this moving on process.
Compile a 'pen profile' about yourself, either in list or spidergram form, with your name at the centre of it. And write down everything about you, who you are what makes you the unique you.
So, if looks are important to you include them, but don't just write pretty or beautiful, list the characteristics you think are your best "big brown eyes", "even teeth", "shiny hair" whatever.
Then list your traits, qualities, values, hobbies, interests e.g. likes reading, vegetarian, liberal political views, exercises regularly.
And don't just include the things you already are, but the things you aspire to be e.g. does voluntary work, speaks Mandarin, rock climbs, runs marathons.
Have you seen that advert about each of us having our real live selves and our online self, include your real life self, but also include your 'online self'; the characteristics you aspire to have. It's a way of validating who you already are and acknowledging what you aspire to be. Then when you look at your aspirations, you can begin to formulate 'SMART' targets to achieve them.
I did it, and it made a massive difference to how I feel about myself. Particularly when I look at some of my 'aspirations' that have now become my reality.
It's good for the self esteem and it raises confidence and you will become the best you that you can be.
It does sound from your posts that, until now, you have relied on your looks to get you a man. That's fine, but looks will only take you so far. What you need to do now, as you approach your 30s, is work on the whole package, the whole person. When you are looking for a man in their 20s for fun, yes they are going to only be interested in your looks, but as they get older and begin to think of settling down, they want more than that.