Waves is determined to keep winning now that Acrobat has arrived.

[wavesandsmiles]

So, Acrobat did actually arrive (only just) on the last thread. And he is here and lovely!

Links to previous threads:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/a1670597-So-DH-said

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1745551-DH-said-DH-left-waves-is-still-being-sick-but-into-the-third-timester

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/a1801734-Waves-is-winning-Here-comes-the-Acrobat

Tomorrow is another day, and hopefully and much better one for you waves. You know, the four of you make a fabulous family, and a tight group. That is a true gift. And you're right, nothing holds you there. I hope that means you are giving serious thought to moving away. A lovely fresh start for you and your brood, somewhere where there are young families for support, and like minded people for companionship. Good opportunities for your children as they grow up as well.

I think a new start on the mainland would be a really good move. Away from twunt, away from TB, new start with new people. I think you said before that you fancy Scotland. The UK courts & CSA may also be more helpful. You're doing really well honestly. This is really hard but there's only one way now & that is up.

It is hard now. Really hard. But I think that is partly the total lack of sleep, coupled with the grieving process really kicking in. C is a human feeding and poo machine, must have fed him 7 or 8 times today and done around 11 or 12 nappies. And on top there is a poor attempt to entertain the older 2, and finally managed to get them some lunch at 2.30. They got their own breakfast, being v helpful, but short on food just now (well, food that doesnt need defrosting) and so had to be a bit creative! Slice of bread in triangles, cucumber, a cold sausage, slice of salami and a warm veggie spring roll

Anyway, I booked flights so we all now have a break to look forward to. Will decide early next week where we stay. At least I don't really have much to pack in the way of baby things. I used my moby wrap at the fete yesterday and C was happy in it, and it was very comfy and practical so I guess we will take that as opposed to the pram thing which hasn't yet been out of my house (but is a useful spot for him to have a sleep in when I am downstairs!)

Just to say I didn't use prams until mine were 5-6 months, slings far more efficient!

I really hope the break gives you a bit of perspective and the strength to face the inevitable battles re divorce and maintenance. We all know you will get through this too.

Quick post: What about a house swap waves? You can do that on here ie MN has a house swap section...

Don't worry about food combinations. As long as they have enough to eat it doesn't matter what really. Mine are used to very strange combinations at times when I have messed up my food planning.

Equally you could do a list of what you have in the freezer and get the kids to remind you to get X out in the morning for tea.

It will get better Waves. Not today, or next week, but soon - a couple of months. Keep going.

Where are you going to stay, waves? Perhaps we could arrange a meet-up to welcome you!

I will keep going. Of course I will, it's what I do

Still shattered but tentatively excited about our short break in a few weeks time. DS1 and DD are hugely excited and talking packing lists already. We have no fast food places here and they are both desperate to go to subway! I think we will most likely stay at gatwick as from there we can catch local buses to nearby towns or maybe get the train to London or Brighton for a day out. Just being together in a room with a fully working tv and no housework to think about will be wonderful.

At a less emotionally stressful time I'd completely consider a house swap, but right now I would worry myself sick about cleanliness and lodgers so will go the budget hotel route instead.

I think the break will do us so much good. We need a bit of space from our regular surroundings to spend some quality time just being together instead of tip toeing round lodgers and getting stressed about chores.

I will have to make a decision next week on where to stay, but I think gatwick is the best as I don't want to hire a car and the transport from there seems great.

Goes without saying, I hope, that if anyone is in the area and would like to meet up then let me know

Please send sleepy vibes to us, I don't think I can manage another night with no sleep

Things will get better Waves, you have lovely children who will support, love and help you through this. I'm glad that Twunt is definitely consigned to the dustbin and your mother was always toxic - she ran over your foot! I think things will be better without her or at least with strict boundaries.

\

Aaaargh! Was going to do a complicated MN artwork thing composed of different things to represent a bucket filling up with sleepy vibes, but failed epically.

Still, the thought is the same.

dropped off my lists of 'on' threads.

Now arrived safely home after holiday, complete with new puppy!

hope everyone is doing well, can now go see Acrobat properly to drool over him and catch up on whats happening.

Argh missed your past few posts :( heading your way too as I head upstairs to dreamfeed DD.

I'm so glad you've booked your flights. You definitely do need a break and Horsham is a nice town you should be able to get to from Gatwick. I wouldn't bother catching the train to Croydon though

Having done this twice you do know that this is all a stage and this too will pass. It will get better, it will get better, it will get better - all of it.

Delurking to send you hugs and sleepy vibes. Have followed you for ages, quietly marvelling at how you have stood tall against all that has been come your way.

If I were in your shoes, I think I would be seriously thinking about moving to get a fresh start away from twunt & TB.

You are an amazing woman!

Hey Waves, I hope you have a good holiday.

Don't worry about your past - many of us have been there, honestly!

It is hard though, when you live in such a small community. When you think about it, all of us weren't the same people we were 20 years ago.

When are you going to make the big leap to the mainland? (or we can give you a warm welcome in NI)

Humming a lullaby here, Golden Slumbers, everyone join in.....

Seems to be some good Guest Houses in the area waves, some have a shuttle car to and from the airport which would help you. Have a look on Tripadvisor, some are handy for rail links and restaurants in a little nearby town.

Sweet dreams.

Sleepy vibes helped . I feel human again, after he did a couple of 3.5 hours sleeps overnight. Phew.

Yesterday's emotional state was not aided by the fact that Twunt came round with post from my old house and saw me in floods of tears. I think I need to properly properly detox now, I can't be seeing him at all. It makes me more upset, especially seeing him being so unremorseful and generally Mr Happy. He possibly lacks a soul.

Today I intend to just enjoy loving my super children and also do another recital as it is Sunday I think?!

Happy Sunday Waves

Sounds like C gave you a decent night's sleep, and we all know that just a couple of hours makes all the difference

What dates are your flights? PM me if twunt might still be reading your posts, I have a couple of ideas for you. Travelling up from the West Country is tricky, but not insurmountable, i like the idea of a meet up BIWI (i also desperately need some LC help but that is another story!)

Gatwick is v central, I know the area pretty well and can suggest a couple of cheap days out if you would like. I have free tickets to the aquarium at Brighton so will check when they expire and post to you.

The break is lovely to look forward to, and I really, really, hope you consider a Big Move to the mainland.

Don't forget to keep asking for RL help lovely, I know it is holiday season but people will assume that if you're not asking for anything you've got it covered. Sending you and and wishing you a joyous recital and a peaceful day.

You are a fabulous mum waves, doing an amazing job with your 3 DCs, a true inspiration to me.

Greetings waves so glad you got more zzzzzzzzzs!

Considering what you put up with, you are doung well to look ahead and plan.
That holiday will do you good - lovely for the older DCs anticipating a break.

Jax a new pup you are so lucky

You can face the world after a better night's sleep Have a lovely day with the DCs and at your recital :)

Will your house and lodgers be vulnerable if twunt knows you are away?

Get your post redirected by the post office so he has no reason to come round. Ignore how you feel about him seeing you upset. His opinion is worth nothing.

Hurray for sleepy vibes working!

Yes Brighton would be great for a day out (I used to live near there) & only 35 minutes on the train from Gatwick the aquarium is great (esp with free tickets!) I'm up in the hills 150 miles from there now but you are very welcome to visit!!