Dating thread 56 all welcome

[Kirstywirsty]

The Rules

1 Develop a thick skin;

1. Do not invest emotionally too soon;
2. It's all BS until it actually happens;
3. Trust your gut instinct;
4. If it is not fun, stop

Flipper I too want a plate explanation.

Bant it just doesn't sound like it worked, the age being the least of it. I applaud your initial willingness to spend more time together to check though, maybe she was just nervy and that brings out the worst. Personally I'm too inpatient for the benefit of the doubt.

It's to do with the crystal structure of the plate, I think. Some ceramics have trapped water molecules which get hot, others were dried more before glazing so the hydrogen-oxygen bonds aren't so common and don't get excited by the microwaves, so don't heat up

Or something

bant doesn't sound like a go-er to me .. I don't understand they lying about your age thing either .. You are what you are

Bant - you're right, 7 years is a bit ridiculous. But yes it just sounds like she's just not for you. And if someone irritates you on the first date, it probably won't get better in all honesty. No spark is one thing, but to actually annoy you isn't great

And the plate thing - ok I like this explanation. Flipper, can you confirm or deny? The plates I've got that do heat up are just cheap ones from ikea. I don't know if that's relevant but I thought I'd throw it out there. Maybe that's why they were cheap. There are only two left now. Ok I'm making myself sound a bit plate obsessed, I'll stop

winefiend I genuinely believe I'm going through a second childhood, my new neighbours teenage son knocked on the door the other night and asked me to turn the music down!! (I was suitably shamefaced and apologetic and all is good now).

Also doing middle-aged renditions of any girl group's songs of the last decade with the remote control as a microphone. Crap, I think I need a therapist .

Wembley is finishing his current job in two weeks.

Bant- she sounds a positive delight and joy to be around. Not. And that's before we get into shaving 7 years off. I wouldn't necessarily take shaving a year or two off your age as a red flag, but certainly a yellow one - I don't see the reasoning, because if you do end up dating and then in a relationship it has to come out, so why start off with a lie?

But 7 years IS a red flag.

Thanks, Bant. I think you would be quite reasonable to not see her again, actually, for any one of the reasons you've given. You think there might be a connection though? Really? Or is it just that the dating pool might be drying up a bit and you still fancy a paddle?

My (simplistic) understanding of how microwaves work: Almost everything has a fundamental frequency, at which it vibrates more easily. Water molecules vibrate at a similar frequency to that of the microwaves. So when microwaves get going around water molecules, the water molecules resonate with them and start vibrating, and all that jigging about makes them heat up. Plates don't have much water in them, so they don't heat up themselves, but will get hot if in contact with hot food. Theoretically, I reckon a cracker shouldn't heat up in the microwave, but I haven't tested this yet.

Please, someone correct me if i'm wrong. I'd hate to be responsible for misinformation.

Last time I went to the Science Museum, there was a microwave just like mine on display.

Yeah, Bant's right, it's all to do with excitation of water molecules.

Love a bit of physics, me.

Ah well, onwards and upwards.

I had a visitor to my profile last night. Not attractive so I won't look, but the major problem is the username.. 'Ainusil'.. I just keep looking at it and thinking 'haemorrhoids'..

Not a good feeling to give from a username

That's right flipper, from what I can recall. It's the oxygen-hydrogen chemical bonds that get excited specifically, and water has two of them (H2O) so that it gets hot and heats up anything around it. Other things will be affected too - alcohol being one of them (C2H5OH) possibly

So if you dip your cracker in vodka it should get warm. Dry, it won't

Also some metals are affected which is why there is a spark

I reserve the right to have misremembered all of this and be completely wrong, but I think that's the case.

I was stumbling around POF last night. Every now and again I look at male and female profiles just to see how different people do things, what they think will attract, how they word things. And I came across a woman's profile that actually made my jaw fall open.

She said she was 39. If she was a day under 46 she's had a VERY hard life (maybe related to Bant's latest squeeze?). No kids. Her profile text was more negative than positive but what shocked me was this:

"Will put up some better photos when I find some that don't make me look mad. Or like I'm a spastic"

For some reason, I'm pleased to have been able to post about chemistry and sparks on here, in a completely non-date related way

And why do only some metals spark? I had many unfortunate 'melting nutella with a bit of foil still on the jar' moments as a child so was as confused as heck recently when I opened the microwave door and I'd been heating something with a spoon still in it.

Toritlla it might be that the glaze is poorer quality, cracks and water can get in to the ceramic?

Good morning all, well my guy dumped me last night after I said I couldn't make it over to his, he said I haven't got any time for him - which is a fair point.

SO back to the drawing board, I can't find any new sites that actually have more than a handful of men in my area, it's quite depressing!!

qo - but if you didn't have time for him (and you say it was a fair point), are you likely to have time for any other man? Or were you just a bit "can't be bothered" with the guy?

Sorry, that sounds very blunt, but you know what I mean.

Kirsty not at the moment.

Yeah I liked him Jessica, but not enough to make the effort. I could have gone to his last night, I just didn't want to.

I have about one night a week free, some weekend nights and occassionally all weekend, which was enough for me as I really don't want to rush into anything. I think he wanted more

Qo maybe he's read "he's just not that into you" and is all empowered and shit . If someone couldn't be bothered to come over and see me I'd take the hint! It doesn't mean either of you is a bad person, you just want different things so better to call it quits.

oh yeah absolutely stranger, I spent all day yesterday trying to convince myself to like him more than I actually did, and trying to concince myself to go to his house. You shouldn't have to do that.

It's just that there's such a lack of decent, ok looking, solvent men in my area I really was trying my hardest to like him, as my mam kept convincing me you don't need hearts and fireworks and butterflies, and that I "hadn't given him a chance"

Qo - you can't make yourself fancy someone.

Well Pinkhat has winked at me again this morning. I think she's keen. Time for a mail, no spark etc.

She was interesting to talk to, we chatted for 3 hours but..
Saying 'lets be friends' is kind of dickish isn't it?

Bant - if you would like to see her again as friends, then say it. If not, then don't. There's nothing worse than saying that line if you don't mean it at all.

Qo well, sounds like that is all for the best as you really weren't sure about him. Next time though if you are feeling like that it's probably kinder to finish things earlier. Hope you're feeling okay about things as it can feel a bit strange when things have ended even if you weren't that into them.

Bant I think the friends text is fine if you mean it, but it sounds like she irritated you and that's not a good trait in a friend.

Need to eat my words about Alpha - he was emailing away yesterday but got them returned as undeliverable. Still nothing from College Bloke - have texted him and if he doesn't reply then that's enough of that. Feeling quite about old Alpha but need to rein it in.

I keep coming across people who say they've made friends via OD and personally I don't get it. Unless it's clear that you mutually don't fancy each other I think it's difficult. Otherwise what you're saying to someone is everything else is there, you want to give them some of your time but you never, ever want to see them naked because they repulse you [overly invested personal experience face].

I agree Stranger, I have in the past tried to be online friends with men who ( I thought) lived too far away for any RL contact, but it always became difficult when they insisted they'd travel to see me and it would have been to awkward to say the truth, ie that I just didnt fancy them