Dating thread 56 all welcome

[Kirstywirsty]

The Rules

1 Develop a thick skin;

1. Do not invest emotionally too soon;
2. It's all BS until it actually happens;
3. Trust your gut instinct;
4. If it is not fun, stop

Well, now you know you did attack someone and upset a few people, the decent thing to do would be to apologise to her

Not continue saying derogatory things about her style or her actions

I have only argued on here when I see someone unfairly attacked - twice as it happens. I will defend any sexism I see and I will defend people I feel are being bullied

I won't engage with childish yawns and oh dearie me's, they are there to inflame only

If one person takes issues with your manner it can be a clash of personalities, if more than one does - maybe you should look at your own self awareness and see what can be changed

I feel a bit like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day...

Ok I'm definitely going to bed now. Night all

Night tortilla

Fucking hell. All I posted was that torsos are a bit ick (for me) in OD profiles and wondered if 'cleavage' had the same effect. I honestly didn't mean it to start a riot. Thread, I'm sorry.

I hate confrontation. Really. I try to fence sit when things blow up, because I truly hate people fighting. I also think women do have an absolute right to wear what they want and that some less evolved men will take that as a green light to be obnoxious.

I have no time for the fighting and will not engage on either side. I don't think anyone should be banned, believing the thread to offer perspective, intelligent discussion and an occasional shoulder. I also believe that everyone deserves to put their opinion without personal attacks.

MLM it's good to hear from you, even under such sad circumstances. I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my mum to cancer when I was 23. As I was an only child to a single parent, it hurt more than I can articulate. I'm glad you're getting the help you need.

I had a mammogram today, so have been absent. (It was clear) Felt I had to apologise to you all for things kicking off, truly not my intention.

And cellophane, I heartily agree with your last comment. Maybe your friends should read it too.

But, I didn't attack anyone. I made a comment about photos, following on from my earlier ones about horses, and I was accused of being sexist and wanting to assault women.

I'm not going to apologise for anything.

Now either post about dating on here, or go form your own thread about how horrible people are. This thread is meant to be about dating and you've completely detailed it

moanranger

Can your friend sign up to different sites just to "see who is there"- i know match has a trial period where you can just have a profile up and your photo and have a look round and after about 2 weeks if you haven't paid they offer a "free 3 day trial"? (but remember to ring and cancel)

also she sounds very attractive but maybe choice of site will depend on what kind of man she herself would like to meet - someone posh too or someone with a degree or ...? eg I know some posh blokes who are happy to date women with not the same backgrounds" as long as they are attracted and get on?

My friends show great self awareness, I choose to be friends with people that do

We were talking about dating and still will, perceptions are an important part of dating

And you can't and won't tell me what to do or where to do it, open forum - open thread

Chortle. Did you not read those PMs?

lurking thanks for responding - she likes intelligent men. Her difficulty is probably geography plus limited pool of single men of her ilk. Match might be a bit too general, but I will suggest it to her.
Velvet I would like to be supportive& sorry that I have not responded specifically to you situation, but this off-topic trend I haven't followed so much. I could not form any kind of judgement as to why you have yet to meet anyone special especially without really knowing you in RL. I have never done OD & never want to as it commodifies human relationships, which I think is fundamentally wrong. I am a big fan of Meet Ups. So rather than say " oh, it's the men" or "oh, it's you" I would say maybe the problem is OD.
And when I make my case against OD, someone always comes back with the stories of that many happy relationships started that way, but it doesn't change my view.

snape my mum was also a single parent. I lost my dad to cancer when I was just 15months old. I know how hard it is.

yikes, I think the shit stirrers are gaining ground
I can hear the faint cackling of evils old hags

jeeze Louise...dont you people know that it is vitally important NOT to feed trolls!!

Watch out mercury, they'll get you banned..

no no I'll be ok...I Just need to surround myself in white light and wear my amethyst earrings :o

I had intended to pop back on here after a night out to catch up on dating chat but I'm disappointed to see that it's descended into arguments yet again. Unnecessarily so in my view.

I'm happy to re-iterate my support for velvet regarding dating, and it not being anything she does wrong at all. I'm also sure that bant is not sexist, meant no offence and actually I think some of his early comments have been either misunderstood or misrepresented. That said, he has bitten back when he probably shouldn't have done.

There is no need to "win" every online argument. It's ok to walk away and let someone else think they've "won" or had the last word. It doesn't mean you're weak.

Morn

Whoops

Morning all. Should we draw a line under last nights arguments and go back to dating?

Bill, you're right, of course, but its difficult not to react when you're the one in the firing line. Any news on Italian/moongirl?

Mercury, too much dungeons and dragons?

Snape, glad you're okay

yes, morning all.

Date day is confirmed with my rl date, next friday. Looking forward to it.

I feel like I threw in a hand grenade and walked away. I like this thread. It helps keep me sane during the drama of OD. I shall be sitting firmly on the fence and not commenting on the discussions. There's been so many posts that I have no idea how everyone is doing with dating.

I've started chatting with a nice guy but again he lives 2 hours away. Not an immense attraction from his photos but there's something. Going to Skype this week and see if I can persuade him to meet half way for a drink. Still totally ignored by pc arse. I so want to know why he just vanished. We got on really well and there was a clear physical attraction. I really really want to ask him :-(
.

Morning .. Still nada from MrNYC .. He does appear to have been on POF since Sunday . Is there any way to check ?

Doesn't appear to have been on POF !!

Broken - calm down, consider yourself soaked with a jug of cold water Seriously it's so unusual that there's a spark, I would probably look forward to it but just don't expect anything as would hate for you to come away feeling disappointed. Whereas if you expect nothing, anything better is a bonus.

Martini - dont bother with policeknobhead. I wouldn't give him tr ego boost of him knowing you're even still thinking about him. If you asked him he probably still wouldn't reply and you'd feel even worse that you had messaged again. You don't want someone that unreliable anyway. Bring on the next one!