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Original poster

Was it going too far?

195 replies

Copyright · 12/05/2006 12:48

Last saturday me and my partner took the kids (two boys aged 5 and 7) out to a museum.

Half way around DP announces that he needs the toilet, I told him it was on the way out so he tries rushing us around the museum and then says "I really need to go now, where is it?" so I told him and he runs off to use it.

Me and the boys continue walking around the museum and arrive at the toilets around 5 minutes later, DP is still in there. We have another walk around the Egyptian gallery and then make our way back to the toilets about 10 minutes later...DP is STILL in there. We wait around the toilets for another 10 minutes, the kids are getting bored and starting to play up...DP is still in there...

After a while the boys start knocking on the door telling him to hurry up, he ignores them...my youngest then tries the handle to make sure he is actually in there and DP tells him to get away....10 minutes later the boys start saying things to him through the door such as "hope you're not making it stink" and "other people need to use the toilet you know..." and then they make a little song that went "Daves on the toilet for hours and hours, he makes it smell, he makes it pong..." etc!

I let them carry on because:

a) I was annoyed with DP for spending so long on the toilet everytime he goes.
b) I was annoyed with DP for eating so much crap meaning he would be stuck on the toilet for ages
c) I was annoyed because the boys were playing up (before they started tormenting DP!) and I always seem to be stuck looking daft
d) I was bored! we'd been stood there waiting for over half an hour and couldnt go anywhere else without him.
e) I felt he'd spoilt the museum trip.

When DP came out he was furious and said that the boys had embarrassed him acting up like that in a public place...was I in the wrong?

OP posts:
QE · 20/05/2006 13:17

"restrictions on the bathroom" - like what exactly?

an ejector seat which activates 10 minutes after the door closes?

2mum · 20/05/2006 13:19

Oh for gods sake, his toilet habits are his business. A lot of men and im sure a lot of women also spend ages in the loo. Its hardly crime of the century, are you going to ruin this relationship over your obsessiveness of your partners toilet habits and time in the toilet.

2mum · 20/05/2006 13:21

Plus nobodys poo smells of roses, i cant believe you kept a diary of the smell? This has to be a joke

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 20/05/2006 13:23

I think you are taking the piss.

sallystrawberry · 20/05/2006 13:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2mum · 20/05/2006 13:27

Grin exactly!

Original poster
Copyright · 20/05/2006 13:31

The restrictions on the bathroom would be that he had no longer than 10 minutes to do his business and then I would go in with a camera or something, I took the lock off the door this morning to make him a little uneasy about taking so long.

The only reason I kept a diary of the snell was because his smells like sewage fumes, worse than anything I have ever smelt before, yesterday the whole house stunk when he had finished and then he went in a massive strop and broke the kitchen door by slamming it so hard just because the kids followed him around with air freshener for a while, he said it was staining his clothes when they kept spraying him Angry, it doesnt matter when the rest of us have to live amongst toxic fumes though Angry

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 20/05/2006 13:32

Leave him alone before he divorces you on the grounds of your being an interfeing wierdo.

hunkermonkee · 20/05/2006 13:32

That is seriously weird.

If this isn't a wind-up, I think you might need to get some help too, CR. Honestly, this is barking behaviour.

hunkermonkee · 20/05/2006 13:32

Are you actually trying to get him to leave you?

zippitippitoes · 20/05/2006 13:33

pmsl

it's a smellovision video diary you're keeping is it..

you are mad as a mad thing

SoupDragon · 20/05/2006 13:34

You're either a troll, a changeling having a laugh or about to be a single parent.

sallystrawberry · 20/05/2006 13:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2mum · 20/05/2006 13:34

If i was him id leave, you and the kids are driving him round the bend. Leave the poor man alone will you?

Xavielli · 20/05/2006 13:56

only a troll would post angrily after reading most of the comments on this thread

tribpot · 20/05/2006 15:12

I think you're letting him off too lightly. I suggest you get him to poo in front of you ensure it's done correctly, and then you can examine the quantity and consistency of the output once he's done. Also you can take a photo to put in your poo diary.

On a serious note, if you are not insane or a troll or both, and are trying to 'shame' your husband into getting help for IBS, you might want to try talking to your GP about it, make sure he is getting plenty of fresh fruit and veg in his diet, drinks lots of water and look at cutting out wheat/dairy to see if that improves the symptoms.

If he's constipated, suggest he uses a stool softener, there's various things you can buy over the counter. My dh uses Movicol on prescription, which is very effective.

TheLadyVanishes · 20/05/2006 21:59

ffs you went to his mother and BROTHER!!! do you also make him eat all his dinner before he can go out and play!. You are treating him as a child and do you seriously expect sympathy or understanding from anyone here?

Get yourself a life

Hoopoe · 20/05/2006 22:15

ohmigod!!! he'll take even longer to have a bowel movement now. if someone timed my loaf-pinching activities i'd get constipated. poor guy!!! Blush

i think you should let him have his own time. he's probably retreating there to get away from you and the kids!! Blush

lemonstartree · 20/05/2006 22:17

sorry , but I am with the others. you ARE mad!

morningpaper · 20/05/2006 22:24

I agree, you sound a bit mad.

However I did wonder (before your poo-diary posts) whether he might have an anal fissure? It can cause unbearable pain when pooing.

Frankly he needs to see a Doctor.

Turquoise · 20/05/2006 22:37

Sorry, but crying with laughter at the latest update.
This must be a pisstake.

bosscat · 20/05/2006 22:52

My DH would have left me by now if I'd have embarrassed him like this. Leave him alone, there are few things in life you can do in peace, poo is one of them.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 21/05/2006 00:23

Well, do you not know where sewage fumes originate from CR?

You are having a laugh.

beetle73 · 21/05/2006 00:25

Yes, I think a few marks may have been overstepped here CR, but I really, really do sympathise with how irritating it is.

Original poster
Copyright · 21/05/2006 10:07

It's obvious that none of you have had to suffer like me and the kids, I get up in a morning and the bedroom stinks through his farting all night, I get the kids ready for school and he sneaks into the bathroom and spends ages making the place stink knowing that I can't get the kids ready for school without the bathroom, I finally manage to get the kids to school, come home and the entire house stinks like rotten eggs, all he can say is "sorry..." Angry god I could kill him. People actually come to my house like my parents and the first thing they say when they come in the house is "urgh what's that smell?" thinking we have drain problems or something.

Anyway Ive told him the new restrictions, if he doesnt like it he can go to the park to use the public toilets. He's allowed 10 minutes at the very most to use the toilet as he has to realise that the bathroom is needed by everyone, not just him. He then has to get rid of the smell himself before he opens the door (which is included into his 10 minutes) and he also has to go out and buy one of those plug in air fresherners for every room of the house which should cost him around £35.

Whoever said punch him in the stomach, I did that this morning as I'm so sick of him, he was stood there with a sour look on his face, I asked him what was up and he hinted that he had stomach ache AngryAngryAngry and I just lost it and whacked him right in the belly and told him the toilet was out of bounds as DS was in the bath and Id told him to take his time.

Ill let you know how we get on, Im seriously considering leaving him, he disgusts me.

OP posts:
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