Dating thread no 49

[JulietteMontague]

All daters welcome here.

I'm sure he's well aware of the risks and i do tell him he's being really reckless.

Maybe it is an age thing because I'm 31 and i had the safe sex message well drummed in to me when i was young. He's 47 so there may be something in that.

I'd say that was true rainy as that age group is apparently the one where STI's are spreading fastest now. I saw an article about it somewhere not long ago.

You're close to the same age as me where it was constantly drummed into me at every turn

I agree with comments about condoms being a generational thing. Back in the day they were used if you weren't on the pill. I guess old habits die hard.

Seems like my date has bottled out. This is why I don't normally OD and I was fairly sure that if it had gone ahead I wouldn't have fancied him anyway.

Well if my ex's stories are true i can see where that's coming from.

I'm another condom disliker but there's no way I will be having sex with someone new without one. Recently I've had dealings at work with patients with syphillis for the first time in my career, never really known it to occur before, that kind of thing makes you a little , ya know, wary because I'm not sure I could work the 'no nose' look.

On willy wilt, it used to happen on a semi ( geddit) regular basis with Spud but that's because he'd fret it was going to happen, thus causing it to happen.
He also didn't like being put in a position where he was suddenly 'expected' to perform, as I found to my cost when he came home for lunch and I went all fellatrix on his ass.

( I love the word 'fellatrix' , fact I was going to call myself Fellatrix Potter on here but decided to rein myself in )

Kin that's something I liked about BC so much. Always ready... only had to look at him a certain way and ping! ready. Hahaa

and :( at the syphilis patients

I don't like condoms either but would use them unless i was in an established relationship.

I'm getting a bit excited about my date tomorrow. He's more nervous than i am, I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. I'm really hoping he is nice because i may be a bit emotionally involved already.

Those of you who are au fait with the safe sex message, do you always use condoms for oral sex too?

Rainy I know it's easier said than done but remember the Rules.

Lubey sorry to make you remember BC.

(I'm hoping for a 'pinger' next time.)

That would be a no for me. It's been a long time since i was last single though so i haven't done that for a long time. I know you should really.

Kin it's ok I am remembering it fondly... siiigh... seeing him in June, I can wait... tis worth it!

Choochoo no I have to say I'm not that much of a safe sex person that I would use them or dental dams for oral. Just PIV.

Actually Rainy that sounded a bit harsh when I didn't mean it to sound that way at all, what I meant (and this is because I'm prone to ridiculous 'happy ever after' thoughts before I meet someone) is don't like him too much beforehand, that way you've less chance of disappointment.

Oooh we haven't put those rules on this thread yet have we. brb

1. Develop a thick skin;
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon;
3. It's all BS until it actually happens;
4. Trust your gut instinct;
5. If it is not fun, stop.

That's ok kin i knew what you meant.

Nah, '*Choochoo' I wouldn't use condoms for oral sex either, imagine that taste - ewwww (also not keen on the aesthetics of a penis looking like a cheap, shiny sausage).

I might make different choices if I had a compromised immune system or had open wounds in my mouth or if the man in question had health issues.

I do not exactly practise safe sex . Although Mr Nice and I between us in total have had sex with three people (ie our respective exes and each other) and we are both fine in an STD way.

Thanks Lubey
I've actually saved the Rules onto my phone, and read them when I'm getting a bit daft.

I was just thinking about what Kin said. The circumstances in which I would that is (use protection for oral)

I haven't ever used a condom for oral sex. Would feel strange.

I probably just wouldn't have it if either of us had open wounds I suppose.

I have them saved too Kin. I think I have all the rules totally nailed apart from maybe 3, as I do tend to believe things are actually happening (like the Scottish guy who was going to come down to local hotel)

I haven't used condoms for oral sex either and agree the thought of it is pretty revolting.

But thinking about it, it's not very safe is it? I read something recently about cancers (other than cervical cancer) caused by HPV and think oral and throat cancers are on the rise because of HPV passed on by oral sex.

rainy is your date with the man who's been pushing your boundaries? Please be careful if so.

Yeah choochoo... I suppose I figure as a smoker I'm putting my mouth at all kinds of risk anyway so sod it. I also keep an eye on my mouth and throat a bit more because of the smoking.

Ah who am I kidding? (myself, duh) there's no excuse really I just suppose we all do our own version of a risk assessment and decide from there... there is an inbuilt thing I just can't get past with PIV and condoms though. It just isn't an option to not use one at first at least.

A friend of mine has had chlamydia twelve times in ten years and that makes me feel a bit ill. (and judgey, sorry)

Yes it is and i will. He's been perfectly polite since i told him. to stop. I'm hoping he just got a bit over excited. He's not annoying me anymore either.