Engagement ring

[milkybar28]

I'm looking for advice on engagement rings and hope the learned ladies of Mumsnet can help.

I should start by explaining that I'm a 28 year old man who has devoured the talk boards, in particular AIBU and relationships for a number of years. I am not a parent (or a troll!) but began reading out of curiosity after a story in the Times. The trials and tribulations, sometimes hilarious, sometimes shocking stories and invaluable advice offered, taken and ignored have fascinated and truly educated me over the years. I am proud to say I consider myself a feminist, in no small part because of the education I have received on here. I'm also sad to say that some of the stories have made me truly ashamed to be a member of the male sex.

But now to business! After a number of short and long term relationships I have finally met the woman I wish to spend the rest of my life with. We met in July and moved in together in November and we both know that this is "the one".
I am considering proposing at the end of the year because I don't want to wait any longer before committing to the one I love. By October and a planned holiday abroad I will have saved around £2,200 for a ring.

Do we think this is enough, or as I suspect, I should wait to save a little more?

For the sake of clarity I earn £40,000 a year, my girlfriend is not materialistic, and I can save around £100 a month. I know that many will say the price doesn't matter and of course I know this but we live in the real world and I want to give my true love a suitable token of my feelings. The old adage of 1 months salary would mean a ring worth £2,500.

So we saw a few rings on Saturday and the one I've chosen is the one she loved the most and (less importantly!) my favourite. However she doesn't know that I've bought it and we looked at quite a few. Both times we've been shopping it's been under the auspices of "just looking for inspiration" rather than a specific shopping trip, in order to keep at least some element of a surprise when I find the right one and propose.

Initially I was going to choose completely on my own but she does have a particular style and in the end I decided to go with something I know she will love- perhaps less impressively romantic but at least I know it's right!

So I have the ring that I know she'll love but she's still in the dark - meaning the proposal is certainly not just academic! (Obviously I'm aware that as an intelligent woman she has probably far more of an inkling than I realise but a surprise can be just as wonderful even if it's expected :-)

Next hurdle- our parents meet for the first time on Friday! Fingers firmly crossed it goes well........otherwise I may be looking to sell a lovely 1930's cluster ring!

£2.2k on a ring? I'd dump you for being daft with money!

Just kidding, hope it all works out for you :)

Was just skipping to the end to say if your girl is into car boot sales she will love an antique. Mine is from Grays in London. I think antique diamonds are so beautiful... Congrats x

Congratulations. I haven't read the whole thread (which is naughty I know). I spent a few sheckles myself on my wife's rings. It sounds like you've played a blinder and she's gonna love it. Get the ring appraised once you've bought it and check the terms of your insurance policy. We have three of my wife's rings as 'specified items' which means they're covered separately (as they're above the single item limit). They're also covered away from home. If you've picked anything tasty - and it sounds as if you have - make sure the insurance company will offer you a like-for-like replacement, or prefferably cash. Many insurers simply offer vouchers for highstreet jewellers, which would be as much use to us as clubcard points.

Let's hope she doesn't lose it, but if you do, it's best to know it's covered.

How lovely, let us know how it goes!

My engagement ring is for £200 which I think is about right for an engagement ring. The most important thing was that my fiancé chose it because he liked it and it felt right for me and I loved it too.

Perhaps a little more would be spent on the wedding ring, but not a drastic amount more either. It's about the sentiment, not the price in my opinion.

Oh but yes, it's lovely you are willing to spend this amount and choose something your fiancé really would love, by the way.

Just noticed you have already bought it. Glad she had some say in it. I didn't mind not having a say in it and I stated this in the past, but a lot of woman like to be there to pick it.

I hope it goes well with both your parents meeting for the first time. Sounds very nerve racking!

I wouldnt expect a £4K ring from someone on a £40K salary. To be fair, I wouldn't expect anything but £2200 is plenty for a beautiful ring, she will be over the moon, lucky girl!

I suggest proposing with a joke ring and then choosingdesigning together as she has unique taste. If you knew she'd like your standard solitaire then thats one thing but if she has a certain style then you could get it hideously wrong.

Congratulations!

Oh, another thread where i've not read it all and everythings done and dusted! Hope it all goes well with the parents and the proposal, do update later!

Why don't you buy her a top notch diamond and give it to her, saying she can design the ring?

My advice not having read any of the thread yet and being an ex jeweller is to get a second hand ring.
Diamonds like cars and electronics lose about half their value the minutr you leave the shop.
You could get her a ring probably worth about 6 grand for 2.5k.

Milkybar in future frequent auction houses in particular the good quality ones like Bonhams this is where I have acquired all my balbles. Pick the right pieces you end up with pieces that are a fraction of retail price. Me I love art nouveau stuff.

Ooh this is exciting! How did the parents meet up go?

Lovely thread!! As you now have budget to spare, have a look at Anya Hindmarch. DH bought me a beautiful, timeless clutch bag with our wedding date inscribed on the clasp and my name on the other side. How about inscribing 'marry me?' And putting the ring inside the bag???

this is mine (they've gone up a lot in price!!) but I'm sure you could do something similar.

Just wanted to say good luck!! :-)

She said Yes :-)

Thanks to everyone for their advice, so greatly appreciated and your wisdom made a terrifying job much easier.

Now to plan the wedding.....!

Hooray!

Congratulations!!!

Yay! Congratulations!!

Now, when's the date?? We need to buy our hats!

congratulations!

I wish we'd bought 2nd hand. We 'only' spent 1k but went to a high St jeweller knowing nothing about jewellery.

only now I realise how dark my diamonds are. We could have gotten such a better deal.

Congratulations!

It sounds like she's a lucky woman.

We need details, though. We are women.

Congratulations?

But I'm sorry, as an update that simply won't do. Details! We need details!

She's a lucky lady!!!!
:) congratulations

Congratulations !