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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dating Thread 43

999 replies

WarmFuzzyFun · 23/02/2013 17:27

Here it is...

OP posts:
ike1 · 25/02/2013 20:41

48 it sure is a personality change! But thinking on it he did have a propensity to sleep with his mates' girlfriends when he was single. He lacked alot of confidence when I met him. I feel a bit like I have nurtured frankensteins monster sometimes..

Snapespeare · 25/02/2013 20:42

I like nameless. We've been texting about books and chocolate penguins. I am going to be really pissed off if this goes tits up. Hmm everyone concentrate really very hard for date six.

Concentrate!!!

McBuckers · 25/02/2013 20:43

I signed up to Match.com 2 days ago and immediately seemed to hit it off with someone, sending jokey messages etc. Today he sends a message saying "Can we forget the small talk and pubs etc I want to have a long term relationship with someone like you but I really want to have sex with you, you can come here or I'll come to you".

I was so shocked, I've just come out of an eleven year relationship, have three children (one just nine months) and this is my first experience of Internet dating.

Is this what it's like now or have I just come across a rare tosser?

And just to put me under pressure my 6yr old daughter announced that she wants a step dad for her birthday!!!!!

Snapespeare · 25/02/2013 20:51

I'm afraid that's generally how it is. Even more ridiculous, some women might actually get taken in by that bullshit.

ike1 · 25/02/2013 20:53

Bloody hell McB he couldnt even managed to do the small talk until the first date ...good grief!

MirandaWest · 25/02/2013 20:55

I have everything crossed for you Snape - chocolate penguins sound great :)

I need food. And to write mystery shopping reports Hmm

KinNora · 25/02/2013 20:56

Brief input from my sick bed -

flicks the v's at Ike's ex
admires Lubey's frock
psychically demands Fate delivers Snape's date número six
goes 'awwwww' at LM & R&R and Cuthbert
says hello to everyone

takes more drugs.

ike1 · 25/02/2013 20:59

Oh dear wassup Kin you missing the homeland?

Bant · 25/02/2013 21:09

McBuckers
Honestly, we're not all like that. OWW and Snape and others on here have had to do some weeding, but there are nice blokes out there. It's just that some people will pretend to be funny and charming and decent, you've got to wait until you've met them more than once to work out who's a knob and who's not. And grow a thick skin. It's like going out in real life, you'll get the occasional tosser talking to you, but being behind a keyboard can make people act more tossy than they would be in person

lubeybooby · 25/02/2013 21:09

Thank you re: dress

Snape... I'm concentrating, really really hard. I will do for five mins after posting this too, just to be sure.

McBuckers nothing shocks me any more on these sites. Shame if he seemed a decent guy to start with, they usually do and then WOAAAAAAAAH here comes the crazy/baaaaaaaaad/etc.

lubeybooby · 25/02/2013 21:10

concentrating snape date six date six date six come on snape date six, c'mon nameless sort that date six date six date six

ike1 · 25/02/2013 21:15

Soz Snape My powers of concentaration are less than zero today...but I have no doubt you will have the 6th date!

Snapespeare · 25/02/2013 21:23

Hmm at ike no date six here as yet. i wonder why

JulietteMontague · 25/02/2013 21:33

Snape it's going to go well. You two have great communication, fun, book lists and penguins, it all sounds great. Date 6 will be soon.

Kin hope you feel much better soon.

Lubey yay for new date dress which is very important

McBuckers there are a lot of knobbers out there, and some genuinely nice men it just takes time to work out who is what.

ike1 · 25/02/2013 21:37

I know Snape there's always one and its usually an Aquarian...

Snapespeare · 25/02/2013 21:43

Grin it had to be an Aquarian.. Never do what we're asked told asked! Wink

Ugh. I want to lick every single inch of him. Blush am going to bed with my phone on top of my wardrobe, so it is too out-of-reach to impart this information.

VelvetSpoon · 25/02/2013 21:46

Snape if Cuthbert and I (who have practically no communication) can get to date 6, then it simply HAS to happen for you and Nameless :)

ike1 · 25/02/2013 21:50

Honestly now Snape why do you guys not say at the end of the date see you such and such day...I suppose I dont understand this sort of stalemate situ...

ike1 · 25/02/2013 21:51

Is it because of his fluctuating energy levels do you think?

Snapespeare · 25/02/2013 22:00

Oh I don't get it either ike I guess so... It's extremely frustrating in a way I can't work out if I would rather have plans that get called off because he's beat, as opp to no plans at all... But I guess that would get annoying after a bit. Maybe. I'm kind of happy to fit around his energy levels...but I'll still plan other stuff...I'm not at the point where I am waiting for him to feel ok before I arrange my enter life Hmm ...And he rests up if he knows he is going to be fucked to within an inch of his life has a busy day and then plans a rest day either side.

I've never been the type of person to set much store in being 'taken' Hmm places. It felt really nice to be out with him last week, because it was a bit smiley-sunny to be out with him in public, holding hands and for people to think of us as a couple. Blush on 99 levels that shouldn't matter shit... But it was still really very nice. I can go dancing, theatre, pub etc with my mates. I can curl up in a strokey/kissy/shaggy heap with him...

Gah! Date six! Come ON! Grrrrrrr!

ChooChooLaverne · 25/02/2013 22:07

snape I think he really likes you. Maybe he just wants you to make all the plans.

McBuckers yuk. Does he expect you to say yes?!

Velvet sounds like Cuthbert is making an effort with the communication?

ike any joy with the eye bag concealer?

I have to say I've been a bit taken aback by my veeeery brief experience of online dating. I've been lurking on here for a while and have been looking at profiles mostly with a sense of horror before I actually got round to filling in my profile, not expecting very much. But after my very nice first date with lovely man on Saturday he's emailed me to arrange another date and does seem genuinely lovely. I wasn't sure if there was a spark when I met him but I think that was probably more my lack of self-confidence because I assumed that he didn't like me like that rather than how I saw him. But when I saw he'd emailed I've come over all funny and he paid me a lovely compliment that hints that he could possibly see me as more than just a friend

VelvetSpoon · 25/02/2013 22:09

I never arrange anything with Cuthbert at the end of dates either. Would be nice if we did, though there is a sort of emerging pattern that I will see him on Fridays if he's free...other than that due to work and DC we're a bit limited of course.

Flipper924 · 25/02/2013 22:19

Am concentrating, Snape, it means I can't think about the fact that I have nothing treat-like to snack on. I'm not a big fan of dieting, but a bit of justified comfort eating has taken it's toll.

Yay for dress, Lubey. Hope you have cause to wear it soon.

Sorry you're poorly, Nora.

Ike, nice of your ex to remind you why you're better off without him.

All else sounds reasonably positive, I shall hope some of this rubs off on me.

Scrazy · 25/02/2013 22:20

Choochoo, it's quite possible that you have struck lucky first time. I hope so, enjoy your second date.

48howdidthathappen · 25/02/2013 22:35

I never arrange anything with Mr R&R, I think he finds it a bit odd, but goes with the flow. I may ask him if he would prefer to plan in advance. I would be a little disappointed as like him texting to ask when he can see me. I have asked him three times first now as feel its a tad selfish of me.

He has also asked if he can come with me to see my horses, I have always put him off. Going to ask if he wants to this weekend. Got to let him into the rest of my life.

6th date on order snape