Dating Thread 43

[WarmFuzzyFun]

Here it is...

Wow. What a tosser. You could have been in the bath, your mobile battery could be dead, just because you didn't respond in 60 minutes?

Ok I retract my last post. This is the mayor of red flag city. I'd be tempted to respond with something along the lines of 'just got your three texts, nice to know I've been dumped because my battery was dead for an hour. Good luck in the future'

Or something

In other news I see that POF has made searching for an intimate encounter only available to paid members. Wonder how popular that will be? Dunno how frequently used it was or how genuine most of the IE profiles tended to be.

Hello, please can I join your thread I signed up to Match last night.

Feels very weird getting back into dating after 11years.

Any tips?

mischi fucking HELL! Run! Save yourself!!

eternal the POWAH of my VAGINAAAAH salutes you! Just worked out that it's said in a fat-bastard-from-Austin-powers voice. :-) I've been very good today regarding enigmatic insouciance. Suspect nameless hasn't noticed....

Oh voice, that isn't good.

Means the 'dating' one will get flooded with IE people even more than it already is. When previously at least they were able to be honest about they wanted without having to pay.

Hello McBuckers.

God, we have endless tips between us I think.

Mine are not to get too carried away with talking online etc.... meeting in person can change everything so get that done reasonably quick

Also stick to an hour max for coffee and have a get out excuse ready just in case, so you don't waste too much time if they are awful.

It's likely you'll need those two in the early days until you get to more easily spot the way people disguise things (soft focus pics, not smiling, no pics with friends, only overhead pics, etc)

Voice I suspect the POF intimate encounter search thing may only apply to men?

That would bring them in line with the 'business model' used by the casual hook up sites.

IE free for women but men have to pay, there are about 10 men for every woman on there, the men are led to believe that there are lots of women looking for a casual shag with anyone who offers.
The reality is that even if they are looking for NSA most, if not all, the women will be very fussy and will make the men jump through hoops before even agreeing to meet them for a chat.

Voice, how did you discover this .

Snape oh he will notice. Eventually. Then you can be all, eh no vair busy

Voice IE paid only? part of me thinks that's a good idea to stop the fishing, the other

Mercury how do you work out which IE men are ok, just wondering how you sort them.

Scrazy - the forums. And the fact that I hit the search button, from where to normally select the Advanced Search, and there was a headline thingy telling me.

Well hello all - am back from date no 1!
Mischi - sounds like you might be better off, eek, scary behaviour after date 1!
McBuckers - welcome, i'm new to this and OD and had some very helpful advise from everyone on here. Most importantly to get the first meeting out of the way if you feel there is an initial spark!
So.... date no. 1 done - it was fine, he'd def put some 'favourable' pictures on his profile! but it was fine - we had a coffee, then decided to have lunch and a drink after - my concern with this was that I think he might become a bit full on. It doesn;t seem that he has much outside of work (as a sports centre manager) and he also is a personal trainer...I mean, he talks about his clients and his work but hasn't really mentioned friends. He also talked a bit too much about the ex and started going into reasons for the split etc but I managed to stop that!
So I'm not sure, he's asked to see me again I've said I'd like to but just not sure..... anyone been in this situation. Im a bit by it all as we got on sooooo well on the phone.

Juliette, it's pretty easy because the men on there are usually transparent, most of the 'undesirables' can be spotted from their profiles, and then a bit of causal messaging back and forth gives most of them enough rope to hang themselves.

Skype, is the next hurdle, then if I meet them I'll be non commital about whether I want to take things further, just to see how they respond..do they continue to be polite etc.

Needless to say I don't get to the coffee stage very often with anyone, let alone the bedroom stage :o

Sounds very much like my smash and grab which resulted in meeting TT.

Though neither of us were IE I was screening profiles and ditching the obviously mad/bad/sad/all three ones, talking a little to the ones I wasn't sure of which resulted in many ditchings and I think three got my email and only TT my number.

Didn't do skype at any point though I just met him.... I was happy enough with the pics he had and the conversation we had that he was the best of the bunch and worth meeting. I was right.

Still don't know if it will go beyond another date or two though but I did impress myself with my picking him out there. Haha.

I think you just have to be ruthless and dont give anyone the benefit of the doubt, I know lots of people dont like to skype, I think we just find our own ways of doing things.

I'm not seriously looking for anyone atm, it's more a little bit of chat or banter if I'm bored

Hello everyone (waves to thread)...

I'm back here after being away for ages - just activated POF and OKC again and waiting with baited breath ... I wonder what'll come out of the woodwork...

Sounds like some of you have been keeping warm indoors OWW and Kirsty... am v envious

So did you say you wanted sex, or is it the done thing to say relationship. Ate there signals which lay it out? I'm vaguely thinking about casual or fwb, there must be some good men who would suit, but wouldn't be bf material.

I was as open as I could be on my PoF profile. I said I wanted a casual relationship maybe just a step up or so from FWB

And explained that as nothing serious and no moving in or looking to the future or anything but all the good things (going out, sex etc) with just the one person.

I just say something like 'looking for a nice man for a regular arrangement' I cant be arsed writing much, but I suppose what you write will depend in part on what the 'norms' are on the site you are using

Text from nameless. I might have linked him to the eels song du jour. he has declared it sweet and is smiling at me.

I need some hand holding insouciance, because I've drunk the best part of a bottle of wine and might do terrible things.

Do you put your pics up right away or hide your profiles and swoop?

I put pictures up

wish I could hide half my face behind a big beard like that!

There would be something truly awkward about wanting just fwb and then finding out they weren't interested after the pic. I also wouldn't want to mix it up with the sites I've been on and rejected various men as relationship material. It's needs to be a mutually agreed casual thing from the off I guess.

Juliette, have I misunderstood, or are you saying that, because it's fwb you think the bloke wouldnt need to see a pic so as to check that you are his 'type'?