Residual Parenting Commitments, The Last Turkey In The Shop, Boiled Bunnies, Men With Fish and Stolen Condoms. Dating Thread XXXI.

[FlorentinePogen]

Get on with it, daters.............

While we're collectively holding our breath & crossing fingers for bant to shake off the sticky Artist, can I share a 'ponder' about OD code & patterns? I've noticed that guys who talk extensively (exclusively?) in emails about the quality of the relationship they seek/can offer as an opening gambit, do not follow through. I had one a while ago who simply gushed ending with 'seeing God's smile in the sunshine' (yer what, mate?!) - I ended that conversation sharpish. Most recent guy sounded quite genuine but did go on a bit about honesty , loyalty etc - imagine my surprise when I got an affectionate text from him that was clearly intended for someone else, and he's gone very quiet since I picked him up on it...That is all. As you were.

Ha Bant, no I didn't mean Budapest! So are you def going then and will you keep us posted on the Hungarian women??

Walk - Just, ugh.

I have just been liked on GS by a very scary looking specimen. I am going to stay in bed on the sofa with my BF Michael Buble.

Bant for what it's worth, I'd carry on ignoring her. She's already gone a day (?) without hearing from you, and that's one day closer to her giving up and going away. If you reply, you set the counter back to zero. And you also give her something to hope for, a motivation to keep texting - if you reply after a day or so's silence, then you could well reply after four/seven/twelve/x days' silence.

Like Before said, there are some people for whom even negative attention is better than no attention, and I think she's one of them.

Scary how this could have developed if she'd been to your house, a safety issue for us all to think about, really.

Artist. Please just leave it now. I'm sorry to have hurt you, but I don't want any more contact. I wish you well.

Bant, the artist lady is a bit scary sounding, I agree with those who've said dont engage with her, certainly don't go apologizing and explaining, if anything be business like.

Thing is, how hard is it to find someone's address?
She can probably find you on the electoral role or some kind of internet search?

Can i just interject to point out that we are at msg 957 - can we please have "bacon sarnies in suspenders" in the next thread title??

Western I never, ever say even the district where I live or my surname. Some have an issue with that and take it personally and that says all I need to know about them. My and DS security will always come first. If I start seeing them, then when I feel comfortable that's fine of course. My DS is a teen but the last thing I want is for him to have the worry on my behalf after some man who has taken rejection badly has turned up at my home.

Juliette I was the same, didn't have people pick me up or drop me off, only told them the town I live in, no surname etc. But the problem is after however many dates when you want the sausage to see the roll, most of the time you're going to end up at your house or theirs. Luckily Bant went to the artist's place, but it could have easily been the other way round, and potentially a much more difficult situation to deal with.

Oh she knows roughly whereabouts I live, the main road I live near, she could track me down if she really tries. I could probably take her in a fight if it got to it. I just really don't want it to get to it. I want her to just see the fact that I haven't responded to her last 14 texts as some kind of hint. Her last one, about 10 minutes ago, was simply 'Y'. I'm not sure if she's drunk and misspelled 'X' which she has done, or drunk and wants some kind of explanation over and above the several I've already given.

Yoga - probably yes to Hungary when I get the contract. I can keep my place over here (assuming the Artist hasn't burned it down) and travel is manageable, the job is my perfect ideal job I've wanted for years, and maybe a change in life is a good thing. I've never lived abroad, just stayed in a lot of hotels.

Can we not mention the same person twice in the next thread name? 'Bunnies' and 'condoms' were both about the artist, and maybe drove her over the edge (And yes Mercury no one really takes it seriously) - I'd suggest 'bacon sarnies in suspenders, suspicious opening gambits and... '
anything else?

perhaps we should just call it 'everything is fine and everyone is happy'?
just to be on the safe side:)

You may be able to take her in a fight, but she might be armed, or have help?

"...and no mentioning the C word!" ???

Living abroad could be quite exciting! And even better if it's such a fab job.

Lots of new beginnings in the new year.

No, don't call it "Everything is fine and everyone is happy" unless we want to put the kibosh on all that is fine and happy ...

Perhaps we should put loads of stuff that we don't like - crap/no jobs, being skint, people who don't pay their rent - into the title and thereby banish all that nonsense from our lives ...

doh! silly me:o
we'll end up with 'the thread that dare not speak it's name' at this rate :o

Excellent suggestion Mercury .

perhaps we should try and outline precisely how the curse of the thread name operates before we try and come up with the most auspicious title?

my impression is that anyone who is referred to (if obliquely) in the title is jinxed?
So if we mentioned being skint, then anyone who's skint will be jinxed??
yes I'm

and Yoga - speaking of new beginnings. Are you seriously reconsidering your life choices so much that you want to be kept up to speed on Hungarian women?

I actually did take a quick look on Match. Slim pickings, only 50 or so women in Budapest in vaguely my age range who've been online in the last month.

Having said that, the least attractive of them is probably on a par with the average profile in my area.

I think you're right Mercury. I'll get my coat.

Coffee has to be at their place for me. DS is always here and, just no . Although I did sneak last bf in, we had agreed we would go away for the weekend for pur forst time but it was snowing and I jumped him thought it best he stay. As it happened, DS was out at a party that night. In the morning we sneaked out to the local cafe first thing.

bant bloody hells bells. I think I'd not respond, see how it goes today & if the constant texting hasn't tailed off by this afternoon, send something along the lines of what lulu said, or whatever I said upthread (not the one about her being a crap-shag...) the script basically goes (1) 'I'm sorry you're upset' (not I've upset you) which acknowledges her feelings (2) 'however, I still feel (insert original reason for dumping)(restates your feelings) (3) 'I don't think we should stay in contact & I would appreciate it if you could stay the fuck away from me respect my decision'. (useful if you ever need to go to the rozzers.) (4) I do wish you well & will not be responding to any further contact.'

I'm going back to sleep now. :)

...but before I do, I wouldn't block anything, that just gives her a reason to ramp it up & you need the texts as evidence (sorry.)

Well I got a call from a blocked number last night and it was TheSurgeon!!!

A quick recap ..I spoke to him twice for 5 mins at the beginning of November and ended up telling him within a week that it was not a goer as he is a bunny boiler needing too much attention .. And I hadn't even met him yet!!

He texted me a fortnight ago and I ignored it and now he has called me .. I just told him 'wrong number' and hung up .. Crazy loony!

I was supposed to be having a nice long lie this morning as no kids but silly dog wanted out.

Bant not reconsidering my life choices that much I just meant don't leave the thread!

50 potential matches & u think that's slim pickings, bloody hell you shld try Glasgow! Have come to the conclusion that the 'Evolved West of Scotland Male' is a rare species indeed.

yoga if i were still in Glasgow, we could hunt in a pack!

Snape what is the weapon of choice when hunting such an elusive specimen?

Scotch pie with beans and a pint of heavy.

Dunno. Cleavage always seems to work.