He's just been to a nude lap dancing bar :(

[RunnyBum]

H just back from nude lap dancing bar, he has been on stag dos before and he knows I hate it. I'm gutted, he says I should forget this one "mistake" as he (allegedly) didn't has a private dance as he knows I would hate that. He claims he was just curious (inspite having been before and knowing all about it!!) Being in front of a naked woman that isnt me, for kicks just feels like cheating on some level. Oh and he wasn't on a stag tonight just out with a friend.

Found out as I Where's My Iphone'd him as he was meant to just be in our town, and I thought he'd be heading home.

We're meant to be going away on a romantic break in a few weeks, but a the minute I don't want him near me :(

How would u deal with this?

Posie,

I am not sure why you are boasting of your materialistic greed and the fact that you were extremely rude to someone who proferred you an apology for their behaviour.

Well done for the stealth boast re the "members bar in Soho" and the "vintage Krug", though.

Larry you cannot justify going to a lap dance club. However much you try.

You have to realise, visiting these places does mark you out as a sleaze. You may imagine its all ok and that most right thinking people accept it, but you need to realise most right thinking people don't accept it.

You need to get away form thinking about yourself and how it's just a drink and a night out. No, it's a drink and a night out in a room with women you don't know, walking around almost naked, trying to encourage you to sit down so they can put their breasts and arses in your face. And you do not know whether those women are there of their own accord or if they have been trafficked and abused/exploited.

That is not a normal night out.

Larry, are you going to explain your attempted dig at my "second marriage"?

How predictable, the same utter bollocks from the same couple of posters over and over again, they think they're soo clever, being all reasonable but underneath the wafer-thin veneer they're just common or garden misogynists parading as decent human beings.

I'm glad Larry has no daughters and can only hope his sons are nothing like him.

Malificence,

"I'm glad Larry has no daughters and can only hope his sons are nothing like him. "

Totally pathetic and nasty ad hominem attack on innocent toddlers (ever so thinly disguised as an attack on me). This kind of post is beyond the pail IMO and marks the poster out as not a very nice person.

I guess to get malificence by a poster who styles herself by that name is hardly surprising. The eponymous Malificence...has a nice ring to it.

Happy,

To anyone else, I would apologise but it was a genuine mistake based on conclusions from what you have posted in the past. To you, though, who have termed me a "wife abuser" amongst other choice phrases in posts which have been deleted from contravening the rules, I offer no apology. You give it out, you can take it.

If you want it removed, report it.

I have been trying to remember if I have been bought a drink by a man, other when we have been out in a crowd and someone has bought a round. I don't think so (and since meeting my DH at age 19yo, I would not have accepted since, because it would have insinuated by my acceptance that I was interested in furthering the acquaintance.

So in that you are correct, Larry, that a man who buys a woman a drink does so because he expects a chat, and perhaps more to develop.

How that equates with topless bars, i really don't know. Can you not see how ridiculous the comparison is?

It is like me standing in M&S and a woman asking 'Does my bum look big in this?'. As a customer, I could be as direct as I wanted to be, 'Well, now you ask me, I think you are blocking the sun'.

If I was an employee of M&S, I would gently steer the woman to a more flattering outfit.

The analogy only works if M&S routinely abuse and exploit their staff though.

No, I'm not a nice person, not to pathetic creepy men anyway.
You do realise that you make our collective skins crawl, Larry? Is that what you get off on?

Yes, Mal, I think it is.

I'm at a loss Larry as to why it was boasting? The guy said vulgar and hideous things to me and I made him pay, isn't that the sort of woman you like. Except your exchange would have been the other way around.

The guy talked about sitting on his face and rubbing his cock with my tits.... how much is the going rate nowadays for that.

Now had he walked into a lap dancing club and paid £140 in Spearmint Rhino, what would he have got?

Can I remind everyone not to post direct insults against individual posters on this thread.

I don't want anyone banned because they are being honest and truthful.

Lindor

These men have to pay to see a woman's labia.
They are to be pitied IMHO.
I wonder if these men could hear the internal monologue in these girls minds as they dance for them, what they would think then?
Do they actually imagine the women feel anything other than revulsion, disgust and contempt for them?
Deeply sad.

I agree with you Badvoc and IMO that is what makes a man who visits these places the men to avoid.

Who would want to be in a relationship with a man who is so deluded and so incredibly thick?

Yep.
Can you imagine?
A fat sweaty dead eyed drunk probably balding man leering over a young woman and thinking - actually really believing - she enjoys it or that he would have any chance at all if he weren't paying her!!
Bluergh.....

As for the assumption that visiting these sex establishments is a normal/common activity, I asked DH how many men he knows that have gone to strip clubs, in 30 years ( 12 of them being in the RAF) and hundreds of men, in 7 different jobs, he can think of perhaps half a dozen, so really not common at all, they were all universally condemned as being "sad gits" too
( by other men ).

I'll have to ask 22 year old DD how many men she knows have visited them.

I wasn't looking for an apology, Larry, nor your post deleted.

I was just wondering why you have inferred a few sentences on here that I, personally, am "on my second marriage"

Inferred by

Inferred from gah

larry I'm perfectly happy if a man buys me a drink because he finds me pretty or fun. Its not so he can have a closer inspection of my fanny.

Well, it might be, but it wouldn't be on display in the first place.

Actually when men have bought me a drink in the past its usually after they have chatted for a while- 'oh would you like a drink'. And I. Have walked away without giving them anything. I can't be bought for a drink.

The grossest thing about lap dancing bars is that men are paying women to pretend to be sexually into something they're not really into.

And I think the only men who are able to suspend their disbelief to that extent are the ones who don't give a shit about what that woman is actually feeling about the situation.

I'd find it so cringey to pay money to someone and then watch them act like they were 'really into getting naked for me' or whatever. When I know, and she/knows that I know that they're really not.

There's no difference between buying a drink for a woman in a bar... For larry...

That's because I suspect larry thinks men buy women.

Larry also seems to think women show breasts or dress up in order to tempt men to buy them...

And again with the jibes about marriage larry... Anyone would think you judged a woman entirely on her ability to get and keep a man... but then I know that can't be true...

Should have read: she/he knows.

Okay.

1. No one owes anyone fuck all in return for a poxy drink. Least of all sex. Jesus Christ, if that's what passes for seduction in some men's minds then I really do despair.

1. Just to clear this up once and for all; women with healthy self esteem dress for themselves. I wear nice clothes and do my hair and make up nicely because the most important thing is that I fancy myself. Fuck what anyone else thinks.