Huffy, illiterate men, scared of peas, it's a weird, weird dating world (No22)

[ChaoticismyLife]

Oh, watch...you mentioned flowers

Tell us more...

Hi jam!

Sponge - agree!

Chaotic - thanks, I know. Telling myself am doing it with no expectations and just fun. (& Hopefully will not end in tears this time)

Today's offerings hamlet 'I have of late and wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth, forgone all custom of exercises, indeed it sits so heavily upon my disposition' etc etc he's always wanted to play hamlet...

And
hello sweetie!. Cheated with this one, I could NOT paint Alex Kingston. The text is 'you'll see me again, you've got all of that to come, time and space. You watch us run', ' did you dance? Well, you always dance at weddings, don't you..'. 'hello sweetie', 'you, me, handcuffs. Must it always end this way?' ' I live for the days when I see him, but I know that every time I do, he'll be one step further away', 'you're going to find out very soon, and then, I'm sorry, everything changes' 'spoilers..'. 'no. You tell me. Tell me who you are'. 'I am telling you. Can't you read?'

Fantastic artwork as usual snape :)

I look forward to your links.

I'm going to be in the almost unheard of position of being alone this week. Dd is at uni, ds is going on a residential so it's me and Panda the dog and cake this week :)

If you have cake and pets, all will be well. Enjoy your quiet time!

Thank you chaotic. Enjoy your cake me time. :-)

I should really give the notebook it's own thread, but his birthday is a month away and MN can be impatient. Maybe a week before, I'll thread it up some and get everyone else involved in my rejection love story...

WW I intend to

In the 12yrs+ my dc have spent 2 nights at their dads. They have each had a short break with their respective schools, at different times but those two nights have been the only nights I've had on my own. It'll feel a bit weird but I intend to enjoy myself.

snape you snuck in while I was typing

Your notebook deserves its own thread but I see your point about the impatience of mn and the timeframe.

I am stealth! :-)

snape you have inspired me to do some drawing. I have half a notion to get a tattoo one of these days (although would be particularly controversial with my family for various reasons) so don't know if I'll ever actually do it. But enjoying the creative process, it's kind of all consuming.

I love your notebook, it is amazing. you are my hero

Very enjoyable texting tonight with the optician - hope he's as nice in the flesh tomorrow! I have a horrible cough although I feel ok, but it sounds a bit alarming. Fingers crossed it will subside a bit by tomorrow - I sound like a tubercular sixty-a-day woman, bit off putting.

Thank you for the welcome, Yoga and Nicholas

DoingIt and Chaotic Thank you...but I strongly suspect that the men I have attracted in the street are the very men who give POF a bad name! My colleagues find it hilarious, but we have all concluded it's because I forget to turn off my 'approachable helpful customer friendly' face on leaving work, and I need to practice looking busy and unapproachable.

Work colleague has emailed me this afternoon with a tenuously work connected query, followed by a link to something un-work related we talked about last week (a sport we both enjoy) and then asking how my weekend is going.. but I am going to think about him as a potential new friend, that is lovely advice and makes me feel much more relaxed, thank you!

snape your notebook is beautiful, wow.

Hi Jam - just wanted to say a proper welcome this time. I think many of us on here have similar stories - so it's not just about dating or internet dating but about how to get used to being single again after a long time. We all seem to find our way here in our own time.

I was with my XH for 18 years, married for 14. Separated at new year after I found out he was having an affair and went through a pretty hellish time with it. But like you, finally gotten through all the official stuff, putting my life back together and discovering the ups (and downs!) of single life. And i have to say, finding many more pros than cons!

The dating thing is funny. never really dated in my 20s and certainly didn't do "internet dating" so it's all a bit of a learning curve. The best thing for me was having a bit of a fling/FWB thing early on with a slightly older man. I fancied him but neither of us was in it for anything serious so it took all the pressure off and was a great way to just remember what it felt like to be with someone new after so long. It was a good confidence boost and no chance of a broken heart so soon after all the trauma of my marriage ending.

Good luck and just try and enjoy. x

western good luck for tomorrow! and hope the cough improves overnight.

agree the notebook deserves its own thread :)

I still feel terrible. I'm not sure I can ever drink again. Also slightly embarassed re snogging. Thankfully he is off work for the next week so at least I won't have to worry about bumping into him by the coffee machine on monday morning.

one good thing - he thought I was 30

Shame today I look about 80!

Ah, sponge, you could never look 80.

Yay for snogging younger men! Sponge, if no one else knows, who cares?!

Hello Jam, and welcome. Online dating is very different to the ways I found a boyfriend when I was younger and single, but it can be fun, in it's own way!

Snape - it's all gone a bit "Time Traveller's Wife" innit?
Your story is exactly what the press would love. There's a movie in there, absolutely did I mention I'm a writer? So be wary of putting it "out there" - you could get more attention than you bargained for.
Just sayin'

Well I have been offered a FWB arrangement by someone ten years younger He's very persistent (and hot) but it's not for me. He's quite honest too, saying he has a "harem" and that it wouldn't lead to a relationship. I think he imagines he can persuade me.

Oh and I joined OKC - and am so far amazed at the standard, much better than Match Affinity! Mind you that could be something to do with my stroppy profile...

Welcome Newjam

He's quite honest too, saying he has a "harem" and that it wouldn't lead to a relationship
I'd bet a pound to a penny he's bullshitting, it's way easier for women to get no strings sex, I could put together a harem in a week or so if I had a mind to.
(Not that I'd be dumb enough to tell the men involved)

men struggle to even get a response from women when it comes to casual arrangements and he's pretty naive if he thinks that making out he's seeing lots of women will improve his chances of scoring

Mercury, can you tell me how to put together a harem - I can't even get the bastards to text me! (except the ones I don't fancy of course)

I'm struggling with the whole concept of 'dating' purely because I went from my first school boyfriend to one-night-stands (+ a relationship that lead from a ONS) at Uni into lots of ONS in my early 20s and then STBXH who was a holiday fling/ONS that never stopped, so I haven't really ever been on actual 'dates' before, just lots of shagging!

Its the sheer effort of having to 'impress' that's putting me off, in fact the last POF date I had we both moaned about how it was all a bit like hard work and that it would be nice to just 'be in a relationship' without having to do the dance first. Didn't realise that meant he couldn't be arsed to even pick up the phone!

Yoga, I'm thinking of a tattoo too! New beginnings sort of thing, but the phoenix seems a bit cliche. What would you get?

mercury he's a charmer for sure.
I have just had my first cock pic
No way am I going near that. [wince]

sure doing itjoin one of the girls date for free sites, there are around 10 or more men for every woman, most of the women are pretty wacky eg:

Hi i'm XXX, i am looking for a group of 4-6 well hung men to fill me in every hole infront of my husband for his birthday present, i have dp once before and loved it. He loves to see me in leather boots, tight jeans and top. He wants to see them ripped open and me fucked hard and stretched wide'

or just a bit rough (i've been browsing womens profiles) so anyone 'nice' will stand out a mile.

All you need is good photo's and you'll be flooded with offers, obviously some will be pond life but there are some nice men
(I had 4 on the go last summer for a while)

You're quite right madameO. I'm not the sort to relish myself being splashed all over the daily mail and as I certainly wouldn't play ball with journos, I'll just quietly stick up the occasional page here. :-)

at the harem. I think he's BSing as well.

sponge. For shame! Snogging a BOY!!!

I'm really tired today, might go for a swim, but car is running on fumes and it's the last week before payday. Spose i could cycle. Had horrible row with DS1 yesterday, all patched up now but still takes it out of you, doesn't it... Chatting with prof yesterday, nice. No word from PM, had nasty dream that we'd had a row at the lesbian ball, so woke up unhappy.

Doingit - idea of pheonix came to mind too. I'm nowhere near as talented as snape but I draw a little so if I ever got one I'd probably try to design it myself.

I did a series of 3 sketches last night. All are silhouettes of a female figure from the back, arms stretched overhead holding a heart in her hands. 1st one is "Balance" - she's standing in a yoga "Tree" pose. 2nd one "Rebirth" (Phoenix) - sillouette is rising from flames. 3rd one "Freedom/Flight" - she has butterfly wings on her back.

I actually like the 3 together, I feel like it's telling some kind of story so I might just keep working on the sketches to put up on my wall even if I don't go for the tattoo. (Although if it's telling a story I should swap 1 & 2 around)

That sounds lovely Yoga - makes me feel calm just picturing it
Off out as my boiler is fooked so no heating. Fortunately I am cashmere queen (even if it is 2nd hand from eBay)