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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Would I be a crazy stalker or does this sound normal?

182 replies

skyofdiamonds · 21/08/2012 18:44

I was in the bank last week sorting out some things which meant I had to come in on two consecutive days to see the same lad who works there.

He is my age. (early twenties)

Anyway, we seemed to hit it off quite well. I ended up finding out lots about him but I can't work out if he was just doing his job and being nice to his customers or actually having a really good conversation with me.

I found out where he lives
what he drives
what he used to drive
what uni he went to/what he did there
his holidays
his football team
what he did the evening before
where he goes out and how often
how he gets to work
whether he enjoys his job
the crap parts of his job
whether he socialises with any colleagues
what hes doing at the weekend
what hes planning to do in the future
that hes learning a new language
where he eats lunch
about his awful customers
his old job
where he grew up
his previous relationship ended
where he went to school/college
etc etc

He was comfortable enough to whip his phone out quickly to check an update on BBC sport that we were talking about!

At the end he joked that he would message me if I was right about my football prediction but obviously that would go against Data Protection Act etc so wouldn't expect him to! (I'd never do that to any of my patients as I'd lose my job and I'm sure would be the same in his situation)

Surely he wouldn't divulge so much about his customers/ job issues with everyone!

So, would it be really weird to message him on FB about our cheeky joke with the football? Bearing in mind, he gave me his work card with his name on so he was easy to find... or am I a stalker?

He was so lovely, normal and someone I'd love to spend more time with!

OP posts:
CrystalsAreCool · 22/08/2012 00:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Beckamaw · 22/08/2012 01:51

Crystals, we is loving the romance of it all! Grin
Swooooon (and marking place for exciting update).

NotMostPeople · 22/08/2012 02:09

Marking place, it sounds so exciting.

garlicnuts · 22/08/2012 02:16

fingers crossed!

mirai · 22/08/2012 02:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThePieSmuggler · 22/08/2012 09:14

Op, have you checked Facebook today yet? I'm dying for an update Grin

Wowserz129 · 22/08/2012 09:17

No that is stalkerish too add him on Facebook! Do you not have some other pleasure to do at the bank anytime soon?

Wowserz129 · 22/08/2012 09:18

Oh darn I didn't read the last couple pages! In that case good luck

Grin
PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot · 22/08/2012 09:22

Ooo how exciting.

Wowserz129 · 22/08/2012 09:29

Just caught up. Well done for Gavin the guts to do it Grin. You are braver than me that's for sure!!

I am another one who thinks he might not notice it for a few days if its in others folder so dont panic if no immediate reply xx

BedGirl · 22/08/2012 09:30

Good luck!

I never knew there was an 'others' message folder. I hope he does!

Wowserz129 · 22/08/2012 09:30

Gavin? Who's Gavin. I meant having, bloody phone!

I am going too stop spamming your thread now Blush

Olympicnmix · 22/08/2012 09:33

Me neither - where is the 'others' message folder or what does it look like?

But hope you hear from him in the next day or two. Nothing ventured and all that.

EightiesChick · 22/08/2012 09:33

Marking place to see what happens!

dipstick101 · 22/08/2012 09:38

same as eightyschick .... how juicy!!! you are brave!!! I'd never do that!!!

BedGirl · 22/08/2012 09:44

You came see your others folder if you click onto the messages page, it is only the left hand side.

Desiren · 22/08/2012 11:05

Marking place to come back for update. Oooh exciting.

CuriousMama · 22/08/2012 11:09

Yes that's true it could've gone in the other folder and he may never see it. I'd add him as a friend.

Rindercella · 22/08/2012 11:20
Grin
TheCraicDealer · 22/08/2012 11:22

Some lovely stories on this thread!

I don't know Crystals, if you're in for a review or doing something with a personal advisor you can be in with them for a good 30mins or more, it's natural to get talking especially if you fancy the pants off them

In one of the branches I worked in there was a bloke who used to queue for me specifically. When asked by the one of the other cashiers he used to go, "No, I'm waiting for Craic", and then talk to me for extended periods of time about very dull things. Thankfully he didn't ask me out before I left- I didn't fancy him, so that would've been well awkward.

It's a good thing you didn't have his work email on his card, they're usually monitored so could've been cringetastic if you'd used it. There was another occasion in a different bank where this happened to one of my colleagues. Unfortunately the man phrased it as he thought said colleague was the most beautiful and interesting woman he'd ever met, couldn't stop thinking about her and wanted to know where we socialised after work so he could buy her a drink. She was really freaked out, and he was banned from the branch as it crossed the line into stalker-ville.

Keep us updated OP!!! I hope you're more successful than those two ^ Grin

OneMoreChap · 22/08/2012 11:27

I'm an older bloke; I would have said by all means send him a friend request. He could always decline it. Me, I don't friend anyone from work, but would happily friend anyone I have met [I do lock down the privacy setting they get].

You might find he sends you loads of Farmville/MafiaWars requests - in which case you have to block those...

CuriousMama · 22/08/2012 11:30

OneMoreChap How do you block requests from farmville etc?? (sorry for hijack op)

OhDearNigel · 22/08/2012 11:31

can't you just send him a friend request on FB ? That's fairly innocuous imo and if he thinks " waah weirdo stalker" he can just ignore it.

missymoomoomee · 22/08/2012 11:38

Curious you go to a post from them on your wall if you look a bit further to the right there is a little arrow, if you click that it gives a list of options, I think one says something like delete/block all posts by XXXX you will never see anyone begging for you to feed a crop or send a horseshoe again.

pinkyp · 22/08/2012 11:39

Hope he's replies Smile