His mother should've swallowed

[LouP19]

Is this title too rude?!!!

I appreciate everyone warning caution. Trust me, I'm using this place to rant and rave and swear and all that,... at the moment I haven't done anything. And even if I do manage to locate him (with some first class help!) I might not necessarily do anything with that information just yet. But I would just like to know, that's all, instead of driving round looking for his car all the time,.... Just this knowledge will make me feel a bit more empowered.

All advice on here is very helpful - the calm, the practical, the hysterical, the funny, the 'been there done that', it's all amazing and I value all of it.

YAY, Lou!

You're no pushover :)

me too.

Porto - I feel your comments are neither supportive or helpful and so a little out of context on this thread.

Lou, you are quite wonderful. Wish we could protect you from hurt on these boards. Should be a safe place away from the trauma of your real life.

Another hard day for you Lou. I so hope things start looking up for you soon and that you can move forward in a positive way. Try to ignore the unhelpful posters on here and concentrate on the huge majority of posters who are genuinely trying to be helpful.....x

Oh Lou I'm so sorry you've had such a stressful & upsetting day. And sorry that some of the "advice" on your thread isn't helping support you in the way you need it.

You might just want to step away from this thread for a bit.

I hope that a good night's sleep will bring a different perspective in the morning.

Most importantly, take care of yourself

What a shattering day for you Lou.

Unluckily the medical services we should have, and the ones we do have, are two different things (for many reasons, which I won't try to discuss here).

The BPAS home page does look helpful, with those thoughtful questions and charts.

Hope you sleep well tonight.

Gah just lost a huge post

Sorry it was a tough afternoon Lou. Take care of yourself and don't pressurise yourself to decide too soon. Do something nice and distracting if you can face it. The suggestion about having some time off from here may be a good one. There are still lots of us supporting you if you need us though.

Thank you bossybritches.

I don't mind people putting things on here that I might not agree with, of course not! But being questioned like that just makes me feel someone is prodding, and prodding, and prodding. And then prodding some more.

Hugs from me too.

I can't rate Marie Stopes either - the advice I got? 'Go on, live a little!' (or some such I was so shocked I can't remember it.

But like you Lou I was in a very difficult situation (4 children under 8 married to narcissist so no support, isolated and very depressed. Completely unaware of the narcissist, and the depression. All I knew is that I could not cope).

For me, G-d intervened. I went to the clinic and the scan revealed no heartbeat and I started miscarrying that night.

But sending you lots of compassion - NOTHING about this is easy. Whatever decision you make will involve difficulty and pain, so can I just convey my respect for whatever difficult decision you do make.

((((( Lou )))))

Great day for biking Ivana - not for me today though

Please let's think about what we're posting - lou has stated she is upset and offended by some of the posts

Lou I urge you to ignore those posts. Your integrity is not in question here.
I know that sucks clinic exists at Royal Derby Hospital, I also know it is often full of gobby teenagers bragging about their exploits and using abortion as a means of contraception

Please, no bunfights tonight eh?

I also reported the disgraceful personal attacks/troll hunting that has been posted by a certain someone.

Lou, so sorry to hear you've had such a traumatic day. I imagine it all felt pretty surreal given your long term ttc, and that you are being deafened by the cognitive dissonance inside?
Thinking of you at a really difficult time x

If you are talking of me, cake. i reported myself.

Lou what a tough tough day for you. You have been so strong on so many fronts and this is the most personal and hard thing to deal with. I do understand that you want to talk to Chunt- for years he has been your husband. That is a very hard history to break.
Just remember that he has a new and completely self-centred agenda and will probably not make you feel better when you are vulnerable.
I am thinking of you very much and am sure that you will find the strength to make the decision that is best for you.
I hope your threads can stay on track as a place of support for you. xx

Oh Lou, I'm so, so sorry to read about your awful afternoon. And yes, healthcare providers do sometimes get it very wrong.

Have a decaffeinated and a good night's rest.

Hope tomorrow is a better day. x

Thanks Babylon

Night night. Some great advice on here (BPAS for e.g) so I'm very grateful for all your help.

I'll still use the board over the next few days, but don't think I'll discuss the pregnancy after this,.... But it's still very useful to share and rant about some of the antics of the twunt!!

Porto Irrelevant. Nobody is on this post for info on the process involved. We're all here to support the OP. If you are not, kindly jog on.

Lou, I'm so sorry your day has been so grim ((big hug)).

Given the same consultants usually work in all the different parts of obs & gynae, maybe when they received the GP referral they thought that the termination clinic was more appropriate than the fertility clinic. At the fertility clinc it would be more happy couples & 'Hurray you're pregnant', where as at the other clinic you would be able to get better information on what a termination involves, what the time limits are, how to book in etc They would also (presumably) be a bit more sensitive about the scan in terms of referring to the pregnancy, turning the screen away etc? Or your GP is an idiot. Either way I'm shocked that there was no counselling available, hopefully you'll be able to get an appointment soon.

Take care.

FFS Portofino. Let it lie will you, for the love of Pete. You're not the important one here.

I have been following these threads since the beginning and it has been fantastic support for the OP. You're insinuating, and being a knob.

porto, do you have a point to make?

if so, what is it? just so we're all clear

Lou, i am sorry you had such a rough day. i hope somehow tomorrow is a better one.

I have reported profo as i feel her posts are either bullying or stalking, i cant decide which.