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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

His mother should've swallowed

999 replies

LouP19 · 19/08/2012 21:11

Is this title too rude?!!!

I appreciate everyone warning caution. Trust me, I'm using this place to rant and rave and swear and all that,... at the moment I haven't done anything. And even if I do manage to locate him (with some first class help!) I might not necessarily do anything with that information just yet. But I would just like to know, that's all, instead of driving round looking for his car all the time,.... Just this knowledge will make me feel a bit more empowered.

All advice on here is very helpful - the calm, the practical, the hysterical, the funny, the 'been there done that', it's all amazing and I value all of it. Smile

OP posts:
BabylonPI · 21/08/2012 21:26

I'm here lurking Lou, I've nothing useful to add other than what I texted to you earlier!

I don't want to keep posting and using up valuable space for support, but be assured I'm here and if you need anything you just need to yell Smile

IvanaNap · 21/08/2012 21:26

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn as this poster has privacy concerns.

Ponders · 21/08/2012 21:26

oh, Lou Sad

I can't imagine how sickening it would be to find yourself in that sort of clinic when you were expecting something completely different

& I can understand completely why you feel you want to talk to the chutney smuggler (however useless that would probably be)

you poor love

Original poster
LouP19 · 21/08/2012 21:26

I don't know Porto, ok? I am under the fertility clinic, my female gp made me an appointment at the Obs and Gynae Unit, it seems Tuesday afternoon was all about abortions. The GP who made this appointment is currently on 2 weeks leave so no point chasing her right now to have a go. Really, I can't be doing with nit picking and interogating over these details.

OP posts:
FrankWippery · 21/08/2012 21:27

I think you have been treated appallingly Lou, I am so sorry to read your posts this evening. I think you have a very very legitimate complaint against your GP here. Surely they can't have been thinking in their sending you to an abortion clinic.

I hope that you can speak to a counsellor soonest, it sounds like you have an awful lot to digest, and only you can make the final decision one way or the other.

Please to hear you have a new solicitor lined up, hopefully you can get some sensible wheels in motion early next week too. Good luck with it.

BabylonPI · 21/08/2012 21:27

In derby yes, there is an abortion clinic based at the Royal Derby Hospital.

grumpykat · 21/08/2012 21:29

Oh god. I've done the fertility clinic and the abortion clinic (at different times, long story). I do think that your doctor has dropped a bollock there, why on earth were you sent to an abortion clinic?
You need to tell them exactly how inappropriate that was when you next go in. Poor you, how heartbreaking.
You have plenty of time, although it doesn't feel like it. I imagine a lot will crystallise over the next three weeks so try not to beat yourself up looking for a decision, it may well just come to you without warning and then you'll 'just know'.
Lots of love x

Houseofplain · 21/08/2012 21:29

The fact that you are now distressing the op, as well as other posters. Enough dontcha think?

Portofino · 21/08/2012 21:29

This reply has been deleted

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DorisIsWaiting · 21/08/2012 21:29

Oh Lou that's awful.

You haven't made a decision yet, this was supposed to help you not make you feel worse. I know it might be a bit much for you at the moment but when you are more settled again a chat with the GP practice manager may help. It was either misinformation or wrongly booked. Either way I can't imagine how you felt but my heart goes out to you.

Please look after yourself.

Whilst I know that at somepoint you will need to talk to chunt, give yourself time and space so YOU are confident in where you want to be and he can not impose his worries and choices upon you, adding to not easing your troubles.

Love today sounds like it has been a shitter take care and hope for better tomorrow x

grumpykat · 21/08/2012 21:29

sorry, cross post.

grumpykat · 21/08/2012 21:30

Porto, I've been to one. They're shit. They do exist. What exactly are you insinuating?

garlicnuts · 21/08/2012 21:31

Intentionally or not, there is now quite a bit of agenda-pushing on this thread.
Lou's a real person with a very complicated real life to navigate at the moment.
She is neither a child nor a half-wit. She does not need to be told what to do.
I'm sure information and friendship are most welcome. I don't see that she needs or wants advice. For those who feel they've got points to make, perhaps it would be more considerate to start another thread discussing your points.

Apols for speaking on your behalf, Lou Blush

Portofino · 21/08/2012 21:31

Of course they exist.

MariaCallous · 21/08/2012 21:32

Lou, so sorry today was even harder than it had to be. Nothing more to say lovely. So so sorry.

Portofino · 21/08/2012 21:33

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

cfc · 21/08/2012 21:33

The ineptitude of some service providers never fails to astound me. Lou, I am sorry this didn't go 'as planned' today.

I'm sorry you've found yourself here, making these choices, through no fault of your own. Life is SO incredibly unfair.

But it is the life you are living at the moment. You are doing so very well in our eyes. You are only human as your need to share this with the man you've been planning this with (as it were) proves.

Have a sleep and speak to someone tomorrow as noted above, you need professional assistance here - even though you know they cannot tell you what to do. Give yourself the night off this shit. Without guilt.

MariaCallous · 21/08/2012 21:34

Porto. If you feel post is inappropriate report. Don't insinuate. Don't nitpick. Report.

Portofino · 21/08/2012 21:34

I did report.

lissielou · 21/08/2012 21:35

But she's been getting advice from the beginning, hasn't she?

Maybe I should go back to lurking Sad.

lissielou · 21/08/2012 21:35

But she's been getting advice from the beginning, hasn't she?

Maybe I should go back to lurking Sad.

IvanaNap · 21/08/2012 21:38

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn as this poster has privacy concerns.

Original poster
LouP19 · 21/08/2012 21:38

Do people honestly believe that someone under consultant led fertility treatment was sent to an "abortion clinic" by mistake and that she would go there and sit in the waiting room for a scan without querying it? Cos I don't.

Porto, I pity you.

Yes, this happened to me. I sat in the Obs and Gyn waiting room. At no point did it say 'Hello welcome to the abortion afternoon'. But it became clear as the girls were being called in that that was what the afternoon was about.

Just leave me alone. You are upsetting and offending me. I do not see any point in you on this board. Thank you.

OP posts:
brianbennettfan · 21/08/2012 21:38

Lou, I am so very sorry that you have had a less than productive day. It is awful when you feel that you need the support of someone who has let you down so badly. I have been there, it is so confusing. Hope you can get some rest tonight and that you make some progress tomorrow on the counselling front with the help of your DM. x Thanks

Pickles77 · 21/08/2012 21:39

lou I just want to hug you xxx

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