real life challenges vs online misadventures, dating (and non-dating) thread 19

[hatesponge]

I have been to the pub. I'm not pissed but I am happy (well happier at least).

Conclusions reached this evening:

1. I am pretty bloody amazing, and any man I choose to date is very very lucky and should appreciate this fact!
2. Online dating is not for me. But I have learned from it that I shouldnt judge a book by it's cover and not to be so superficial
3. Man from the weekend DID like me, he is either still in love with his wife, or still hurt by her and lacking in confidence, there is NOTHING I did wrong, and he probably will be back at some point, but it will be too late because I will have MOVED ON :)
4. I am joining the gym and losing my remaining 3 stone.
5. I am going back to my old haunts in Essex this weekend because I have the best nights out there and feel at home. I intend to drink, dance, look fabulous and talk to anyone and everyone!

So that's my resolutions for the thread in essence, less moaning, more exercise, to have fun and be sociable to everyone, less aloof unavailable ice queen and more friendly and approachable.

I don't by magazines either, I would rather save my money and buy books. I totally agree with you about all the crap they contain. Plus, they seem to appeal to a younger woman, you know, one more likely to be swayed by all that crap. I'm too wise for all that now.

Happy birthday to sponge's DS1 and happy birthday for tomorrow to time's DD

snape I would take advantage of it even if it only ended in.sex cos I am needy

Happy birthday to sponge's DS1 and happy birthday for tomorrow to time's DD

snape I would take advantage of it even if it only ended in.sex cos I am needy

Sorry, I know i've not been keeping up but can I ask a question? Last week I said no to the somewhat drunken/horny pleadings from the guy I thought had just broken up with me! If I now decide I want to use him for sex...is that ok?

..or is he still just getting what he wants (ie sex from me with no relationship)?

Yogagirl you ask if it's ok if you use him for sex, and I would say yes, that's fine if it's what you want to do, but you can't really ask more of him and complain that he only wants sex, because that would be double standards

Yoga Surely it is.ok if you want the same thing???

yoga of course you can use him for sex, lets turn these tables!!!

Hee, hee thank you ladies - that's what I wanted to hear!

The ironic thing is - he was the one who started all the heavy duty relationship talk - said he's been divorced a long time and was ready for someone to share his life and it couldn't work because we're both too tied to where we live etc, etc. and therefore couldn't see each other any more. So yes, I was mad that he then suddenly turned around wanted companysex

But I've only been separated since January and am much more in need of a bit of fun then something deadly serious at this stage. Ok, I did start to really, really like him...but if he hadn't said anything I'm pretty sure I would have been quite happy to carry on seeingshagging him without asking for more.

Oh I would go for it. If you like him, then why not? I would be up for a bit of fun with a nice man, if I could only find one

Have fun!

I intend to

yogagirl do enjoy, it is perfectly acceptable to take advantage enjoy the sex company. You only live once!! I am now a good time girl six years of marriage taught me this i am 24!!

Have been reading through bits of this thread; joined plenty of fish recently having broken up with my ex in Jan (met him through match.com so there is hope!) I just had to come somewhere and vent about my disastrous day today.

First of all I got a message from a guy this morning who asked if I wanted to meet up for half an hour for sex. I felt like a prostitute. Didn't even bother to ask if I wanted to have a drink. I was getting very strong vibes that he was married too. I said no but wish I'd told him to fuck offbeen a bit more vehement about it.

Went on a date tonight with a lovely guy, very interesting, spends his life travelling the world, good kisser. But it all deteriorated into 'I haven't had sex in ages, PLEASE just shag me' I mean, really? Those were his actual words, I'm not paraphrasing. When I said no, he got all, 'is it me, am I too nice?' and looked like he was going to cry. Aaargghhh.

why didn't my strikethrough work? hmm.

Welcome to the world of internet dating and you havent been introduced to POF til you get a cock pic, do expect more of such messages, that is plenty of freaks/fuckmuppets/fish for you. LOL

Sorry your date ended badly though. Chin up, start over, if you fall of a horse you brush yourself down and get back on top of that man horse.

omi gosh Phacelia, what are they LIKE, apart from anything else why would you even bother for half an hour of sex?

good grief

welcome Phacelia.

arrgghh can't sleep

Hello, I'm another long-time lurker.

I've been in an LDR with a guy I met off the internet for the last 2 years. for many reasons, it has suited me, juggling work with 3DC and XH works abroad so difficult to find time for anything more, the LDR has been like an exclusive FWB.

However, I've started to feel that I would like more. I don't think it is going to happen with him though, we are both primary carers to our DC and neither of us would want to uproot them and re-locate.

So having read some of Time's good advice to Snape I thought it was time to have a chat.

Last night, had a text from him. He was in hospital with one of his DTS. DTS is having tests, it could be serious .

So now I feel all over the place, can't talk about us now, whilst he's going through this, but despite a 2 year relationship I am not in a position to give him any support (we have never met each other's DCs). I can't begin to imagine how he's feeling.

Not a great opening post I know, but just needed to get it out

Thanks guys. I haven't received any cock photos. I will, err, look forward to my first one! I did come home last night thinking I would give up completely and just get a dog for company, but hopefully there are some more promising specimens out there.

Olympic I'm so sorry about your situation and your dp's dc. I hope the outcome is good. Very hard to support someone going through something awful from far away.

Morning everyone! Birthday girl is in the bath so just popped on to wish lubey well for The Chat today. Hope it goes as well as you would like it to.

Olympic Are you in a position to actually get more from your LDR? Is it feasible, considering the distance? As far as supporting him is concerned, I think he will be happy just to know you are thinking of him and are there for him if he needs to talk. You can't do as much for him as you would be able to do if he lived in the next town but you are doing as much as distance allows so please don't be too hard on yourself. And you know, if you are wanting to end things with him, it might be a good time to tell him you are taking a step back and giving him the space to concentrate on his DC. As harsh and heartless as this makes me sound, you can't stay in a situation with someone just because they are going through troubles. Sorry.

Phacelia If you happen to come across any promising specimens would you kindly let us know cos we haven't hit on any yet

Happy birthday to sponges son, and Times dd :) hope you all have lovely days.

Thinking of you lubey. Hope it goes ok and you are ok.

Dd met mrl last night. I am gobsmacked and so proud of her, it went better than I ever could have imagined. She was just lovely. I am a very Lucky woman.

Glad it went well Watch

Lubey hope you managed to get some sleep!

Olympic I'm sure if you let him know you are there then that is support

First off, happy birthday to all the birthday kids today!

Phacelia - what an awful first experience! I tried POF for about 2 days but have decided it's not for me right now. However, in my limited experience, I put lots of restrictions on who could contact me (not looking for 'intimate encounters' not contacted others for the same etc). Also, didn't bother to reply to anyone who's opening message didn't consist of at least a couple of complete sentences or included 'hey sexy lady', 'you look luvely xxx'! Even then, there's guarantees - I started chatting to a guy who seemed perfectly nice and respectable, talked a lot about his kids, his work etc. Then when I said, 'sorry but not ready to meet right now I've realised I still have a lot of other stuff going on in my life i need to sort out', he replied with - 'sounds like you just need a good shag, ur place or mine?'!!!

POF definitely = Plenty of Fuckmuppets!

Anyway, I'm back to thinking about shagginghanging out with the guy from earlier in the summer (who I also met online but on a somewhat more 'upmarket' site).

Better luck next time! xx

Yoga what was the more upmarket site you used (as know you're in the same region as me from another thread)?

I am not ready for all this malarky just now but am hanging out here to pick up tips :)