Weekends...

[Pickles77]

Does anybody think that if I book a weekend away, and get XP to come along, talk & have a great time it will work? He'll see sense? Want to be a family... Slowly try again?

Or

Am I being a crazy lady?

Im being a crazy lady again aren't I? :(

Yes to ALL of that! But it always works out in the end.
Do you want all us MNers to come on your weekend away instead of that cunt your XP?

FYI... every mother has days when they don't know what to do, get a bit grumpy, etc. Children do get sick and they do tell us they hate us occasionally. This would all be quite normal. The rest of the time we're looking at each other thinking we're the most fabulous things on the planet. :)

From what I remember of your previous posts, he is a dick and you and your baby will be better off without him.

You will be fine with your baby. She is yours and you two will be a lovely little gang. MN will be here for when the going gets tough.

As for your XP, what a shit and it's his loss. I know that doesn't wash with you - I slag my EA on off 'D'P for his behaviour but still love him despite what people say on here. But you'll be fine. More than fine.

I believe you all I'm glad you lot have faith I'm me. More than I do myself. It means so much to me.

A MN holiday- WOW!

If I stop my 4yo DD from doing something, she marches off to her bedroom shouting that she will never give me cuddles EVER AGAIN! And then slams the bedroom door....

But she loves me and we have regular cuddles on the sofa watching tv and I'm so much closer to her since her dad walked out. And you and your DD will be close too as she grows up.

It is the useless fathers who miss out. My DD starts school in September and who will be there for her? Me.

I know your right but I can't help thinking that he's going to have her at weekends and that's going to be the highlights of her life... Fun dad.
FWIW I'm not sure at all about him being a dad, I don't think it will be duck to water...

But having said that, my dad had
Me at weekends and I adore my dad. It was the highlight of my life so
I guess if ive had that happen to me I can try to prevent it IYSWIM

He doesn't have to have her every weekend, it could be every other and even that wouldn't be for a while. I think it's important that mums get time with their DC's at weekends, especially once they are at school. I hate missing every Sunday with my DD. I ha e friends that do every other weekend. I'm going to suggest my STBXH has her every third weekend and every Sunday for now, then when she is a bit older it can be every other weekend.

I also get him to swap days so she doesn't miss out on friends or family parties that are in a Sunday

You will work it out as she grows up

I'm worrying ahead of time aren't I.

Really wish he was here or wish the
Man i thought he was was here

I know, that's the hardest thing. I've cried a lot today. I want my old life back, I want the three of us to be a family again, but I want the man that he used to be, or the man that I thought he was.

Sad as I feel today, I dont want the lying, deceitful cheat that he turned into, he has become a callous, cold hearted man. The sweet lovely man has gone forever, my counsellor has helped me to see that.

A man who can walk out on his child is no man at all.

the men we thought we had are gone and that means we are free to meet someone else, someone better.

But will we? Ever meet anyone?

I'll give you my sholder and a cuddle. I appreciate to advising me when your not
Great yourself

I had 3 DCs under the age of 5 when I met my lovely DH and we've been together now for 10 years and have a DD of our own.
I never thought in a zillion years I'd meet another man, let alone such a gorgeous one!

Lovely story mushroom

Just seen pictures of him in a friends Facebook, out drinking arms around all
These girls. Whilst I put sad pictures of my dog and me on. I've blocked him so didn't think pics of him would come up. Am heartbroken.

Ah you're worrying ahead of time. Take each day as it comes, with plenty of MN to help you through.

A friend of mine had split from her husband (long story which I won't go into in case she is a MN-er) and despaired of meeting anyone, especially as she had 3 young children. She's with a younger man now, and wonderfully happy - they all 5 of them make a great family and the kids have grown up with him being more of a father to them than their own ever was/is.

Block, delete, put the past behind you and enjoy each day. To trot out a platitude - "Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present". x

Just got a email saying my parents should have contacted him but they cba, that im
Lucky his parents even wrote to me. I'm immature, lazy, have never worked for anything.
I know your all right but it bloody hurts.

I think you'll find he is the immature one, he is the one doing the name calling, he is the one who wouldn't face up to reality or the situation and is being mean because you won't do what he wants.

You are being mature, are dealing with the situation in the best way that you can.

ignore it, rise above it. You know its not true. Block his email address.

I'm just sick of trying now.

I either want him to stand up and be a
Family or
I don't want him to see the baby, the thought of him being near my baby as
he is right now makes me feel sick.
I have no choice in that though do I?

I'm really starting to think I should have done what he wanted.... But I know i won't when she arrives.

I'm so sorry to go on and on and on and on

hey, Ive had a shit day feeling sorry for myself, so its good to talk about somebody else's problems! lol.

we all go through this, it really is a rollercoaster. You will get all postive and certain and then you will crash down again, then go up again! but the more that time goes by you will start to have more highs than lows. Mine is set off each time I see the solicitor or get a letter from them.

Regarding access, that will be sorted once baby is born if he wants to see her. you will agree it between yourselves, or if you cant, he will have to take you to court.

While your baby is breastfeeding I would imagine he wouldnt be able to take her any where for a while. He certainly wouldnt be able to take her overnight until she was older. then try and see that as a good thing. i cant wait for my STBXH to get his own place so he can then have DD overnight. It will be nice to be able to go out without worrying about a babysitter. Try and see the positives in it.

Thanks sky, I know u make sense. I just feel so so low. It's awful,

my decree nisi is being filed at the court on Tuesday and I could be divorced by the end of August, although I wont be as there is no way that the mortgage/finances will be sorted by then.

But it shocks me to think that I was happily married at the end of Feb (or so I thought) and 6 months later I could be divorced. Life is so bloody strange sometimes. You just never know what is going to happen next and it can change in the blink of an eye. If you had told me at Christmas that this time next year I will be divorced I would never have believed it!!

Your life will be so different in 6 months time.... and for the better too

I hope so.

No no no no no no. You are setting yourself up for more heartache. Sorry love but you are. Maybe we need a 'single and pregnant and strong' thread? I'd be there x

I know & I feel awful