New man - landline/email?

[theendishere]

Been seeing some a few weeks - only have his mob number. He took longer than usual to reply to a text and it occurred to me that if phone broke or something, no way of contacting eachother, so asked him for his landline/email address. He hasn't given them to me and (apprently jokingly) called me a stalker...
was i wrong to ask?

No really into ONS

Lueji - I know that's what seems wierd - maybe he was just joking? He's told me his kids names, where they're ay school and lots of other things so i just don;t know
I do actually believe him re the last gf/sex

hmm. surely the keeping it up depends on who you are with rather than the condom....???

No, not sure about that - if d was up, until the condom went on!!

Get a vibrator and sort yourself out for a while. You don't need another man when the last one hasn't even moved out yet, least of all one who is causing this much head fuckery before you've even had sex.

well said akinac...
were you talking about dH there? sorry i didnt understand...

Thanks AKIss. Shouldnt be like this should it. Ass someone said if he was going to give me the number etc tomorrow, why the hell not do it tonight without the 'stalker' comments

Its 40 mins since his test now and i've not replied and hes not sent anymore. Bugger, what do i do tomorrow. he has a bday pressie at his house from me - suppose he texts/call to say anthing...

the fact that you are hanging on to when the last text was etc again rings alarm bells with me... you not totally comfortable with this.. i suppose that is probably natural at the beginning... tomorrow you could call to say happy birthday.. or he may call first to say thanks... simple....

I know peppa - it's all a bit scary...
I'll see if he calls, and if do be friendly but not talk about any of this, then think i'll distance myself from him for a while...

oh teis.. i feel for you.. but i can see from the start this is a no brainer.. it would be scary as you have just split with ex and are clinging onto something else which in the long run may make it harder... anyhow.. get some sleep. let us know how it goes and do NOT lose yourself in this....

thanks peppa :)

well i am talking from experience. It may well be that you need to go through this as i have and may well again.. its all a learning experience. My guess is you need to find out who you are.. you testing the water... all i can say is be careful and keep posting. don't question yourself and certainly don't make room for someone who is making you doubt yourself or be unhappy. be assertive from the start and ask yourself what it is your REALLY want/need :-)

You don't know this guy. He's as weird as fuck!

Honestly, you need to move on. Fast.

Don't see him, don't call him, just let it die a death.

5 weeks is no time at all to know who he is, and the alarm bells are already deafening.

You're not savvy enough just yet to spot the wrong uns. Take your time set boundaries and insist on them all the way, but not with this guy, he needs to go.

Umm how do you know that he's actually had the test? He could tell you anything and, from the sound of him, I bet he has just told you that so that you'll sleep with him.

He should be at the courting stage now, not calling you a stalker!

He said he'd show me the results so guess i would know if he had the test.
Maybe it was just a joke? somethimes easy to misunderstand by text...
I think i'll send him a 'happy birthday' text later and leave it at that for now?

Why don't you just not text him for a few days?

You don't need a man. If you think you do, please please go and get yourself some counselling first.

If you are still wavering read red flag thread first.

Mummy - no i don't think i 'need' a man at all!
Just giving him the benefit of the doubt and it is his birthday today...
Not sure what's happened with him quite falls in the same league as the 'red flag' thread!!

I just think he sounds like a bit of a head-ache to be honest op. The beginning of relationships should be exciting and fun - you should be feeling wonderful!

I think it's perfectly reasonable to just send him a happy birthday text today, then back right off and let it fizzle out.

My current cold has lasted longer than your relationship

You've been seeing him for a 'few weeks'. This is really not a long time. Why do you need a landline number? I would be wary of giving it to a new person who could be perfectly sane - or a complete bunny boiler - if it didn't work out.

Op I agree- why on earth couldnt he have given you his email/landline yesterday rather than putting you off again. Sounds very controlling. And as for calling you a stalker...

Agree with peppa it's a learning experience, and although I think it's normal to be a bit hyper over vigilant in early stages to people's behaviour this doesn't sound right and I'd mirror, manoeuvre, signal out of this situation ASAP.

Have done the happy birthday text and rightly or wrongly gave him my email/number. he then emailed me (therfore giving me his email ad) however the surname isn't the full version of what told me his name was...
have questioned it but if if reply isn't plausiable, will def leave things right there.
And yes, i probably am over vigilant - been lied to and misled alot by stbx h

OP you shouldn't have to question everything honey.

I don't like his jokes.

In fact I don't like him.

He replied and said he's given me a footbal nickname and said his name waas what i thought it was. FFS I even explained to him that stbx had messed with my head...