Should I even be bothering with this or ditching him?

[BoredRoom]

I have a fairly new boyfriend, have been seeing him for 4/5 months. He lives alone, no kids and I see him around 2 or 3 times a week. Taking it slowly I suppose but several things bother me - this is one of them.

I have child free weekends but we NEVER spend the whole night together. He will come here or I will go there and we watch a film , have sex and then I come home. Usually at about 11pm as he likes to be in bed around then as he has an early start due to a consuming weekend hobby that he usually does on both days of the weekend. The reason I don't stay is because he likes 8 hours of full uninterrupted sleep and me next to him disturbs this.

I feel a bit weird about this. I mean, it's not normal to have a boyfriend and never sleep the whole night together is it? I haven't really said anything although he probably knows I think it's a little unusual. And anyway, what is the point? He would more than likely 'let' me stay but it wouldn't have been his choice would it?

There are other issues too but that, for now, is the one currently bugging me.

I'm wondering if you have been servicing my dh

And you stay with him because.....

I would dump him just for the golf! Seriously, he sounds like an arsehole and a bore, get rid!

'I eat cake in secret'

You're already feeling guilty for doing perfectly normal things that make you happy. And lots of things about the relationship are stressing you out. Get rid - you can do so much better than this.

Am I getting deja vu here? I'm sure I remember a very similar thread. Same bloke? Or are there lots of obsessive hobby/sleep/exercise types out there with low libidos?

And soya milk. I know a lot about that now.

Yes, sanitised is a good word.

I have never eaten one meal round his house. He would make me eat steamed rice and cod.

We do go out from time to time..cinema or a meal. Or sometimes a drink. He has a pint and a half and no more because ' he doesn't like to drink too much '

'I would dump him just for the golf!'

Me too! I'm picturing Nick Ferrari in a Pringle jumper

What are his good points?

He sounds grim, I wouldn't bother.

He would bore me to tears.

Where's the passion?

The curling up and talking after sex just because you can?

The getting a bit tipsy and doing stupid stuff?

I eat cake in secret

I am horrified at this. Cake is a very important part of life. Choose cake.

Seriously, he sounds very ...ungenerous, to put it mildly. I don't think there will ever be any real space for you in his life. And the minute you 'give him grief', i.e. actually expect to have some of your needs met, or some emotional support, or even just some compromise, he'll be off.

My ex boyfriend was exactly the same. A complete golf and gym freak, weird about food etc.

GET RID!!!

Is his hobby golf?

Jeez, Bored. Go and find someone you can sleep with and enjoy cake with. There are lots of men out there that wouldn't even notice a few pounds and certainly wouldn't make a deal out of it.

All the time you spend with this oddball could be spent in restaurants with interesting men...

Good points?

Reliable, steadfast, definitely not a player, can be quite amusing, would come and wire a plug if I asked him to.

Fuck that shit op, he sounds like a boring Twat imo. Get your arse out of there.

Wire your own plug.

Rent a funny film.

And get rid of the tosser.

ha ha ha at ' Nick Ferrari in a pringle jumper '

'Reliable, steadfast, definitely not a player, can be quite amusing, would come and wire a plug if I asked him to'

He sounds like someone who might be alright to know as an acquaintance. Not as a partner. He does sound boring and very selfish.

Re the films.. that is another point!

We watch a lot of films. Two a week on average. They are always ones he has chosen < via lovefilm > I have made three film suggestions. He added them to the list but said he wasn't keen to watch them as they didn't sound like his thing or he didn't like such and such an actor. So, as of yet, we have not watched them.

golf?

I'd come and wire a plug in if you asked me to - then go halves with you on the most enormous chocolate fudge cake we could find

I'm gearing myself up to dump him I suppose.

I wanted it to work.

I make bad men choices as a rule, it has to be said. Lose perspective a bit and cannot see clearly when I am in the right.

Blimey, total twunt.

Run! highly critical and judgemental, not too keen on sex and likes it that you don't give him any grief. What a charmer he sounds.