sex while asleep

[silver999]

my partner woke me up by having sex with me, I was really shocked at what was happening and not sure what to do or think about what has happened.
I told my friend but she just laughed about it, any advice? thanks.

I'm sorry for the posters above that they were raped when their naivety was taken advantage of.

I was reading their experiences and remember that, when I was at uni, I "got off with" and stayed the night with many young men. a lot was done in some cases, but in every single case, I didn't have to defend myself against them
Badly worded, I'm sorry. What I mean is that I was never raped.
I never had sex with any of them.
Some asked if i wanted to and accepted my "no" but most didn't even ask (ie took it as far as we both wanted to go)

I sat here and the phrase "lucky to have not met upon a rapist" sprang to mind.
:( that I've heard experiences from other people that make me feel "lucky" I only met real decent men.
:(

and bug hugs to all of you :(

I don't see how its a personal attack. It would have been a personal attack if I'd typed "fuck off you rape apologist, victim blaming wanker" but I've never had a fuck off deleted before, I always thought mners were more robust than that.

But hey,m this thread has stirred up some dormant rage and I've had a shit day so I might be feeling a tad tetchy.

I have had a fuck off deleted, Oracle. I guess it depends if it is reported.

To be fair to MNHQ, they do only look at posts that are reported, and with a thread this long one or two might go unreported or unnoticed.

Nickel
Isn't it fecking AWFUL that I nodded and thought myself lucky never to have been raped. Never to have met a rapist, when so many other women have.

It should be a given.

Hello

Am feeling ok thank you and thank you for asking. Had a bit of a wobble last night thinking that perhaps my memories are warped, but am pretty sure they're not

Is a difficult subject and posting/reading this thread has brought it all back for me. That's not necessarily a bad thing but I think I will leave it there for now as I need space and headroom to think about everything that happened (and grieve I think for what could have been and how I could have been without these things happening) and with 2 dc and a full time job that's not happening for a while

Thank you again to everyone for being so nice, it means a lot to me.

I'm off now to go and ask a question about sewing - back to normality

I'm glad you're doing ok Puffins :)

I've had four deletions and I haven't a clue why. I can't remember what they said now but I'm generally really careful not to personally attack posters even when their posts are vile - I've never had a deletion before today.

(((hugs))) to those of you who have shared your stories. I believe you x

running I have been loving your work on this thread, btw

Puffins
I believe you

Take care

I've had a Fuck Off post deleted. I think that was all it said - it was on one of those jokey late-night insult threads (joke not appreciated, evidently.)

I am not sure WorriedBetty is quite the rape apologist she seemed. If I'm right, she may have felt exposed by last night's posts - not as in "expose the villain" but as in vulnerable. Tine will tell, I suppose.

Anyways. We move on. Continued thanks to all who wrote their own experiences.

nickel, I'm very taken by Predator theory, which basically says a very large proportion of sexual assaults are carried out by a very small proportion of men. It ties in with my own experience that the majority of men are the opposite of predatory on vulnerable women.

I'd be interested in a discussion of how the predatory minority have managed to infect the expectations of both men and women ("Don't be vulnerable!" and "Men are pigs!"), while being simultaneously protected by that same society ("Oh, it's nothing!" or "He didn't mean it!"). I guess that's a topic for FWR really ...

I've come back to this thread a couple of times today to read again. I was very upset last night - didn't help that I've been home alone wiht the DCs for the last week. However, being able to say that what happened to me was rape is a weight off me in a weird way IYSWIM. I'm probably not making much sense, but I can call it by it's proper name, it wasn't my fault and lots of lovely people here have said they believe me. I am fine and will be fine and I really appreciate the kindness of many of the posters on this thread.

take care avon and puffins (and everyone else who has been through this)

It makes perfect sense, Avon :)

Puffin, I hope you manage to find a quiet comfy space to process your feelings, if you need to (or ramble on here; that often helps!)

Has anyone listened to this serial drama this week: www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b01h5xcn/15_Minute_Drama_Not_a_Love_Story_Episode_1/
Just listening to the last episode now so don't know how it ends but it reminded me of this thread.

I was considering starting a thread in OTBT for posters who have realised that their experiences were more actually rape, if anyone fancies it (wrong words, but, you know what I mean)

Hi Avon. What you said makes a lot of sense. How are you feeling today?

Avon
I believe you

((hugs)) to all

Why in OTBT Oracle?

just to discourage trolls posters who want to post myths.

I was just thinking it might be better in a more visible place if you're hoping to attract people who might find it helpful. If it's for people who see this thread, then I suppose OTBT makes sense.

I was considering starting it, then PMing the posters who wish to use it. I just dont want to attract the posters who would question our memories/experiences.

Sounds good to me Oracle.

ok, about to have dinner, but I will start it in a bit.

all who want a link, say yay.