Welcome to the Turning Tavern III

[Crushinghard]

A continuation of the TTII thread for women unexpectedly finding themselves attracted to other women.

clears*

overdoing it*

Yes make sure you phone her, keep that contact going. What a bugger though.

Antibios have worked before yes, I had 4 chest infections last year, and this will be my second this year. Am getting really fed up with it now. No chance of childcare so just have to muddle through, although their Dad is very good and helps when he can. I take supplements and eat well etc, baffled why i keep getting ill. Maybe scan next week will throw some light on it.

I've not heard from WIQ in response to my 'are you free for a drink next weekend' email. Not sure if I'm surprised or not!

your wiq may be away for bank hols. This demamds a response so I doubt that she's seen it. Though I won't be surprised if she says she's too busy or smth (well, you know my take on yr wiq).
Maybe your house is damp/cold? or you tend to dress too lightly - and it's been COLD last week. ASk your ex to help out, I hope he did/does this long weekend. I keep getting some mild throat virus which I'm fed up with too - it's not as bad as to stay at home but really saps energy.
It is a bugger. I haven't een her for two weeks now and was really hoping for next weekend as 2-3 weeks is my limit of being ok with it, but now it meabs 5 weeks . Yes, I think i will have to stop by before that anyway, even though it can only be a very short visit.

it's actually lucky she's away for a week as originally she planned for two weeks. I wonder if she misses me a tiny bit at least, when it's weeks. I think she does, but prob no more than 'a bit'.

5 weeks seems like a lifetime, you must arrange something in the meantime! Even if just a chat on the phone.

Yes DCs Dad has been helping, which has been great. I think WIQ has been around this weekend, I drove past hers this morning on my way to supermarket for painkillers (her house is on my way into town, honest, I haven't descended to doing creepy drive-pasts yet ) and her car was there. Yes I am expecting her to knock me back but if she doesn't respond at all.....aargh. I've got no idea what's going on in her head, how she is with me in person and how she is with me via email are almost 2 different things. I've emailed her twice in 7 days, only once about going for a drink so I don't think she can say I'm being pushy. Could she? She was the one who said about going out again when we were out. I was much cooler towards her on the night out than she was towards me.

Oh balls!

You should ask her, cheekily, if she misses you.

driving by, eh? no I believe you, though it's a bugger having her house on the way, reminding you of her every time! if she's in she's probably doing things and not bothered with emails - she may well have strated dating btw! As i said before, some women enjoy a bit of fantasising but aaaare horrified at acting on it (i.e. they don't want to) - and fantasising can come across as being flirty and attracted and thinking of kissing someone for a threill. I did that a couple of times in my 20s with 2-3 girls, but definately wouldn't go any further than thinking of a kiss - I could come cross at that moment as really attracted (looking into their eyes, at their mouth) - she may be the same. I don't do it anymore at all. haven'y done for ages. Wiq (mine) is different as i care about her and want her, it's not non-caring bit of fantasy (as your wiq may be doing).
I'll phone tomorrow, that's agreed with her vaguely. I may try and see her briefly this week but it all depends whether she's around in two hours that i can do it (have appointments elsewhere). After that she's away and then we'll see. NO way will i go 5 weeks. Yo know, I will try and jokingly ask about missing me after she's back, not seriously though as that will scare her off!

well you say 5 weeks lifetime - but how do you manage with even longer gaps? I s'pose i feel more intense though, being much more contact/getting to know her than you had with yours.

btw her car may be there if she went away abroad. did you not feel tempted to ring the bell and chat for five min?

Ha! No I don't think she's the sort that would welcome an unexpected visitor. If she had gone anywhere she would've had to drive to station/airport so no, I think she probably is at home.

The huge gaps we had in contact were last year/beginning of this year, when as far as I was concerned the whole thing was a no-go and I was barely thinking about her. Well, trying hard not to think about her. And I've plenty to occupy myself with, so it didn't seem so bad. The last few weeks have been hard because she's started it all up again - if nothing is going to come of it and I' just going to get the silent treatment now, tbh I wish she'd just left me alone and not uttered those fateful words 'we'll go for that drink'. Bah!

Fingers crossed you do get to see your WIQ this week.

tbh, the silent treatment or a clear 'no' by email would be easier on you then if she was to prolong this horrid on and off contact and no-replies! I couldn't stand it for sure. It's bad that you haven't taken her number (even though we all DID advise) - I knew that without the number same all story would repeat..If she does reply in some positive vein do take the number asap while she's in good mood (although if I were you I would let her go altogether, but I mean if you still feel compelled to try). As to wishing she hasn't suggested drinks - yes, exactly, but just shows that she's flippant with people (unless she's REALLY interested), and you want someone considerate/thoughtful.
Good that you are seeing a Dr tomorrow at least will start feeling better overall.

boring q.: Is your town small and safe? re leaving a car at a station for days unattended (or paying for it if it's a better one)? where i am most people take taxis to airport (same as in lond).

yes I think most people would happily leave their cars at our station for a few days. Also I think (if memory serves) she's working today, so hasn't had a long weekend like some. So likely she is at home.

I asked her once for her phone number in an email, and that's one she hasn't replied to I also think (although this is probably just because I feel unwell and a bit gah) that if she doesn't reply to my last email by the end of the week I'll email her once more and really say what I think. That is, she's taking the mickey.

yes, polly I do remeber you asked for the number in an email (I'm on the ball, y'know ). But it was a big mistake notto ask in person, as then the usual palaver with emails was bound to happen. The way she replied before, she may well take a week or more to reply, I think she will eventually as she's not as rude as to completely ingnore - but I know that you were hoping that things would change after those drinks! I knew they wouldn't after her non-response to your phone number email. Not that I was hopeful even before that, but that just confirmed it. Probaby she will reply by end of the week - but it's not good enough, is it? you could tell her off, but she will no doubt say 'I told you i weren't gay' to which of course you could argue that the signals were misleading - and she did suggest getting drunk soon herself, so hopefully this will lead to some clear conclusion. Maybe she'll explain her behaviour. But this is much better than her replying 'sorry , was busy, let's do the drinks soon' andthen again happily disappearing for weeks! you must then write: 'I must have your number if we are going for the drinks, as i get very frustrated/fed up with you email habits!' (be bold, this won't put her off in itself at all).

Oh yes, bold is the way to go TBH,I wouldn't want a friendship with someone who's so unreliable and happily leaves people dangling for ages (unless she just saves that treatment for me!) so I can't be bothered any more to be especially polite. If I really don't hear before the end of the week, if and when I do hear from her I'll be saying sorry, I can't be bothered with this. She's not the only one who is busy and has other things to think about.

I really wish I had asked for her number when I was with her. I just completely forgot (d'oh)

polly - exactly! you can't believe how frustrating she made it for me even, just to follow it! this what made me angry - this 'dangling' you withoiut responses, it's not polite or acceptable whether with friends or in romantic sense. So pleased you are now seeing it clearly that you shouldn't make excuses for her, and what you say (sorry can't be bothered) is exactly what you should say to her. It will give a choice of either leaving it altogether, or behaving with respect and fast!

this is*

give HER a choice*

"I need oxygen, oxygen to breathe...can you bring some round please and administer it" (Polly to her WIQ)

Response from WIQ (with her fingers in her ears) "lalala I can't hear you."

I think if I cough much more the top of my head is going to come clean off. And that'll be messy.

Bloody hell. You could always kidnap the wheel of her car and leave a ransom note.

As an aside, The Chancer has recently made herself single (found out via third party).

That's thoughtful of her i take it you've not heard any more from her since you gave her a talking to?

Not a thing.