The Brave Babes Battle Bus - On Their Way To............... Amarillo?

[Mouseface]

.............. sorry, ran out of ideas tonight!

Hello, tis me, Mouse and I have a very abusive relationship with alcohol, vodka in particular.

Welcome to the Battle Bus, full of totally Brave Babes all on their own personal journey to sobriety. Some are there, some are still on their way and some aren't quite ready yet but stay on the Bus for a good old natter

Wherever you are in your quest to get back control of your drinking, we've all been there too so you're not alone, not by a long shot.

Come take a seat and say hello.

If you'd like to know the history behind this amazing journey, you can follow the links back HERE

See you soon x

Hi brave babes, just to let you know I haven't disappeared - I do have a habit of hopping on the bus for a few days and then not being heard of for a year which I'm dtermined not to do this time. I managed to get past day 4 last week which is the first time for about a year. I did drink on Friday and saturday although did manage to keep it under control eg no falling over. I was dying with flu over weekend so lierally had a couple on Sunday and Monday just because I was feeling so miserable and I'm back on day 4 again. I'm really determined not to stop sliding backwards like I usually do ie 4 AF days a week, then 3, then 2..... I will continue to do the 4AF days until it begins to feel like second nature and then see if I can build it up to 5. I've actually felt a bit boingy this week at times and I do feel that there's been a shift in my thinking - I've actually found myself thinking "hooray I get to read my book tonight and wake up with a lovely clear head" rather than "Oh God, how on earth am I going to survive without a drink?" Without wanting to tempt fate, I do feel cautiously optimistic this time round and this bus is a great help. I think of all of you lots, you're such an inspirational bunch. Will post again this evening. have a good day, brave babes.

Upsy "hooray I get to read my book tonight and wake up with a lovely clear head" - what better reason is there not to drink? Nice to hear from you and keep on keeping on.

Drinking last night has made me even more determined to stop. Does that make sense? Help suggested that I see it as research, the before, during and after. I suppose before I started I was equally scared/excited about drinking, during I was my usual euphoric drinking self but by bedtime I felt like crap and today I don't feel part of the human race and it'll get worse as the day goes on. It's all so predictable and demoralising but I've just had my blood tests so antabuse here we come. In the meantime I won't be drinking today.

What plans for today "Truth", more mixed-up housework? Hope you enjoyed your dog walk Mia and Green thanks for sharing your story with us. Don't blame yourself for how you felt towards your dad, my brother is a recovering alcoholic and I had to keep away from him because of the disgust I felt. You had/have love in your heart for your father and that's so positive - he just made it impossible for you to show him. Catch you all later x

Morning Babes

Hi Soma No housework for me today, DH is home so he will potter about at home whilst I do the food shop (avoiding the wine aisle) and then I am going underwear shopping. Not overly looking forward to it because I feel so overweight and grotesque. Have only lost a pound this week. A fecking pound All that healthy eating, no alcohol and exercise every day. Ho hum.
Not looking forward to this weekend. DH is working so my normal routine would be to have a glass of wine on the go. The next 2 days seem to stretch far out in front of me, need to make some plans. Hopefully the weather will be ok to take the DC to the park.
That is good news re the Antabuse, when do you start? Today is a new day, you can't change what happened yesterday. Never give up giving up.

Happy Fridy everyone

First, hugs to mia for telling us the story about your father. It sounds like it was a very difficult time for everyone.

I have to thank you babes again! I wasn't going to drink last night, it was AFD and anyway there was no wine in the house. I just felt so tired and thought it was going to be a miserable evening.

Something popped into my head that a babe had said on here (thank you whoever it was) called HALT. I can't remember what the acronym stands for, but I thought 'tired' must be part of it.

I normally avoid napping during the day, insomniacs are told NEVER nap because it disrupts your sleep pattern. Anyway, I decided to give it a go, and woke up an hour later feeling so much better!

So instead of spending the evening feeling exhausted and thinking 'I can't wait till Friday when I can have a drink', I was thinking 'It really is too awkward to try and get in some booze on a Friday - maybe I won't have any tomorrow and just leave it till the weekend...' !!!

Hi guys

I am new on here and I really hope that you can help me.

I have been drinking pretty heavily and it it has really got out of control again this week.

Even on a good week I am upto about 50-60 units a week yes that's a good week!

I am long term sufferer with depression and take fluoxetine I have not really spoken to anyone about my drinking expect my DH we have had a conversation this morning which was good but he does not want me to share it with anyone else so really all i have is him and myself.

I have not really told my GP about the extent of my drinking and tbh I am scared to as I have two young children - a ds and a dd. We live in a nice close community and I work locally in a local firm so everyone knows us and the kids! We cant go anywhere without seeing people we know.

The depression this week has been terrible after all the drinking and I am at the end of my tether.

I have followed these threads on and off for a while and Mouse MIFLAw Venus and Jesus I think you are all great.

Well I am a very shy person so am a bit dubious about joining in the thread proper and do not feel very confident doing so and that is why I have not posted in the past but if anyone of you could pm me that would be ideal and maybe share a few emails etc

Thank you very much for reading this

chopin

Welcome Chopin

I was a 90 unit a week girl, vodka was my weapon of choice and I could easily nail more if I didn't pass out but that's me, let's talk about you.

I'm going to PM you as you asked, but trust me when I tell you, if you're looking for support in stopping or reducing your drinking, you are in the right place and any one of the Babes aboard or lurking will tell you that.

We're the only thread on MN that has been around this long, supporting those who drink, don't, can't won't, whatever. Anything goes on here because we are all so very different people sharing the same worry; alcohol.

Maybe have a read over some of the other BB threads and see what you think?

Mouse x

NEW THREAD - As always, please fill this one first so that we don't leave anyone behind or miss a new poster

Thank you lovely Babes xx

Welcome chopin

Thank You for joining us, It is a brave step admitting a problem but please believe me when I say we are all just like YOU :)
Please do not be afraid to post everyone is so lovely here, You will never be judged and can get alot of help from these Brave Babes x

Wishing Everyone a wonderful weekend. I am off to my Caravan now till Sunday. (5 kids in tow so wish me luck lol)

I can not promise myself I wont have a drink this weekend as I know I have a bottle of Wine chilling in the fridge there and I know the kids will want to go to the club house on a night but I am really really going to try my best not to!! Every other friday I feel like I cant wait to get there to have a drink but I feel different today, I cant wait to get there to hit the beach tomorrow with the kids!

I have so much Energy this morning, I'm rushing around doing all my jobs I havnt done for weeks, I cant sit Down.....Whats going on? [confused} (Im not knocking it though, its gooood)

Have a great weekend x

Welcome chopin I also am quite shy (except when I've had a drink!) but the babes on here have made me very welcome.

And there is no criticism or blame just loads of support and great advice!

boing!!

welcome welcome chopin! you sound quite similar to how i was, i was certainly drinking about that amount and taking fluxotine - i was able to drop the fluxotine after about 7 or 8 months of soberity (i think it was about that long, i cant remember exactly) the absence of the alcohol meant that the fluxotine could actually do its job!, who knew! im quite happy to pm you, but honestly, we are quite a friendly lot, you have nothing to say that can shock us or make us judge you because we are all in the same boat (or bus!)

Angel - It's going to be glorious weather tomorrow, I'm seriously thinking of getting DH to do what he needs to in the morning and head off somewhere before lunch. I am sooooooooooooooo sick of painting and just for once, it would be great to get out as a family on a sunshiny day.

About you drinking? Take the pressure off. Worry about drinking when it's right in front of you, not before. If you DO drink, take your time. There's no race to finish a bottle, maybe just taste the wine this time. Not use it to get that 'hit', savour the craftsmanship that went into making it.

Well, assuming it's not Lambrini! Have a lovely weekend Angel xx

Truth a pound in a week is fine, in fact losing between 1-2 pounds per week is considered the best way to maintain long-term weight gain.

Welcome Chopin, I'd go and see my GP if I were you - I did and she's been really helpful. Don't worry about having children, just emphasise that you don't drink around them and are absolutely safe with them. And as the others have said, you can say anything on here and no-one will judge - it's all about compassion and understanding.

You're shy Joey? Could have fooled me? :)

soma shy in real life! Its much easier on here...

I'm not going to be online this weekend, so hope you all manage to stay on the bus.

I feel pretty confident right now, even to the state where I can't be bothered searching out where to buy my mini-bottles. As venus has said, it's hard work.

I hope I can manage without your support, but you've given me some good tips and ideas. HALT and cleaning your teeth twice, and buying new knickers. Not sure what new knickeres has to do with being sober, but mouse said so, therefore it must be true.

mia, venus, faire, soma, grey, celery, JWN, demented to you all

Truth - I shan't gloat and tell you that I've lost a stone in about 6/7 weeks then shall I?

The fact that you are losing in itself is fantastic. It will happen, you will lose more, the more that you don't drink.

Each glass of wine has around (125ml glass, not a home glass ) 85 calories in it, plus the sugars and the carbs...... if you're sat not burning those calories/carbs off, the weight is going to go nowhere.

Every alcoholic drink has calories, some have no carbs (vodka, gin, white rum) but wine is really bad for empty calories and sugar.

That's why I stopped drinking wine altogether when I started the diet. I must admit that I do miss an ice cold glass of Pinot at the end of the day. BUT...I want to lose weight much more than I want to drink.

I have a stone to go and then I'll be back to where I want to be. If I can do that by the time the Baptism is here, I'll be super happy, if not, oh well, I'll still be happy with losing as much as I can.

Hi Chopin welcome to the bus :) I have been here for a few weeks. I have managed to cut down on my drinking but am not going for complete abstinence.

I also have depression, plus I have bipolar. This is a fantastic, non judgemental place. I have found it really helpful. It is great to know one is not alone.

Hi Chopin I was scared when I first posted on the Bus a year ago and felt very shy. I didn't come back till this week but I am finding it easier this time.

Mouse Tell me your secret with your weight loss!
I know a pound is fine, and if it comes off slowly or never comes off I am still healthier than I was 11 days ago.
It has been such a lovely day, wish I could have a nice glass of cold dry white wine, but I know I can't right now. I wonder if I will ever be able to have the odd glass?

Greyhound It really is wonderful to not feel alone isn't it? Where else could have admitted that I had had 80 bottles hidden around the house and received nothing but love and support?
Angel Hope you have a wonderful weekend. Am very envious of you having a caravan to go to regularly. Enjoy yourself

Truth - please don't torture yourself with the 'ifs' of drinking.

You'll always be able to enjoy a glass of cold, white wine................. ti's the other 8 that will do the damage.

For now, you have to think about today, right now. Worry about 5pm at 5pm. Worry about your next surge of cravings when they happen.

Why not treat yourself to something fab tonight? There are some gorgeous soft drinks around. And some chocolate maybe? A nice DVD, hot bath with smellies in? Do your nails sober, have a sit out in the garden with a book for half an hour.....

Have anything other than a drink.

I need to go out but will be back later for the Friday Night Attack of the Cravings for those who they hit.

Try and keep busy..... try to plan your night, just tonight, around something other than drinking.

And, if you DO drink, think long and hard about what tomorrow will bring. xx

Truth Until I found this thread, I felt alone. I didn't know anyone else who binned a bagful of bottles every few days, hoping that no neighbours would see me chucking them in outside bin.

I didn't know anyone else who panicked if there were 'only' two bottles of wine in the house, or who knew the exact percentage of alcohol in every single bottle of cheap wine at the supermarket, or who woke in the night in a panic about how much I had drunk the previous evening.

I didn't know anyone who obsessed about drink all the time or who counted down the minutes until it was okay to open the first bottle.

I reckon I have consumed thousands upon thousands of bottles, easily, over the last 20 or so years since this became a problem. At first, I would have one bottle of wine in my flat and drink half of it. I would drink the rest the following night. Then, before I knew it, I buying more and more bottles of the wretched stuff. I would take sickies from work because I was too hungover to go in.

The only long period of time I've had 'off' from drinking was a long spell in hospital for depression in my 20s and during my pregnancy with my ds. Even during my pregnancy, I would have a glass or two a week and once secretly downed most of a bottle one afternoon. I felt so guilty about that, worrying that I was poisoning my precious baby through my own selfishness.

This week I did buy a lot of booze. However, I have managed, somehow, to cut my drinking down and something has definitely changed. I can only continue the fight.

Hi everyone.

Greyhound cross posted with you, which makes my invitation to the sidecar sound grossly inapropriate!

It's very interesting, I talk to you lot in my head all the time, even when I don't post. I feel as if I've found a group of like-minded souls who would never judge me. It's a great help :)

I'm not doing well, for the first time ever I've drunk the day after having drunk too much and that would suggest that I'm an everyday drinker (one bottle at least). I went to the pub just now, before DD gets home,and scribbled in my diary, and it's always about how shy and different and worthless I felt as a teen/young woman. And now I drink because I just LOVE the feeling if being off my head. I'm not giving up though because I know there are an amazing clever, self-aware and humorous group of women out there. I'm reaching out to you for help tonight, I don't want this to kill me and I know there is a better way to happiness xx Sorry I can't help anyone else but maybe someone can relate and know there is hope x

Soma

How can we help you lovely? What do you need from us? We could tell you to stop drinking, to brush your teeth twice, go to bed early...........

BUT will that make you stop? Do you want to stop?

You are such a lovely person, you have offered so much to us by posting kind words, you've told us about you, you've shared parts of your life with us, you've laughed with us, and maybe at some of us !

Why did you pick up today? What was your trigger, do you know?

You are worth more than this, even if you don't agree with me. I know that you are, I know that you care about yourself, your life, your future because you are HERE.

We all know what happens when we drink, more than one or two spells some form of hangover, sickness, regret, emotional torture........... the list is endless so why do we do it?

What do you want to do? Do you want to drink some more tonight? How much more? Do you want to pass out once DD is in bed?

Can you come and sit with us for a while and just be? Maybe not have another drink until half past seven?

Why do you think you did that? I know from what you've said that you don't usually drink 'the day after', so what's different? Do you think it's because you stopped yesterday and feel like you're 'owed' getting trolleyed, in some way?

Damage limitation... where's DD now? Have you stopped after a visit to the pub, or are you carrying on at home? What's your plan now?