A while ago my husband was looking at porn on the internet. I was very upset about it, not just because he was looking at it, but because of my feelings about porn in general. Plus, I have a much higher sex drive than him and am much more 'advernturous' than him, so it's not like he couldn't come to me if he wanted sex or had a specific fantasy etc. He agreed him looking at porn was offensive to me and he didn't know why he looked at it etc and he didn't need to and wouldn't again.
Fast forward a year or so and he lent me his mobile to look online and a porn site came up in the history. I immediately asked him about it and he did the usual defensive behaviour, got a bit angry, didn't know why he looked at it etc etc.
Then I found out he had met up with an ex girlfriend of a friend of his on a night out while he was away and they had been messaging each other on Facebook. He hadn't done anything 'obvious' but she was extremely flirty with him and he was flirting back, albeit without actually saying he wanted to shag her. He deleted all his female friends from Facebook after that (no need for that IMO) and had a complete paddy about it. It was never really resolved.
Then last week (and I know it was a bad idea!) I looked on his phone as he'd left it on the side and he has been acting oddly lately. There was a Facebook conversation with an old flame of his and again, he hadn't said anything untoward, but there was obvious flirting going on and he was encouraging it and there were messages from her at 2am etc.
I admitted to him last night that I'd seen the messages and he had a go at me for looking at his phone. I agreed I shouldn't have done, but he obviously wanted to keep this from me. I know full well that if the situation were reversed and I was messaging an old flame he would be very upset about it, he can be a little jealous and insecure, although he has no reason to be. He stormed out last night and he is working today so we can't talk, but he says he is staying at work (he has accomodation there) and doesn't want to speak to me/text me. I think it's more a case of he can't justify his behaviour and so just wants to avoid the issue.
I always completely trusted him before all this and now I'm not sure what else he is hiding. 