Time wasters need not apply, Soul Soothers come hither Dating Chat Part 11

[hatesponge]

Ta-da! Think this is the first one I've started.

I am still feeling somewhat feisty. Told my team off at work for being too noisy and was generally stroppy. Might have to go and start a row in AIBU or something!

So, dating, as you were etc

Not forgetting of course that I have a second date at the weekend!

I totally agree loves far too personal. Therefore, I can never get serious either, cos you can guarantee at some point the new husband would want to stay over

I had two tutors who were married but lived separately. They may still do.

DD is 6 :)

I am vaguely thinking about plans for my 40th so only another 3 and a bit years to go there (am considering going interailing. On my own )

I'm avidly vaguely planning my 50th which is in 3 and a bit years. I'm planning on a weekend away with DD, if I can manage to stay 'cool' enough for to want to be around me. Failing that I will hold a flower arranging party

Married and living separately is good, but that might involve sleepovers. Not good.

Have to be said, it has to be a fit hunk, whose face isn't important, but I need to be able to look at his body and have a good grope right now there is one person I could see myself waking up next to. But the 19year old was fun. LOL

MLM fit hunks, never mind fit faces, are pretty thin on the ground when you get to my age. I do my survey once a week, from my seat in my favourite little cafe. Spreadsheet is so far lacking in the '45+ fit hunk' column. I wasted my potential 'fit hunk' years being with a man who looked and acted like a 40 year old the day he was born.

I guess time is on my side there. Maybe I was lucky enough to get quite a bit of life experience early on. Never ever get married again, or let anyone change me or try to, I won't change, I am me, so either accept it or get out ny life.

Time DS will be 11. There are about 30 children coming to our house on Saturday afternoon. Please pray for good weather for me. I will cry if I have to have them all indoors!

I've now remembered the Scotsman's bad musical taste (as mentioned on my FB). Our night's activity also flared up his sciatica . I am not good with illness - he didn't complain much to be fair, but he won't ever be picking me up and throwing me round the bedroom...

On the other hand just before we were due to meet he sent me a text saying he had butterflies. Quite sweet really but que sera sera etc.

Off to start on the homemade pinata now, have to have something with which to entertain the screaming hordes on Saturday!

30 Are you bonkers woman?? At 11 he should be inviting a friend for tea, he should be grown out of parties in preparation for adulthood and boredom. Can he not be bribed into something less.... big?

at sciatica!! Maybe he now has it in his thumbs and that's why he hasn't text!!

I know! He wanted a big party, most of his friends are going to different seconday schools so this will be the last year they are all together. I've had about 25 here when they were 5-6 so this can't be any worse than that?

Lol at sciatica in thumbs I have clearly cheered up now cos that made me laugh.

Sponge - I know how you feel, I met a guy last weekend, in a club we spent the night together and he was lovely and seemed so interested in me and spoke about cooking me dinner and things! And was cuddly and so nice! He still hasn't called and it's now over a week ago it's a shame as I don't fancy many people and really fancied him. Silly man!!

Watch - sorry to hear you are feeling lonely , I have been single for about a year and a half and was so happy at the start and didn't feel lonely! But recently I have felt more and more lonely! Before being single this time I was in relationships for about 10 years! So it can be difficult not having anyone there to share things with! I don't really have any advice but sending hugs ((()))

It was bad enough with 5 here, 3 under two aswell, the noise was deafening.

I don't like being thrown around, I am a gentle soul me.

notsure that sounds a bit like my Chemistry man. Although he did get in touch v quickly, but then stood me up and gave a really feeble excuse for doing so . See, even when you do hear from them you can't rely on it!

I do think the universe is taking the piss though. In a shop earlier they were playing 'All you need is Love' and when I put the radio a while ago I was greeted with 'Love is All Around'

yep - thats right sponge - remember the teacher, saw himtwice, texting me valentines day things.... faile to show up for our 3rd date. nice!
But its still only been 2 days, honestly, wait a few more before you feel sad, or, text him something witty.... least you might have more clue from his reply, which is better to be sat waiting, passivly.

i dont mind the odd overnight guest, so long as its not when dd is around. and i prefer to be thrown around break sinks. Fuck, if i still had his number id be tempted to text him.... :)

and today i had the urge to text ywk. I h ave so far restrained. But i really want to. I miss him, i wouldnt feel lonely anymore if i spoke to him. But its not going to help matters, is it.so i wont.

I know what you mean it's always the way, when I break up with someone I always tend to hear lots of love songs

And to top it all off the last guy that I was seeing for in contact and now my mind is getting all involved in thinking about him again even tho I know it will never be a relationship with me and him!

Please don't text ykw. I managed three weeks of no Pm, then of course the minute he texted me, I ran around frantically tidying the house and we drank all the rum, ending up in a big comfortable cuddly sleeping heap on the sofa. It was fab, but I know we won't end up together, hanging out with him stops me finding anyone else and although it is the absolute best when he's here it makes it so much worse when he isn't.

So don't text him. Please. You're applying a sticking plaster when you really need him surgically removed... He will go again and you'll still be lonely, but it will feel worse than the lonely you feel now. :(

Watch - so sorry to hear that you're feeling sad. I know what you mean - sometimes I just long for a hug from a man, and long for that kind of closeness you have when you're part of a couple.

Sponge - I've found men seem to have very different ideas about texting to us. Twice last year I went on a date with men who seemed to like me, only to hear nothing for a week. When I contacted one, he said he'd been "too busy". That annoyed me more than anything - it takes 30 seconds to send a text! He then tried to arrange a further date, but I'd had enough by then and refused.

But I really think the guy you met might get in touch in a couple of days and think that that's fine. Of course he might not - in which case it really is his loss. If it's any comfort, I'm angry with him for not texting you already!

MLM - what's the story with you and "just friends" guy? Don't feel you have to repeat it if you don't want to.

snape - i know.
im not going to, im just going to think about it and not do it. Its just that he knows me and would lift my mood - but then id feel bad because hes with someone, then id feel guilty.. etc.. so , yeah. must not text.

The difficult bit will be when he gets back in contact with me...

oh and time - thats for the prompt about the profile - ive had a ton ( or about 15) new men contact me today..

Sponge, your bloke will probably contact you tomorrow or Wednesday if you saw him on Saturday/Sunday. There is an unwritten rule which says three days is the optimum time to resume contact. Any sooner is seen as desperation. :o

And Snape is right about ykw. Stay strong and don't contact him.

Wow - you lot chat a lot!

Can I ask how long do you normally message for before arranging a date and have yiou suggested a date or left it up to them?

Any warning signs to look out for?

I started messaging someone last night and he sounds really nice. I'm probably going to put him off completely by telling him that ex only left in Sept so that might be the end of that, but I hope not.

I was all excited awiting for a message today and one has come :) I feel all young again!!

Ninja - I tend to message for a couple of weeks, as I like to feel I know a bit about whoever I'm meeting. But I don't like to message for much longer than that, cos I've found that you can get quite close to someone through e-mail/texts/whatever, but then meet up and find there's no spark at all.

I don't see why someone should be put off that your ex left in September - that's over 6 months, which I think is fine.

Hurray! That's good news watch!

ninja you don't have to tell any person you are messaging any details about your ex or when he left. Save info like that for anyone you might get serious with. And I agree with libby re only texting for a couple of weeks before you meet, or you end up falling in love and planning the wedding with this figment of your imagination.

"or you end up falling in love and planning the wedding with this figment of your imagination."

Only to meet him and discover he's the uglier brother of his worst photo