Anyone there to help? I feel I'm drowning

[mosp]

I don't know how much I'm allowed to say about this, but if I don't express my emotions I will explode.
I recently made a new friend. Long distance. He is doomed. The friendship is doomed. I can't cope. I didn't anticipate feeling so close. :(

Buuuuut. He's the one I want. I need it to be him in particular. Now I'm thinking about this, it is BECAUSE he is a criminal, not in spite of that.

But you could write to him too UA. He'll def like you.

OK, talk it out. Why him?

Let's tackle this from a different perspective... Plus UA can take notes....

only a murderer

mosp, no

He applied for a penpal because he wanted a friend who he can be himself with

They all appeal. What have they got to lose? So has he told you how many journalists are on his side? How big is his campaign for justice? How is the ball gathering momentum for his release? If you google his name what comes up? A few articles or campaign institutions fiercely arguing his case? has he written to Obama too? If he has the courage and pens to write to Mosp I am sure he has the courage and pens to write to several of the major human rights organisations in the US.

He is wasting a LOT of fucking time writing to MOSP when his time is running out.

Do you mean, why did HW link me with him?

I thought that too AF... but left it hanging...

oh. shit. bad choice of words...

I just was explaining why he asked for a pen pal when he already writes to so many other people.

If you google, you get his website (managed by an ex girlfriend) and a lot of information about his crime.

You want a criminal? There are loads at the Parrot pub down where I live. Ten a penny.

I think you can actually marry prisoners on DR. You could do it you know. I bet you dont really have the puff. And you would need to sort out wills so that any monies go to the peas and not terry

AF thought he was a sex criminal. I just wanted to say that he is not. Neither is he a serial killer.

mosp, it doesn't matter what I think

nor does it matter what you think

he will be getting support with his case

you getting involved only harms you, and adds negligible help to him

sorry, but you are not that important to him

you are building up your importance in his life out of proportion to what it actually is, tbh

I doubt he't want to marry me anyway UA.

It could be the fact that he is a prompt and faithful writer that attracts me, and that now I know him a bit I like him a lot, and he is likely to accept me because he knows what it is like being trapped. It's not romance I want. It is for a male person to accept me.

I don't know if I am right, I'm just trying to work out:why him??

this one? he only did stabbing things. No sex. he stole a wallet too mind.

It's like cluedo. I can find some others too. They are all over the internet these DR peeps.

I am still very saddened by the sight tonight on sport relief of the little boy dying of pneumonia however. I don't give much of a toss about terrys who have nutted someone to death and who need penpals.

I would write to the US President and insist they make life on DR more tolerable for these people, instead of fucking up the heads of vulnerable people who they penpal up with.

I think you have grounds for suing Obama for the trauma his country's incarceration programme has caused you.

[mind is reeling]

I imagine that every individual who takes time to write to him is 'important' to him. He's locked up 23 hours a day.

No, not him.

Ladies, if the tone taken with mosp is too predatory, she will retreat.

She needs to tell us why HIM specifically, we need to understand more to help her better.

If you don't care, you shouldn't write to him :(

we are listening

and adding our thoughts

mospie knows how this thing works

Hi,

Fan knows about the thread - I emailed her a link. I think, for what it's worth, that you are getting sucked in so much, precisely because you are vulnerable.

Maybe you feel a subconscious affinity because you are imposing a sort of emotional DR on yourself, as well as a desire to help someone in a difficult position, which is, in itself, a noble thing.

I think, along with AF, it's just not for you - or at least not at the moment. That's why it's so draining.

Do take care, and try to distance yourself a little. If not for your own good, for the sake of the peas.

Hissy. Here are the reasons I can think of (and I'm being brutally honest here, so please don't hate me):

1. I know him. I know what he looks like. I know a lot of his family circs. I feel a connection

1. I like his writing style and hand-writing

1. I like that he always writes quickly (same day he gets mine) and he writes pages and pages. And it is all friendly and not in anyway inappropriate.

1. I like that we are in agreement on certain things. You might be shocked to hear that he is a Christian (no, he didn't find God in prison. He was already a Christian in a very bad place when he murdered)

I'll try to think of more

I wouldn't hate you. I'd not be here for a start now would i?

what is the connection that you feel for him and no-one else?

Maybe the connection is that he also went through a bad time and made devastating choices. So we understand each other. Of course I knew nothing about this until we were paired up. For all I knew I could have been given a barely literate child abuser. As I said, I went into this with nothing but selfless intentions. I had no idea that I would be so upset about the plight of a person I never met. I mean, I was upset about the DP in itself, but I didn't expect to ever feel more than just a far-away pen pal.

Everything you say referring to yourself mosp is SOO negative. you use words like hate, not deserving of help, he'd not want to marry me...

My love you are not in a place to help others. Please see that. You so desperately need love and help yourself.

With the best intentions in the world let's look at your reasons:

1. You 'know' him.

you know what he tells you. You have little way of backing that up. You don't actually know him and neither will you ever know him. he can't judge you as he's on DR convicted of the most serious crime there is. That of killing another person. Is that it? His crime is worse than whatever crime it is that YOU think YOU have perpetrated?

1. Handwriting and Style.

OK, great penmanship is to be admired, but you know this is a weak point don't you?

1. He writes quickly.

He's locked up 23 hours a day. Not like he's going to miss the postman now is it?

1. Christianity

I'm not shocked about that. It's clearly irrelevant.

Not one of these reasons is startling enough to suggest that YOU are providing him with an irreplaceable source of support. He writes to others, you know this, so it would be OK if you stepped back a little. Especially if he thinks anything of you at all.