Firstly, they do change when you have kids. Mine looks a lot different now, and to be honest I preferred it aesthetically before childbirth vs after. Still, I've learned to love it in its new incarnation 
Also, have you heard of the Great Wall of Vagina? This bloke took loads of casts of different women's vaginas, to help them see how much variation was normal in a hope it would lead to greater acceptance. You can buy a book of photographs of the casts, which I have seen, and let me tell you, there is no such thing as an ugly one. There are all wildly, varying and fascinatingly different. That's the beauty of the fanjo!
So long as you keep things clean and reasonably trim down there, I don't see how he can mind. My guess is that he's just never going to be very enthusiastic about giving oral, perhaps he's a bit afraid of it - and he was probably like that with previous partners too. It's not personal! He just doesn't sound much cop in the bedroom. Perhaps he's worried he's no good and doesn't want to try. Perhaps he's squeamish about a womans natural taste - do you go down on him?
For Gods sake don't go and order yourself a porn start fanny from some cosmetic surgeon, I'm sure it's fine as it it. I think it's your man with the issue, not you.