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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So he kissed a girl....

448 replies

MomentarilyLost · 16/02/2012 16:55

I started a thread about discovering my husband sending dirty emails to women and then going on to discover he had signed up to dating sites, singles chat rooms and had a secret facebook account.

All this has been going on during office hours.

So through means I am not proud of I have had the confirmation he has been sleeping with someone for two years. Another girl has told me they met and kissed.

I feel sick.

I feel stupid I didnt see this coming.

and do you know what..? the bastard still denies it.

I dont know how I will get through these coming days?

My poor children, I can barely talk at the minute

Any advice on how to pull myself together would be greatly received

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MomentarilyLost · 14/05/2012 23:16

Andrew Lincoln, mmm!

Was in this life.

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MomentarilyLost · 14/05/2012 23:18

Now he is a handy fella to have around

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AnyFucker · 14/05/2012 23:46

that's the geezer !

I am now watching the film that is on after the zombie thing.

Bloody hell, it's all happening tonight...

MomentarilyLost · 14/05/2012 23:57

Ooh what is it!? Just finishing with the zombies. At least this stuff is make believe. Been living with and still dealing with something much scarier.

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AnyFucker · 15/05/2012 00:00

I dunno what it is (some film called quarantime...maybe about rabies?). It's gruesome though, you would like it Grin

people are foaming at the mooth and getting their heads blown off in horrible ways. Imagine that twunt doing the same Wink

AnyFucker · 15/05/2012 00:01

foaming at the mooth ?

it's erm, set in Scotland Grin

MomentarilyLost · 15/05/2012 00:11
Grin

Just had a quick fag Hmm and a quick check for the undead. All quiet.

I think its safe to go to bed.

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AnyFucker · 15/05/2012 00:15
Grin

I think I should go to bed too, or I will look like The Undead in the morning. Or rabid. Not sure which is worse.

MomentarilyLost · 18/05/2012 20:55

I haven't cried for days, had a good week. Seen friends I haven't seen in ages which was really great.

But now I am crying. Ex has just text to say how sorry he is, how he had always loved me and had never stopped. How he hates what he has done to our family and to me.

Could he not have considered any of this before. Before he decided to go looking for a fuck. Before he decided to treat me like crap after I said I had had enough.

I haven't text back.

I feels so sad again.

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MomentarilyLost · 18/05/2012 22:20

And now he wants to know if I can forgive him :(

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MomentarilyLost · 18/05/2012 23:05

Why? Why text me that?

I can do the hostility,I have got used to that.

But this is too much.

Why when its all to late. Why when he know how much I felt for him did he tell me this.I had been doing so well.

And now all I can do is cry. Fuck off

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Aussiebean · 19/05/2012 02:38

I am sorry ML. That is a horrible thing he has done.

I am not experienced in this so can't give good advice. Just the knowledge that someone is thinking if you.

If I had to guess, I would say he is texting this because you aren't crying over him any more, before when you were desperate, he had all the power. Now you have taken that power back he takes it up a notch, in the hope he gets that power back.

I am a little old school and think a text is NOT the way to get someone to forgive you. It should be RL actions and gestures, not a 20sec text. You love is worth way more then 20sec

Preggersntired · 19/05/2012 07:35

ML - I've just read your whole thread - you have come so far. I cannot believe all the things you've been through. As if the OW stuff wasn't enough, he has treated you appallingly. So glad you have had done great support on this thread. I think you've done amazingly well to get rid of him.

I can see why you're upset. He's just twisting the knife now he realises you're not going to roll over & take any more crap. Interesting to reconcile the car incident, (bloody awful) with the contrite sounding texts!

Are you on the waiting list for any counselling via the GP? Do Women's Aid offer any counselling does anyone know? Are you able to offload to anyone in RL - sister, parents, a friend?

Please know that life will get better for you and your DC. Just hang onto that. You should feel proud of yourself for getting him out of your house I can see a little of what that took for you. I hope you have something nice planned with the DC this weekend that might take your mind off him - taking them to the pool, going for a tramp in the woods...

Sending lots of support and thinking of you x

AbigailAdams · 19/05/2012 08:34

Hi ML just read your thread.

Wow this man is a piece of work! What a horrible time you have had.

Absolutely do not reply to his whiny texts, but do keep them. I would keep all his texts and keep a diary of all his other his histrionics, nastiness, cruelties and assaults (because the car incident was assault - I would still consider logging this with the police so there is a record of it). Someone up thread said not to tell him of any of your plans which is wise advice. In fact no conversations at all about anything other than children or divorce (when you get round to thinking about that). The diary of his fuckwittedness will be useful then too. Totally detach for the foreseeable future. You may get to a point where you can behave normally (but tbh he is sounding more and more narcissistic so that might never be a reality).

Just keep remembering it is his behaviour that has brought you to this point. No matter what he might tell you. MN is very good at validating your feelings and your reality so if posting helps keep doing it.

Finally I don't think anyone has recommended Lundy Bancroft - Why does he do that? I think you may recognise your ex and how his previous behaviour has got you to this point.

Sending you a big hug too (as everyone needs a hug).

fiventhree · 19/05/2012 08:41

Ml, I dont doubt that he is contrite and sorry, I doubt it is a calculated act. And given his current mental health.

However, it isnt good enough, is it?

After what he has put you through, I still dont think he gets it. He just doesnt want the work it would take to srt this out properly.

Much easier for him to 1. lie, 2. move on to self pity and drama, not least to distract you, 3. tantrums and car stuff in front of the kids (ie angry now, that he isnt getting his own way, and then 4. abject apologies.

Thos sorts of responses are all about how he is dealing with his own feelings and discomfort^. Nothing there about you, really, at all, is there?

I dont think it is mature of him to expect forgiveness now, and the hard work later. Also, I expect the next line would be 'oh, there is no point in working on myself unless you take me back, etc'.

It is a form of selfishness. And also, it is an act of immaturity.

He needs to sort himself out because he wants to and sees the need, and to explain to himself the whole truth, all of it, and why he did this, and behaved in this way. Isnt that what taking responsibility is about, starting with taking responsibility for yourself?

He has a great many problems to fix, and he needs to get cracking on them, one at a time. And then come to offer you his apology, if you want to hear it by then.

As Aussiebean has said, action not words. There are no shortcuts for him out of this mess.

MomentarilyLost · 19/05/2012 09:37

I was coming into the weekend fairly positive. This has derailed me a little and taken the glow off my progress.I could do the hostility. It was helping me to detach.

Just why oh why start with that I love yous and always has?! Why is it so hard to hear.

I haven't sorted any counselling. I had felt I was do ok working through this on my own. Then having an off load every now and then.

He was having a go earlier in the week saying I only wanted me to have the children so I could go and meet a guy. I explain that they need to see him as did he. He then thanked me for being so understanding after everything. It's not about him or me it about what's best for the dc.Maybe that has something to do with the I love yous can you forgive me. Maybe he is worried someone will actually pay me some attention.

The boys are going to stay the night with him. And my dd is stay home with me. He is coming to collect them soon I will have to see him :(

Thank you for the replies x

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Preggersntired · 19/05/2012 10:47

How was it ML? Hope you're ok - enjoy the girls time with your dd.

MomentarilyLost · 21/05/2012 11:28

The tension seems to be easing between me and ex.

Be nice if it lasts and we can show a united front for the dc.

Had a bit of a scare last night,I heard noises outside the house before bed and I was convinced someone was trying to break in. I had the phone at the ready to call 999. Made a bit of noise to discover it was a fox with her cubs. Phew!

Heart was in my mouth. Managed to get through it without panicking to much.

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MomentarilyLost · 21/05/2012 18:14

Scrap that stbxh getting on my wick already. He is seeing the dc tonight. I booked in to go to the dentist. Just got back. Feeling a bit sorry for myself because boy it wasn't fun.he just phoned ranting about me not calling when I got back (i had just got though the door for fucks sake) and I need to sort out feeding the dc. He is suppose to be spending time with them not babysitting them for me. Fuck the fuck off.

Sorry just having a rant.

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fiventhree · 21/05/2012 18:36

Ah yes...the general selfishness. All goes together, doesnt it? Amazing what a little time does to the perspective!

Suggest he sees them else where and feeds them, too!

MomentarilyLost · 21/05/2012 18:48

Oh so selfish. He had taken them out. I won't have him here.

He was grinning when he left in the car. I swear it was because he knew I was in pain.

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Preggersntired · 24/05/2012 17:23

How are you doing ML?

MadAboutHotChoc · 24/05/2012 20:10

When you see him, you need to come across as breezy which would mean faking it - the bastard does not need to see you upset or sad.

Hope you are doing ok now?

MomentarilyLost · 24/05/2012 22:41

Hey guys thank you for checking in on me.

Had a good couple of days. Met up with friends last night for a drink. Which was lovely.

Ex back being a total twat. He started sending odd text when he knew I was due out, asking what time I was getting to the pub because he wanted to know if he should leave (he knew what which pub I was going to). Seems to love trying to mess with my head. I walked into the pub and order a drink, while I waited for my friends to arrive. Surprises surprises he was no where to be seen.

Getting good at doing bright and breezy. That's where I'm at! Always happy to see the back of him! I have had people saying how much better I seem within myself and how much brighter I look. Which is nice Blush

Kids have been generally good. Although they have really tested my today. But I felt I was so much more capable to deal with them.

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MomentarilyLost · 24/05/2012 22:58

Something that is weirding me out is that he has put his wedding ring back on!?

Noticed it and asked him about it, he said we are still married.

Am I right in feeling that is odd?

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