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Original poster

To have texted DPs friend pretending to be him?

907 replies

JamRagRolyPoly · 11/02/2012 13:48

DP got in at 5am last night, saw a text on his phone (he was there when I was looking for texts from me) from his friend saying 'strip club round the cormer' Hmm.

I outright asked him, did you go? He said no. He knows I'm very much against them. Now I'm wondering if he can lie to my face.

While he's in the shower I texted his friend pretending to be DP saying 'great night last night, how was the strip club' so his friend could potentially text back saying er you were there mate remember?

Aibu to want to know if my DP is capable of lying to my face? This troubles me more than the strip club, because then it's like, what else?

(I know tis sounds very childish btw)

OP posts:
SardineQueen · 12/02/2012 18:51

The high street here doesn't have a strip club.
Nor any of the ones I can think of nearby.

Most people are against them, I am sure. Think about the population. Lots and lots of women. Around half, in fact. Many not keen. People over about 40. Mostly not keen (generational thing). People with young / school age children. Often not keen. People who hold certain religious views. Not keen at all. And so on.

The idea that they are normal, fine and accepted is desperately peddled by people who want them to be normal, fine and accepted so they don't have any worried about using them.

Incidentally the licence system for strip clubs has been changed so that they are no longer under the "coffee house" umbrella and licences are harder to get. That doesn't sound like growing acceptance to me.

StrawberrytallCAKE · 12/02/2012 18:52

Strip clubs are NOT socially acceptable, you can see this from the amount of problems a strip club has in obtaining a license and the uproar from locals when people apply for one in their town. They are legal but it is the minority of society that frequent strip clubs therefore imo they are widely recognised as acceptable in society.

You think that your husbands are ok going to strip clubs and trust them but I used to work in a strip club (not as a stripper) and I saw the men lusting after these women and lust is surely cheating? The ones who would give out their number, tell women that they were better than working in a place like this, offer them more money for more services were most of the men in the place. It is a very well known 'reputable' strip club I am talking about too. Sorry this probably isn't helping you op.

After your description of your dh and the fact that you don't have children in your position I would absolutely with out a doubt show him the door. Drugs, lying, strip clubs...you wouldn't be able to tell your children their Dad was respectable...

SigmundFraud · 12/02/2012 18:52

'notfluffy and sigmund - do you know what cognitive dissonance is? You're both being absolutely textbook in the way you're responding to this thread. You may not realise it, but you also have an agenda.'

Want to tell me what my agenda is? Actually I know what my agenda is, I can't speak for Fluffy of course, she will tell you what hers is, if she has one.

Firstly, I couldn't give a fuck what cognitive dissonance is.

I started posting on this thread with no agenda. Now, I have. I've mentioned feminism a fair bit. I don't have a problem with certain aspects of it or certain feminists.

But I really object to feminists using the relationships section as a platform for their feminist views, they do it ALL the time. Charbon is a perfect example. If you want to discuss the seedy underbelly of the sex industry then start a fucking thread about it yourself, like the one in Chat right now. Or post it in on the feminist boards.

SardineQueen · 12/02/2012 18:52

When people start swearing at each other it usually indicates a certain amount of emotion. I have noticed this on MN. It possibly holds true in other areas of life as well.

notfluffyatall · 12/02/2012 18:56

I didn't swear AT anyone. I just swore. I'm a grown up, I'm allowed to. Jeeez, so sensitive.

AnyFucker · 12/02/2012 18:56

I know of the the existence and geography of several sex trade establishments

if you think simply knowing they are there makes their existence acceptable you are wrong

StrawberrytallCAKE · 12/02/2012 18:57

'They are legal but it is the minority of society that frequent strip clubs therefore imo they are widely recognised as acceptable in society.'

sorry - should say widely recognised as unacceptable in society.

Damn my refusal to use preview.

SigmundFraud · 12/02/2012 18:58

'After your description of your dh and the fact that you don't have children in your position I would absolutely with out a doubt show him the door. Drugs, lying, strip clubs...you wouldn't be able to tell your children their Dad was respectable...'

Shock Shock Shock. Wow.

AnyFucker · 12/02/2012 18:58

that's really funny, sigmund, since you have posted on the FWR board in attempt to derail

which was an epic fail, btw Smile

StrawberrytallCAKE · 12/02/2012 19:00

Sigmund, tell me why? It is honestly just my opinion and if my daughter couldn't respect her father I would be very upset, maybe it's because of the way my parents brought me up. I'm not saying it's the right way I'm just saying that is my opinion.

SigmundFraud · 12/02/2012 19:02

Glad I amused you AnyFucker Wink

AnyFucker · 12/02/2012 19:03

small pleasures sigmund

Charbon · 12/02/2012 19:05

The litmus test is which posts were helpful to the OP. That's the primary objective of this board, to help the OP.

Irritating misogynists who suggest that drug-taking, strip-joint attending city-workers are 'real men' is just.........a lovely bonus Grin.

flippinada · 12/02/2012 19:08

"I started posting on this thread with no agenda. Now, I have. I've mentioned feminism a fair bit. I don't have a problem with certain aspects of it or certain feminists."

I'm fairly sure feminists everywhere are reeling with complete apathy at this deeply significant statement.

SigmundFraud · 12/02/2012 19:09

Ah the misogynists quote...was waiting for that one. So far so predictable.

flippinada · 12/02/2012 19:09

"The litmus test is which posts were helpful to the OP. That's the primary objective of this board, to help the OP. "

Absolutely.

SigmundFraud · 12/02/2012 19:11

I'm fairly sure feminists everywhere are reeling with complete apathy at this deeply significant statement

I'm sure they're not. I'm sure they're quibbling over whether 'adult female' is a deeply offensive term. Endlessly.

Sparks1 · 12/02/2012 19:14

But these establishments are granted a licence by democratically elected representatives of the community. If they were not socially accepted ( Or rather let's say tolerated) these people would be voted out.

By all means argue the case against these establishments but don't claim to have the majority backing of the populace against them. You don't. If you did they simply wouldn't exist.

AnyFucker · 12/02/2012 19:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

SigmundFraud · 12/02/2012 19:19

'but I do wonder why you are having a good ole complain about them nasty feminists on this thread'

Because nobody notices them, or that the discussion has moved away from to OP and onto their own agenda.

I can cope with looking like a tit from time to time. We all do sometimes, even you.

JaneMare · 12/02/2012 19:21

But these establishments are granted a licence by democratically elected representatives of the community. If they were not socially accepted ( Or rather let's say tolerated) these people would be voted out.

Grin

that is quite naive of you to believe that, Sparks1

even democratically elected representatives have their own agenda when passing licences etc. especially ones who have their DPs believing that strip clubs are viable entertainment venues

flippinada · 12/02/2012 19:24

Those awful feminists, with their feminist ideas and feminist opinions about feminism. And other feminist things.

"By all means argue the case against these establishments but don't claim to have the majority backing of the populace against them. You don't. If you did they simply wouldn't exist."

On this point, can anyone remind me if we have a majority government in this country. I guess we must, because otherwise they simply wouldn't be in power. Perhaps someone could enlighten me?

PattiMayor · 12/02/2012 19:24

Everyone has an agenda Sigmund. Most of us are smart enough to realise that fact.

BayPolar · 12/02/2012 19:28

Have just caught up with this thread.
He's not being sorry enough.
He also broke your trust before.
Once before, if that is true.
You are young.
I wouldn't have children with this person.
He's already shown that he's one of the many fools out there who thinks it's okay to go and ogle another woman, even though he says he's in love with you and wants a child with you.
In my eyes, he'll always be pathetic for this side to him.
You think he doesn't look at porn or won't look at porn in the future?
Uh.
Ick.
Try and find yourself a man who doesn't need to accessorise his manhood with porn or random naked women.

AnyFucker · 12/02/2012 19:30

or smart enough to stop denying it in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary Smile

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