''I just WISH I could find someone worthy of a proper relationship instead of a long stream of fuckwits" Dating chat #6

[lubeybooby]

here we go... all dating related chat HERE!

:o

Good for you Freakoid re getting back on track. Having a spending spree doesn't do any harm if you can manage to pull it back. I quite enjoy being frugal, sticking to a budget and even trying to beat it! I'm on a mission to lose weight so that I can get back into all my old clothes, which will feel like new clothes seeing as I haven't been able to get into them for almost 2 years So, I'm determined not to buy anything new for myself next year. There are only so many pairs of jeans and so many tops a person can have, besides, I tend to wear my favourites over and over again so don't need all of the clothes I already have!

Do you think you are contacting him because you really like him swallowed or because you are bored? . I find I am more likely to initiate contact with someone I wouldn't normally if I'm bored. I'm also with Freakoid on the attention seeking thing, when I'm bored I like the attention but I can't say I really want to date. I'm a dud dater.

It's only been 3 months for me, before that 6 months, before that one it had been over a year... I just don't want to shag just anyone though, you're all talking about lowering standards but I think I need to raise mine Not that I'll go with just anyone but a few times there has been someone interested in me and I haven't fancied them until I find out they fancy me and I wonder if there is a desperate side of me that surfaces at such moments

I'm quite liking the 'yes, you can look but you can't have me' phase I'm in at the moment . I know I keep saying it but I do love being single.

i cannot bear the 'fix me emotionally' types. I listen well, I offer great advice (that no-one ever takes!) I really can't be bothered 'fixing' men people men who aren't really into me as a romantic interest, so they can stroll off and make some other woman gloriously happy! My altruism has worn thin! I can name several instances of unofficial counselling, being kind, listening, advising where the individual in question couldn't give a flying fuck when I've been feeling low and wanted to talk. bloody energy vampires, I agree it's hardly a swept-off-your-feet first date, is it?!

right, I'm going to revise my profile i think - when i have time - amidst all my ebaying. :)

wedge-wellies for the win!

I'm with you on that Snape, I'm done with men who need fixing, being a fixer is what got me involved with The Ex, he had lot's that needed fixing and I stupidly thought I was the woman who could do it. Ha! Being a fixer isn't healthy though, I can see that now so I am very proud that I no longer feel that way, it's testament to how far I have come and how much I have changed as a person.

I can't wait for my Amazon voucher to come through now so I can order my wedge wellies. I'm not going to bother waiting for snow to wear them either!

Will you be joining the festivalers now Time seen as yuo'll have your wellies soon

You never know Zany, I might just do that. .

I do love my wellies but these are glamorous wellies!

Ahh but I go glamping not camping

That sounds more my style Zany

I seem to end up listening a lot too.
I have realised I care too much about people who are not worthy of it. People talk to me and I'll remember little things about what they're doing or about their kids etc and care about how they are getting on, even when it's over between us but dont get the same back. Eg the last bloke I was seeing (who out of the blue turned up for coffee on mon hving not spoken to me for months then tried to get me to shag him again ), well I'd remembered he had been to see his dds in scotland and had been to court to finalise his divorce and the custody agreement, I remembered his dds ages and names, an issue one of them had had when we were together so I was asking him about all of that...he couldn't even remember the gender of my dc let alone any other details, he couldn't remember anything I'd told him about my life. It was just really weird because I was sat there thinking "but we've had this conversation before..." And it did make me realise I invest a lot more emotionally than many other people do, I like caring though, and not sure I'd want that to change but it does mean I get hurt because I kind of assume that people will care about me back.

I might not actually meet anyone through this dating experience but at least it's voyage of self discovery

You can say that again Freakoid, I've learned a hell of a lot about myself since joining this thread!

I do think as well that dating makes you realise what are deal breakers and what isn't. My ideal was someone over 6 ft but in reality if you find someone who ticks all the other box's then height isn't really an issue but I'll still wear my high heals

Don't feel you should change Freakoid as I am sure your caring nature will be one of the many things that will attract the right person to you. I am very trustful and open and although this has ended up with me being hurt in the past as I put my trust in the wrong person I don't want to end up not trusting anyone so will remain trusting and open. I'm not letting a mere bloke remove one of my good points from me

time, as Billy Connolly sang, If it was not for your wellies where would you be? You'd be in the hospital or infirmary. You could have a dose of the flu or even pleurisy if you didna' have your feet in your wellies! Wellies they are wonderful! Wellies they are swell. They keep out the water and they keep in the smell!

And I think there's more... wife #2 was a Scot and she had a heap of his records and translated them into English for me.

Been thinking about my dating history and wondering if there is any pattern. Excuse me while I attempt to find one or otherwise:

1993 first boyfriend, 3 months

1994 single all the way through apart from v short relationships

1995 Got with my daughters dad, 3 years

1998 Single for 5 months, Dated like a looney, then got with now ex husband, but it was an open and also LD relationship at first

2001 Finally gave in, co-habiting

2002 to Oct 2007 married

Oct 2007 separated, not interested in any relationship at all. Dated. Had a few FWB

2008 LIVED IT UP! Dated like mad but nothing serious

2009 Still dating. Wanted a relationship, ended up with a short lived one.

2010 in a relationship

2011 -

Jan to May - still in the same relationship from 2010.

May - big bad break up.

May to October - Wanted a relationship again ASAP. Indulged in very short lived one

October to present - DO NOT want a relationship. Have FWB again.

2012 TBC

:o

Hmmm. No pattern there really. Oh well, at least it doesn't look too bad written down like that, despite all the dating site idiots and let downs and wankbag and all that I've had good times being single and a good few that lasted reasonably well.

Oh dear, has anyone else looked at a profile pic, thought aw, that's nice he must be supporting Movember.

And then realised that he always looks like that

just quickly, because im super busy...

time - win some, dont buy them. If you on my fb, i think its called the wellyshop or something, follow my posts on fb... like the page and then post of the wall as to why you should win some. they are doing a dec competation for wellies, made by wedge wellie, but called 'splash' lots of funky desgins. save your money!!

sounds familiar freakoid.

this is all giving me some things to mull on.

also the blonde one i was meant to have a date with on sat has just text me...

last heard from him friday. should i go?
bearing in mind he is blonde and i cant be arsed? and he cant be that bothered seeing as its been 5 days since ive last heard from him.
and i really need to tidy out my study sat and not be in costas ( where i might get seen by my mother and step dad who i know are in town xmas shopping that day)

Thank you watch!!! Will go and have a look!

As for date on Saturday, you sound as though you would like an excuse not to go so don't. Simples!

We are strong, independent, happily single women. We can do what we like! Just because we can!

Watch - you don't really want to go i think. :)

I've messaged two men on OKC. enough of this wilting wallflower waiting for them blah blah.

I can never be arsed when it comes to dates unless I'm meeting someone for sex and I know it's going to be worth my while. The rest of the time I'm pessimistic and have to force myself to go.
My point is that if I just followed my natural inclinations and stayed in my comfort zone I'd never get any action at all

I have a date tomorrow and feel very eyore-ish about the prospect

I have another date booked up for Saturday, I am enjoying the dating experience I must be honest, been such a long time since I have felt like a teenager again. Just got to get over the body issues and have decided I will go with the flow and stop stressing about it. Sex may not be on the cards and I dont want to force the issue. Will change the sheets and sort out bikini line just in case!
Funny though since I have been dating again I have had more interest in me than usual maybe I seem less desparate :).

may sound like a dumb question prettypurple but what do you enjoy about it?
I find making conversation with people I've met on a casual dating site about as enjoyable as having teeth pulled
Even when I do fancy them I cant say I especially enjoy chatting to them..must be something wrong with me, durr..I dunno