The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Here's To STAYING On A Sober Holiday!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

I have an abusive and volatile relationship with alcohol.

This is the Brave Babes Bus, it's filled with sober, drinking and somewhere in between Babes who are all here for the journey ahead, whatever that may entail.

EVERYONE is welcome on this Bus. No-one will judge what you are going through, what you drink, what you don't or what you do.

Come take a seat.

Take a peek at the journeys so far (including the thread by JWN that started this whole journey off) HERE

Oh, and maybe chant the mantra "I don't want to embarass you, my oldest friend, by getting blind drunk at your birthday party...". Of course this doesn't work if the birthday girl is doing exactly that.

oops sorry B&B [embarrassed] don't know what made me think you weren't!

crap -

There is was thinking that dementedma had some special gender divining skills I was lacking!

Yy to the sudden blackouts at the end of the night, almost as if being drunk accelerates my drinking, instead of slowing it down like other people.

Start of a long weekend here, wish me luck! No alcohol in the house, so tonight will be ok. And have booked a room where I will have to share a bed with dd, so that normally stops me having a drink. Annoyingly have found out that wine is free flow with dinner at our hotel, so will ask them to take my wine glass away when we sit down. That usually helps me.

Either that or eat room service instead!

Afternoon Ladies .... to jump into the discussion, I used to try to have two drinks on the go - the alcoholic one and a glass of water. I guess it works the same as alternating but you feel you miss out less. Whatever happens it slows your drinking down if you make sure you have a glass of water for every glass of wine or whatever.

Sorry I've not been around - working very hard!! Drank on the weekend but am in the swing of not drinking during the week now which is working well. If I only acheive that I will be happy.

Got my referral through from mental health team ... which feels a bit more 'official' than bereavement counselling. Does that sound silly? Not sure what to think, I have a triage assessment next week. Feeling slightly better this week, we have our hospital appointment to talk about all things genetic next month. Main thing is I am tired, DD is testing me 24/7 at the moment! I also have horrible nightmares about death. Ugh.

Anyhooo, today I will not be drinking.

Oh God, YY to the sudden blackouts. I can be fine - well, pissed but lucid - and then absolutely 'whoosh'. It's like someones flicked a switch and I swear, I've actually felt the moment happen when I go from drunk to blackout but it's too late by that point....

And re the alternating booze with soft drinks - it doesn't seem to work for me as I tend to drunkenly think 'I can get on it now, as I was good earlier. And I always seem to be more drunk than others - even though we drink the same amount. Anyone else feel that? I mean I know there's a tendency for boozers to see what they want in relation to drinking but I know some of my girlfriends match me glass for glass. Yet they're not blacking out or falling over.

I realise I sound self pitying and I apologise for that. But in a way I do feel sad - sad that I'm can't drink like other people and probably need to say goodbye to that part of my life. But the though of never having a cold beer on the beach again does my head in. And round and round the internal debate goes....

Again, thank you all for reading and input so far.

Hi Everyone, have been doing ok until Tuesday night when me and hubby realised we had the night to ourselves. Went out for a meal and had far too much to drink.

Fell out of bed when we got home and woke up bruised down one side, extremely hungover. Luckily I am off work at the moment so I could lie on the sofa all day.

Really pissed off now and to make things worse I have WW tonight and i don't think I've lost any weight and its my first week!!

BatteredandBoozed I get blackouts when drunk too, they are very scary, I hate it when I can't remember what I was doing and my husband winds me up and makes stuff up to embarrass me.

Anyway I will not be drinking today

B&B is it possible that with going to the gym regularly you are fitter than your friends? I find that the fitter I am, the quicker I get drunk. It may explain why you get drunk faster.

I Know what you mean BandB. I have often looked at others enviously who are able to be happy to have just 2 drinks or will quite willingly drive on a night out and have either a couple of shandies or soft drinks. Am hoping that the more I cut down the easier it will be.

Well, none of my regular drinking buddies go to the gym or do any exercise, so I guess I am fitter. Hadn't occured to me that that might be a factor. You would think the fitter you were, the higher your tolerance!

Hello Babes

I'm sending this from a VERY wet and windy Wales.

B&B - I am currently sporting a lump on my forehead, large black bruises to my legs, tongue and left shoulder, oh and a graze on my head that I found yesterday.

I got super pissed, fell asleep on the loo, fell off and smashed my head on the bath and then the stone floor. Blacked out.

Clever eh?

Your not alone, no siree! Most of the Babes have been there, done that, worn the t-shirt, puked on it, written the book, read it, then ignored it.

Your first post was the first and most important step to acknowledging that you don't like what happens to you when you get shit faced. Well done and welcome lovely .

Saf - loving all of your posts right now, really making sense to me too. Just so true.

Well, we've been to the spa and pool at a very posh holiday complex down the road. I managed to have a good 45 mins to myself in the spa and feel awesome for it. I also managed to swim a few lengths which is a huge achievement for me as the pain usually cripples me.

It was Nemo's very first time swimming. He absolutely loved it. He went into the big pool too, his little arms just about visible out of his armbands.

He did choke on some water at first and vomited into the pool but they were so nice about it, just scoped it up, checked we were all okay and left us to it. The staff were fantastic. So kind. Everyone adored him and wanted to clap each time he splashed DH. It was another bit or 'normal' that we gave to our beautiful little boy.

Ma - I'm so sorry that your twat of a DH is still at it. I really feel for you and only hope that one day, you'll be free. How did DD1 get on?

Hello everyone else

Where's IsinDe? Not seen her for a while, have I missed a post from her?

Hey Mouse, don't think you missed a post from Isinde, haven't seen her around for a while. Like you I am loving SAFs posts.

B&B first thing is not to think too hard or too far into the future. It's very easy for the thought of bever having an ice cold glass of whatever, to be just the excuse you wanted to have one today. When that day comes, think about it then, don't get stressed thinking about it now.

For going out I suggest having something to eat before you go, and a big, big drink of water (don't start out hungry or tired). For me what works best is having the first 2 drinks as soft drinks, always. Plan what you are going to have (so you don't end up dithering at the bar, saying 'oh go on, I'll just have a wine, err, yes a large one'), and plan a reason why you're having it. e.g. I'm going to start with an orange juice and soda, I've been rushing around all day and I'm really hot and thirsty.... Ditto for your second drink 'Oh that was really refreshing, I'l have another'. By that stage you a full 2 drinks behind everyone else, and full of liquid so you're not as tempted just to neck the whole glass of wine. If you do have wine as your third drink, you my find your friends are starting to get a bit uninhibited and irritating, they'll be urging you to hurry up, so they can get the next round in. Meanwhile you'll be full of liquid and wondering what all the fuss is about.

Referring to an earlier post by SAF in response to B&B where SAF makes the comment that working full-time and drinking at the weekend leaves a lot of things not getting done (inc sleep), and advises planning the weekend doing things you wouldn't normally do.
That really struck a cord with me, I have been working full-time for the last 6 years and drinking at the weekend (not so much of late) and there are lots of things well overdue to be tackled. Normally I let the weekend just happen, but this weekend I am going to see if I can plan ahead and not waste it with a hangover.
Hope that all makes sense (trying to type quickly as I am at work)

Thank you Mouse, hope your injuries heal soon. I'm getting a reminder of my night out everytime I bend my leg. Or flex my toes of the other leg. Or lean on my shoulder.

Am thinking I might pull the 'antibiotics' line at Saturdays party - seems easier than bearing my soul.

Does / did anyone else feel terror at the thought of not sharing a decent cold white in a mates back garden ever again and if so, how do you cope with it - especially if drinking forms the background for so many friendships? I have a few, maybe 4 friends, who I know would understand and support me (and they're part of drinking circle) but others not so much. And those that understood - well, our friendships would change because watching others get pissed is boring, right?

actually, on a quick google, having a lower percentage of body fat ought to make you less likely to get drunk (higher proportion of water in your body as more water in muscle than fat, apparently). but fitness likely to result in lower weight overall / more potential for dehydration. So: plenty of water to be imbibed at all times....

PS "Does / did anyone else feel terror at the thought of not sharing a decent cold white in a mates back garden ever again ". Yes, and part of the reason I am not aiming to give up completely at this point. But I'd like to be able to enjoy the cold white and then get off the lift after a couple of floors (see posts below....)

So Legal, big or slim, healthy or unhealthy, the trick is to drink water in abundance

Indeed: "Drink and don't drink"; or, to put it another way "don't drink, drink"

On the bright side - at least you didn't really, really enjoy it. Cos that would have been a disaster.

Currently hosting playdate from hell. Why do different combinations of children yield different results? Guest keeps coming to whine every two minutes about something or other. He complained about my cooking last time he was here, so will be a fun dinnertime.

Unrelated -did I mention I was turning 40 on Saturday?

thursday evening amusement - check out this great range of cordials from Belvoir Fruit Farms

link

And there's some great competitions too. And I do like the idea of "lovely o'clock"