I started dating a man around 7 weeks ago (internet dating). We hit it off instantly - our first proper date lasted 26 hours and we've been seeing each other twice a week ever since. He is great in many ways and we do get on really well, in general - but he has these concerns about me and seems to be banging on about them in an attempt to work out if I'm a good catch or not. We've had really serious conversations about the future and it hasn't felt particularly premature, although the "L" word has not been broached.
- I have done coke in the past, and a little bit recently. He hates it and is concerned that I am not a stable person and under stress, will go on a bender. This used to be true of me but not any more. I've told him this but he's not convinced (nowadays I'm the most likely seen heading off to bed as soon as possible).
2 I am nearly 40 but don't have a property or any decent savings (to be fair, I started my career at 27 and have moved country around 9 years ago, and started from virtually nothing, and I am a little bit rubbish with money - but I have not intention of asking anyone else to bail me out. I have my own plans for a business/career development etc). I earn about a grand more than him.
He is concerned that I am going to want to take his money from him (he's worked hard and has his own lovely house all paid off) and has been questioning me quite intently. He made it clear that he thinks I'm irresponsible for not having sorted my money out. I have told him that I don't care about his money but he says he's seen it too many times with his friends being divorced and losing their personal savings etc. He's been quite harsh with me about this.
He's made it pretty clear that he wants kids (neither of us have any), and he doesn't want to waste a year trying to work out if it's going to work.
Should I bail and leave him or does he have a point? The issue is that I'm starting to think he's not going to be a very nice person over the long term, because he sees everything in black and white. He can be very kind (he cares for his elderly mother) but he can also be quite bitter and cynical about people.
But I also tend to run from relationships out of fear sometimes.
What do you make of this?