The Brave Babes Battle Bus - We're All Going On A Sober Holiday!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Brave Babe's Bus. This is a bus full of drinkers old and new, sober and not, and those who are somewhere in between.

We are all at different levels of sober so you can bet that one of us has walked in your shoes.

If you want advice and support then you're in the right place.

Come take a seat or just lurk, we're happy to have you along for the ride.

And here is a link to the last thread so you can catch up on the journey so far HERE

:)

tbh jemima not glad at all that you are going back to hospital, but very, very glad that you are getting the care that you need.

I so agreed with your previous posts about the NHS. I had my appendix out in an emergency operation a couple of years ago. I was 400 miles from home and all thanks to Luton and Dunstable hospital, they were amazing. Of course medically, but given the circumstances they were above and beyond the call of duty socially and practicaly.

Mouseface

No point in giving yourself a hard time - even stopping drinking completely isn't going to stop you fucking up in other areas so if you're going to feel bad every time you do something silly you've got a lot of feeling bad ahead of you!

You probably should stop drinking, at least one day at a time - because that is what is going to make you happiest in the long term. There really isn't any right or wrong in this process; it's all about being "virtuously selfish" (I just made that up) i.e. putting yourself first because it's the right thing to do and it makes you and everyone else around you happier.

Maybe later you will feel you want to drink again. And maybe you will be able to. But, for now, be nice to yourself; drop the guilt, and drop the drink that caused it.

Take care, happy as always to chat one-to-one if it helps.

S

" even stopping drinking completely isn't going to stop you fucking up in other areas so if you're going to feel bad every time you do something silly you've got a lot of feeling bad ahead of you!"

Because, of course, you are human; not because you fuck things up any more than anyone else!

Hi MIF apologies for my interruption on the other thread, just thought it was really crap that it was in 'most active' when a really supportive and helpful thread like this isn't . You're an argumentative devil btw, I'd not like to go head to head with you. Do you ever give up? Or is that just a venus-fly-trap appraoch to appear to give in, and then come back later and win

venus - i thought you gave us a right telling off! - im sorry for being naughty but it was too good an opportunity for a piss take for me to pass up! and yeah! the man is like a dog with a bone when you get him started!

how is everyone doing anyway? got your strategies ready for the evening?, dont leave it all too late - remember HALT (hungry, angry, lonely, tired), any one of those things can help that fucking voice get the better of you!

I can't imagine how tiring it would be to live with him

oh, i would proberbly nut him!

Sounds like you've been very busy recently JWN, is business doing better? And most importantly are you OK? I have assumed that your quick, 'busy busy' post are just to let us know that you're all right, not a deflection of us away from any of the pressures you're facing?

no venus, not a deflection at all!, i promise im absolutly fine drinking wise - tbh i am struggling a bit right now with the changes that being sober has bought - it feels like my whole life has been turned on its head, everything i thought was one way is now another, i have been taking it out a bit on dh, to my shame!, we will be fine but it has been a bit up and down iyswim? - like thurso im also getting used to the idea that my baby has left home, it has affected me far more than i could ever have predicted. - as to work, well tbh thats just as up and down as everything else, very similar for many right now i guess - i have been pretty busy with it but dh takes on the lions share so i suppose im lucky really!

saf, it was me! - i do feel sad about it but not in an overwhelming sense iyswim?, tbh, i think i didnt want another baby badly enough to do anything about my 'ishoos', i just look back now that its all far too late and think wistfully about what might have been, in a way, i think its 'safe' now for me to do that simply because it is far to late!

I went for a long walk with DH, the dog and Nemo this afternoon.

And then had a Bulmers and a glass of cava left over from DH's birthday celebrations last night. So a friend has worked that out as about 6 units today.

14 per week is the recommendation.

Now I'm going to bed with all of your kind words ringing in my ears. You are all amazingly Brave Babes*, regardless of the stage you are at in your quest for sobriety.

venus - you know me so well. You are spot on as usual. I felt and feel invincible of late. I can drink can't I? I'm 36.5 so I can do as I like...... not so mouse where drink is concerned. xx

MIF - thank you for the kind offer of talking one to one. I will think about what I need to let out and send you a PM so that we don't clog up this Bus! xx

IsinDe, MsGee and Obrigada - you are all so kind for keeping me going. I guess sometimes, we can all get sideswiped.

Off to bed now to stay out of the fridge. Sauv Blanc has been shouting my name all night.

Night Babes xx

ohhh mouse!! you dafty! im 47 and 3/4s and i still cant drink like as i would like to! get yourself to bed my lovley little mouse!

Thurso, yes I understood your post.
Started out with good intentions and bought fancy elderflower cordial but it tastes like drinking weak perfume so am disappointed. And two glasses of red down.
I just can't do this.

Does anyone know of any good meetings in the London Area? I have found that the 12 Steps help me to not drink and find friends who feel the same way. I am having problems finding a good meeting where they don't mind that I am extremely religious. Unfortunately all as I have found is people that act like spiritual bullies calling me names and making fun of me which is not good for my sobriety. I need help to maintain my sobriety. Online is OK for now.

swallowedAfly

Thank you I feel welcomed already. I think I ended up on the wrong thread before. I am looking for fellowship that understands me, or at least doesn't call me names and tell me I'm stupid. I need help to stay away from the bottle and find a good meeting. So far what I have found has been kind of rough around the edges.

Thats OK swallowedAfly, I understand, I'm just looking for help and friendship with stopping my drinking. It doesn't have to be in AA, there are many other options available, I just find that it works for me. I won't mention AA anymore unless somebody asks.

JR sorry I don't know about AA at all - this is my support group

SAF I know exactly what you mean and the longing for a second child is hard to squash isn't it? How old is DS? It sounds like you have worked out all the practical things - have you been drinking to sort out the drinking first or does it all go hand in hand? I know when I am pg, its not even an issue not to drink. I wish I could advise you, I can't even reconcile my own decisions but not doing it because you feel selfish or bad is a crap reason. (sorry - but it is!)

mouse ah, mousey. others will give you the tough love but I think you might need a hug and some cheese ((( ))) ..... (< crumbs of cheese) - there you go.

ma of course you can do it. you just didn't do it yesterday. try again today? And yes, elderflower cordial is shit. hot chocolate and a slab of cake is much better.

anyway, feeling more positive here. Had a lovely chat with DH last night and we have decided that although we are not ready to try again, we no longer want to say 'never ever' (mainly because of DD- she so wants a sibling). Thats as far as we have got. However, we agreed to continue getting rid of all the baby stuff because if anything happened it won't be for ages and we would want to start from scratch if that makes sense. Right now, being a family of 3 is Plan A, but we are no longer shutting the door on Plan B. I can't tell anyone in RL this because its too fraught - they will get excited and run away with what at the moment is the very seed of a thought.

Anyway, I got through last night by working till 9pm and drinking my alcohol free beer. I know that MIF would not approve but it works for me. I would never touch alcohol free wine though. That would not work!

Positive vibes to you all today. Today I will not be drinking.

SAF thinking to sort out the drinking ... sorry!!

also ... i am feeling proud of having 'the seed of a thought'. this is not normal MsGee. Normally I have an idea and run with it at a million miles per hour, I do not mull things over.

Is this some kind of personal growth?