The no contact/texting/email thread

[cathkidstonbag]

I know it can't just be me who is struggling with not contacting someone they shouldn't so wondered if anyone else would like to join in here and we can support each other?
I have a thread somewhere titled don't want to sleep with DH and my circumstances are on there. But basically I need to stop contacting a man who is making my life miserable. I emailed him on Sat ending all contact with a brilliant email and was so proud of myself :) He then replied and instead of it being horrible it was nice sweet charming and I replied back :( So cross with myself. In it I told him about something awful that had happened so expected at least some sympathy for that. I got nothing :(
I need to never contact him again. To be strong enough not to beg him for contact.
Anyone else needing support???

I'm here .

Right, what do you really, really want?

Carry on as you are = being his bit on the side with you having no control over what goes on and when he texts you.

You give another ultimatum but be prepared for him to chose his wife and it will either be over or it won't, ie carrying on as now.

You ignore his texts and just stop all contact. Let it fade away.

Decide you need closure and tell him you can't do this any more and it is over. Then make it so. Change your mobile and take some time off work to have a break.

FWIW I wanted closure but that didn't work. I can't handle sporadic contact and a few crumbs he has time to give me. We finished as he rang, had to go, I blocked him on my phone, then unblocked him and sent some messages. Nothing since. I wanted him to text me so I could ignore him and have the last word. Daft really.

And my hand isn't on you It was supposed to be hang and up the thread I DUMPED a boy, not JUMPED him .

Dessie12 - 2 1/2 weeks that's great :) Keep it up!!!
Blondie73 - so he wants the break but obviously can't manage it can he? Think you're going to have to be strong for both of you. Don't give in yet :)
And yes think DH beyond help. Right just spoken to counsellor friend of mine. She says he def not interested in me as OW anymore. He obv wants to be friends in a very casual way. And she says he obv never really cared for me that much and has no idea of depth of my feelings :S so now I feel even worse. I really don't think I want that kind of friendship so NC for me now. She doesn't think he'll notice/care :(

Heh heh FAB I knew what you meant!! so funny!!

OMG -

and I really really don't want to carry on as we have - so guess I will be trying to continue to ignore his texts.... think he will get the message now anyway as I never ignore them!

.

Fab you do indeed speak lots of sense. Right I'm going to take a break for a bit I think. I'm absolutely devastated to think I've been sobbing my heart out over somebody who felt nothing for me. I don't understand why he wants to be my friend if that's how it was. I feel sick to think of all the things I told him and the trust i placed in him. Will never understand any of this.
Felt so good at counsellors today, like I was really moving forward and in control. Turns out I had nothing to be in control of :(
Take care ladies, be tough those of you who are doing NC and get those men out of your minds!!!

You too OMG - I'm thinking of you, stay strong, and don't let yourself slide down any further - he's the loser NOT YOU! Hugs!

so hard when you are receiving texts all the time. I am a bit jealous...I'm the one fishing for texts .. such a loser...

Sorry Kiikii...didn't read your whole thread. You have a whole different thing going on. Neighbour is tricky. But I know how it feels after a long marriage with no love.

Let me tell you that you must contemplate the consequences. I succumbed and my life has been ripped apart. I'm actually glad of the change, although scary, but wow...things never stay the same.

Be careful...think carefully

nothing again today - i dont want to give in ,i just want him to feel the same as i do
in the past he has told me that we are soulmates and i agree ,we get each other ,i do think in the future we will be together but while i wait its hard

Just because someone texts you, it doesn't mean you have to read or reply. You can do this. You are strong people.

I dreamt about my ex last night and he wanted me and we were together. No drama, nothing just calmness that we were where we were meant to be. WTF? . No desire to contact him, not that I can but I don't want too. It is great to be where I am and you can all be there with me.

Day 3...still here.

FAB, you gave me excellent advice more than a year ago..clearly I didn't take it! But I am now. Thank you so much.

Headinclouds - have no idea who people are when they name change but I hope you are okay.

HELP HELP HELP! On the verge of calling....(brief story: I've been an idiot chasing him like a fool and I'm just another notch to him...well maybe a bit more...but) Tell me I shouldn't. I have massive news...am moving towns with work...feel it is churlish not to call. He called me last but over a week ago. HELP!!!

Holding off...give me strength...or should I? Is this too hard or what? I keep thinking it's rude not to tell him...after how he's treated me...but you know what it's like...tell me to stop!!!!!

Hi Fizz - have you signed up to the Baggage Reclaim daily emails? The ones on staying on track with NC? they're great at times like this! Basically if you're serious about no contact..... don't do it!!! I know its hard...... :(

Stop.