The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Spring Into Summer.

[Mouseface]

Hello

Welcome to The Brave Babes Battle Bus.

This is a quest full of Babes, all fighting to remain sober, cut down or are somewhere in between right now.

You ticket to travel is free, it won't expire, and the Bus will always be here, even if there are days when you are not. So come say hi.

I'm Mouse. I have a thing for cheese and vodka, not together, well, not always!

Here is a LINK to the last thread, where you can read all of the previous threads and the journeys so far.

thornrose take it an hour at a time.
How about a nice bubble bath, I find that always helps (and I cannot get to the shops when in the bath .
Some chocolate, cuppa, nice cordial.
Go outside and scream.
Book, or movie

Just don't project, keep it in the now, and slowly you will get through this evening, and tomorrow you will feel so proud of yourself for not succumbing.

You CAN DO THIS

And keep chatting here if you want, I am about for the next half hour or so.

Thorn - eight days is incredible - well done!

I have had a few 'thoughts' today too - but am ignoring them. It's normal to have them - you just need to ignore them - like an unwelcome visitor knocking on the door - you don't have to open it! I am off out to my singing group shortly -great natural high!

Meanwhile keep on chatting on here, follow some of bafana's excellent suggestions - I would definitely avoid going to the shop. If you would like to 'buddy up with me in this just send me a PM!

Ok, I'm back on track. I got busy, did some paperwork, had dinner. Not drinking makes me so much more productive I notice! Once I'd had that first glass of wine I didn't do anything useful!
Sorry for whittering on but it helps.

Well done Rose that is a real victory to chalk up, and one that will give you strength for a future trial. Keep on keeping on.

Well done Rose

Yes, it is amazing how much more productive you can be! My house is much tidier. I used to think that I would do things after the first glass of wine, but all I ever managed to achieve after the first glass, was the ability to polish off 2 bottles .

Thanks ladies, I am quietly proud of not falling at the first "proper" hurdle!
As well as being more productive I'm starting to take better care of myself. Washing, drying and straightening my hair in the evening instead of washing and leaving it so I can get on with drinking.
I made an appointment at the dentist, I haven't been for years (my teeth and gums are in good shape luckily.)

I saved myself approx £500 tonight by sorting out car insurance (2 cars), before I would have been too busy drinking to devote the time to shopping around. I can't believe what an idiot I have been, time and opportunities lost to the drink over the years.

But I have a quandary I would like you - who understand - to help me with. I think I started drinking many years ago because I was shy, nervous and anxious in social situations. I have used wine to help me over that and have managed to socialise with that (ever increasing) prop. Without the prop I am finding it difficult - fine with my near and dear friends, but DH is a 'joiner' and loves to attend socials with each new group he joins. I just find it so hard to go to these dos where I don't know anyone in a sober state. He gets upset and cross if I don't want to go. Any ideas of how I can get through this social phobia sober?
Thanks
X

thornrose, I have been feeling a lot like you tonight. Perhaps for me it's because it's almost the weekend, my time to drink.
Have been in my pj's since 6pm and am going to have an early night. It's day 7 for me.

Stay strong. Sometimes for me it's one minute at a time.

Mouse, hope you're ok. Ditto "Golly, Ma, qo* and any other babes who are feeling down and a bit wobbly.

Yep BB - just tell him you're not going. end of. and let him sulk. sorted x

Thanks Silver I am inclined to do that but it just makes me look like an old misery in his eyes. He is not very deep and doesn't seem to understand that I have medicating myself through these occaisions for years.

It's a very long time ago, but I can remember the first occasion I decided to drink to take the edge off my nerves. I had made a complete idiot of myself by shaking like a leaf at my first student party, so decided to have drink or 2 to 'relax' myself before I went to the next one. Downhill all the way for the next 3 decades...

Hi gals. off to bed in a mo. Managed to jog 5K and 38 minutes tonight so am pleased and only had one glass of wine. Thurso DH is still trying very hard and strongly believes it can all be made ok again. me? meh.
DD2 has her Higher english exam tomorrow and is very stressed and down. She is getting persistent headaches, despite having new glasses and taking Migraleve. She is not particularly academic - she is very musical instead - so this is a real pressure test for her.
Bwanna can't really help with the social thing as my drinking tends to be more at home and solitary but keep at it. I amsure someone will be along who can help.

Thanks Ma exam fever is horrible for everyone, if she can manage it, can you treat her toa special breakfast in the morning? It will be brainfood for her and you will feel as if you are doing something to help. Well impressed with your running. PM me your sponsor link please.
X

PS I did the home, lone, drinking as well of course. Not planning to go back to it, but having to learn to live with the new sober me I guess, and some things are not cured by sobriety.

Hi all, I keep joining these threads just as they expire, so this is me just hopping on board.

Obviously not drinking, so am mostly lurking, but trying to build up a set of preventative strategies ahead of Temptation Day.

Morning all!!

Hi tortoise welcome(back?) to the bus!

ma thanks but the zoo are going to post the purse back, in all my crossness at the school I forgot to ask if the cash was even still inside it, so we wont know till it lands!

I'll be about later on - hoping to get somemore of the garden done today my new garden fyrniture is coming on monday!! Hope everyone has a good day :) x

P.S. Dare I mention that it's Friday the 13th? woooooooo

Day 7 Today I will not drink - no matter what!

Rose well done

I've also been amazed how much more organised and efficient I am sober. It's good to feel back in control of my life. Being able to plan simple things - and yes -save money!

BB The social thing is really hard. In my previous long stretches off the sauce I discovered I ( that is the real me not the alc-distorted version) didn't really enjoy the loud parties and frantic socialising at all, ( that was why I felt nervous and anxious - it wasn't that there was anything wrong with me - many people don't like this sort of thing I realised) ) so early on I avoided those occasions like the plague. I even asked my then dp not to drink in the housefor quite a while. It took about 3 months till it felt OK.

But he was very supportive of my not drinking. I think you are going to have to have a talk with your dh at some point , choosing your time carefully and when you are feeling confident. It's not mandatory to be a social butterfly, nor to enjoy all the same things in the same way as your dh does. Maybe think of some things you both enjoy that you can do as a couple instead?

Then when I did go to one of these occasions I always made sure I had 1. a quick answer for anyone who asked why I wasn't drinking ( actually most people don't care or notice) and 2. an escape plan and your own transport home - you can always make an excuse and leave early if it gets too much and 3. If you think you might feel deprived, and there won't be many non alc options, take along a bottle of your favourite soft drink.( I'm loving the bottle green cordials at the moment - the pomegranate is lovely, and the elderflower)

In time, I developed my own interests and activities that didn't revolve around drinking - that helps too. (Cooking, Walking with the dogs, going to the gym, and joining a community choir where mine - sounds terribly old-fartish but that's just me - paragliding and skydiving would do the same thing!

I am so enjoying returning to these with a clear head and plenty of energy.

Have a lovely day everyone.

4c
x

Welcome tortoise! What has brought you here, and what are your aims? Its a really fantastic place, even if like me you're a lazy lurker!

I'm wary about sharing the following in case it puts anyone off AA, but read to the end!

I'm 16 months sober now and go to 2-3 meetings a week. I go because it works, because its good to be with people who 'get' me and I find it a safe and relaxing place to recharge every couple of days.

I had a work meeting cancelled unexpectedly yesterday so went to a meeting I rarely go to. I came away feeling a bit 'AA'ed out, there was some random and negative sharing and I suddenly felt, 'Enough! I'm sober, I know what to do to stay sober, why do I have to spend all this time working it.'

Later that night I took a call from a friend, not an Alcoholic, who was beside herself about something that might not happen, but if it did could be stressful. She was incoherent, panicked and unable to think straight.

I had a lightbulb moment. Until I stopped drinking EVERYTHING was a drama, now there is excitement in my life but not chaos, and I never have that churning, headless chicken panic that characterised my pre sober days.

Even if I didn't drink on a problem (and there weren't many situations that didn't lead to a messy and self indulgent bender) I could not process it. And now I can with complete clarity. I have not come across a situation that I cannot apply the Serenity Prayer to.

If something happens I can either do something about it, or I can't and I can accept the situations that are outwith my control. If I can't think what the solution is I can meditate (pray) about it or call my sponsor or talk about it at a meeting.

Theres an oft quoted saw in AA that until you get it is just one more bit of irritating jargon, but for me is probably the main reason I go to meetings - I came for my drinking and stayed for my thinking.

I do recognise that I have been lucky in my sobriety and haven't had any big challenges since I stopped drinking, but its chicken and egg- lots of things haven't happened because I didn't cause them, and I'm getting better and better with dealing with situations the more I work the programme.

4c4good great practical advice!

morning all!

QO - i have to ask, who swapped that depressed miserable person for the bright shiny qo who orders new garden furniture? - i love reading your posts, they take me right back to when i first stopped drinking, that first week or so of agony and then the feeling of the clouds lifting and the first thoughts that maybe it would be alright afterall and that i might have a good life ahead of me!

BB, i am a social butterfly, i would die without having people around me and i love meeting new people, i still have a churny tummy though as i walk into a room! - i think its worth remembering that most people do, it can be daunting even for the ones who look at ease!, i would advise you homing in on the 'socially at ease' ones at a gathering, they are the ones most likely to talk to you, direct your questions at that person, let them take the lead in a conversation and just gradually add your twopence!, ime it works, most of us 'loud' people can recognise when someone is shy and are more than happy to and put them at ease!

another thing worth saying to husband is that a room full of drunk people is a very boring evening for you, get him to stay sober one evening so that he can see what you mean!, perhaps you need to find an interest you can both enjoy!

btw, helpmenow - thats a great post!, i too question why im there sometimes, i usually realise a few hours later!

HI everyone. Sorry not posted for ages. Been really stressed recently and drinking although not too much and I have managed a couple of days without anything recently.

Hope Nemo is OK *Mouse, and your DD
How are things with your DD Golly sounds like things have been tough
Indie can't believe the DT's are crawling, I keep thinking of them as being tiny babies still

Hi to everyone I've missed

Hey Zany, great to hear from you, sorry to hear you have been stressed, how is the romance going?