Morning WUM: Have just caught up with your latest news. You are doing well and are so resiliant.
I can only echo the teenage selfish stuff: my two girls are wonderful, and have been incredibly supportive of me, but they still have unreasonable demands. I can remember taking 16 yr old out with a firm budget in mind for her prom dress a couple of weeks ago. After looking (me) at clothes within her budget, with her ignoring/sneering at all my suggestions, she insisted we look at a designer shop, where she swooped on a Viv Westwood little dress (honestly they had a copy in Top Shop which she had earlier turned her nose up at for a tenth of the price), which was £700!! She then had the biggest strop and hissy fit imaginable in this posh boutique! She then sulked and stropped around all day, left me in town, and got the bus home, where she phoned all her friends to tell them about her tightwad mother. I got in later, and she had a good old rant again. So I told her to phone Childline! Honestly hun, the moral of my rather longwinded tale, is that they all do this - my friend teaches year 11, and she says that they all think the world revolves around them, and can only see things from their own perspective.
My girls are supporting me amazingly well at the moment, but there is still the other, normal teenage side to them. Your daughter is no different.
If I was you, for what it's worth, I would: step back a bit from daughter, don't justify your reasons. She knows about the money, she knows she can't go to the academy, because bottom line, it's too much money. The academy is to her what that daft dress was to my daughter. She can't have it - simples. Quietly reiterate your reasons why, without further explanation. The Chelsea trial thing you have suggested (Chelsea - yuk, btw!!) probably appeals, but she's aiming for the full prize. Don't suggest this again, leave it with her. When she realises the academy is not going to happen (and if you don't discuss this with her further, then she will realise this quickly), she will then think about the compromise.
Remember the Rugrats? They all have a bit of Angelica in them! Remember when she said to Chucky, "If you want a kitten, ask for a pony?" Your girl (and mine) needs to know the pony isn't on offer - so it's Top Shop for mine, and weekend compromise for yours!! Stick to your guns.
I hope you don't mind me saying this, but perhaps you are over-compensating to your daughter because you feel bad on her behalf about the break up?? Please don't. None of this is your doing. I feel I want to spoil my kids rotten at the moment, it's a natural thing.
H isn't signing/returning papers because he sounds a total control freak. Let the solicitors earn their money and sort that all out.
Take care X