The Brave Babes Carry On Past The Easter Booze Offers.

[NotTheMessiahJustMouseface]

Hello,

I'm Mouse, well, I am usually!

Welcome to the Brave Babes Bus.

This is a journey of sobriety, started almost a year ago by the wonderful jesuswhatnext. So why not come aboard and find a seat. There's heaps of support on here whether you are sober, drinking or somewhere in the middle.

And, for those of you who want a bit of history, here are the Previous Threads

qo - three days you say? In three days what could you do? Spruce up DD's room for her for when she gets back?

Or your room, the lounge?

Re-arrange the house a little, open it all up. De-clutter that one last room (assuming you have one, I do! )

Why not go for a walk one afternoon. Just you. Do you have a park nearby or a green space?

Maybe just go and clear the cobwebs. And yes, I hope your new book comes too.

It's so nice to see a whole new you xx

Morning ladies

I need your support ( have namechanged). I've had lengthy periods of sobriety - longest was five years until I caved a year ago. Things have been getting steadily worse, needless to say - and I must stop. I'm undermining my health, getting into embarassing situations, performing less than optimally at work, and wasting money.

Am going to re-join my online support group (women for sobriety - it's fantastic and really helped) and I need support here too.

Will you help me in my commitment? Day 2 today - hurrah :)

Am off out to take all the empty bottles to the tip. Am too ashamed to put them all out for recycling. No booze in the house. Then I am meeting a friend for a dog walk.

Welcome 4c4good. This is a great place for support. It's my first sober weekend in quite a while. I can relate to everything you say.
Why did you restart drinking? Has there been a trigger. 5 years! Wow. Ok you caved in but that in itself is a hell of an achievement.
Looking forward to getting to know you better.

Luci X

Welcome 4c4

Agree with luci - 5 years is amazing! Enjoy your walk, and yes, be nice to see more off you.

luci - well done on a sober weekend! How do you feel about that? Weekends were always my wobbling days.

'of'

Hi all

Have supposed to come online to do some work while DH has the children, so will be brief.

Welcome C4Cgood!

Mouse, how are you today?

Qo, I hope your DD gets away ok and second what Mouse says about making plans to make the most of the time while she's away.

Hope all are well x

4c4good

hello!

welcome 4c4!, pleased to meet you! , anyone who can claim 5 years of sobriety gets my respect! i hope you find what you need on here to get you back on track!

NOW! please let me rant! DH IS DOING MY FUCKING HEAD IN!, HE IS A ARSEHOLE OF THE HIGHEST FUCKING ORDER AND RIGHT NOW I COULD SMASH HIS STUPID SULKY ARSEHOLE FUCKWIT NUMPTY ARSEHOLE MUSH RIGHT IN!

whew!, and breathe! - god i feel better for that!, we have been to da! da! da!.... homebase! we have jobs that need doing and need doing this weekend and he has sulked and stroped and thrown himself about like kevin the teenager - NO, i dont want to do the jobs either but if we dont the kitchen sink will overflow and various other things will fall apart! he is even being a bloody martyr about getting the car washed, now he has decided he needs to do it himself cos the 'bloody albanians dont know about paintwork'! aaaggghhhh!!

thank you ladies for your paitience and understanding! i wont smash his bloody sulky mush in but i might find a lovley big puddle and drive the clean car through it! he might then understand how i feel when i have scrubbed the fucking bathroom and then he has a shave!

thank god for the brave babes!, you help me keep what sanity i have left!

To those who've asked (Mouse and Indie), I am looking forward to a Monday morning without a throbbing hangover and worse still, the shame and guilt of f**king it all up again.
TBH it has been helped by the fact that we simply cannot afford alcohol. DP has been fine about it. He only ever has 2/3 cans of beers over the weekend.
I however...well I have spoken before about blackouts, forgotten conversations, scaring my tiny daughters with my "mad" behaviour, not knowing why I'm in a certain bedroom and making DP sad and worried.
I am looking forward to NOT starting yet another week with regret.

I have to confess though that this weekend has been fucking tough, mentally more than physically as I have missed my "excuse" to forget the boredom, stress and worry of my life in a haze of alcohol. I am living my life dry and sober and for now it's hard.
I know (of course) that getting hammered will not solve our money worries and as a direct result, relationship worries, nor will it make my DD2 (2.8 yrs) start talking properly but for a few hours every weekend I could "not give a toss" about it all.

Luci

I hope this doesn't come across as patronising, but I just wanted to say well done and don't beat yourself up about wanting that escape. You haven't given in, and that's a massive achievement.

It's been a long time since I've faced up to problems without booze to make it all go away (whatever "it" is, and notwithstanding that of course it doesn't go away at all) and when I hear people just getting on with it and through it, it reinforces that hope that it is possible to live sober - hard as it is.

Hang on in there.

Thanks talldrink. I have literally been "hanging in there" for the whole of my weekend. It's so tough. I feel I'm always just a second away from thinking "fuck it! I'll get some wine."
We have 2 corner shops less than 5 minutes walk away which stay open till 11pm so the tempation is always there.
I am not giving in this time. I just wish the evil alcohol fairy whispering in my ear and telling me to go and have a drink would piss off.

That constant, constant craving is so hard, especially when by the sounds of it you have a lot of other chatter going round and round inside your head and you just want some oblivion. One second at a time. Can you have a very early bathtime and sit down to watch a film together with your DDs and some popcorn (Sinbad's on Channel 5 at five) just to try to get through the rest of the afternoon and early evening?

Must go, poor DH is refereering what sounds like WW3 in the garden and if I don't finish this work I'll have to do it tonight instead of the ironing (now there's an incentive). Sending you hanging-on-in-there vibes.

JWN !

Hello l-l-l-ladies

Personally, I've found that the longer I've been sober, the less bored and boring I am which is entirely the opposite to what I was expecting. I'm thinking straighter which makes proper conversations with people easier and more interesting and I'm getting loads more done (no more sofa loafing all the live long day) which makes my life a whole lot more interesting.

Went to a fab meeting last night, a massive (100ish) people speaker meeting. The first bloke talking was so funny, oh and before that the woman reading out Ch5 was hilarious, she was incredibly nervous and stumbled her way through it, interspersing reading with huffs, puffs and hysterical laughter. She got a round of applause when she got to the end It was one of the funniest things I've seen in ages!

Sorry, haven't read back to when I last posted, hope you're all well!

Thank you "Isinde*. The thought of feeling resentful, pissed off and craving a drink for the rest of my life is seriously depressing.
Wishing us both love, patience and mostly strength.
Off to push the girls in the swing in the garden.
An activity usually performed half cut on a Sunday.

Luci

You're doing incredibly well to not have had a drink all weekend when the craving has been there - don't be so hard on yourself. The resentment and craving doesn't have to always be there. Sorry, I don't know your back story so I don't know if you've tried AA but one of the things that keeps me going back regularly are the stories the established members tell me of having no desire to drink at all. That's what I'm striving for at the moment. I want what they've got.

It's funny you know, since I started going to AA meetings I've started to see evidence of AA all over the place. For instance - a story in the paper about a shop who had received a letter from someone who had stolen something trivial years earlier and wanted to apologise and pay them back, it was pretty obvious to me that the person was doing an amend. Also this morning on desert island discs - the woman spoke about having not drank for twenty years, she didn't mention AA at all but she did use a lot of AA language.

I guess it's like when you're pregnant (or want to be) and you see pregnant women everywhere.

luci - the very fact that you have remained sober so far, and will continue to is a huge improvement. Not to be patronising but seeing you post at a weekend and sober is lovely.

It's not easy, no way! Weekends are for drinking, for getting wasted because you have no work for 2 days etc......... or, they're for enjoying your family, doing stuff, just being you and remembering your days and nights. I'm glad you have got this far. And even though you've had to fight every second of the day not to pick up, you'll be a better person for it and you know that lovely, keep going!

Dinner, bath, book and bed for you later xx

tall - I'm good, keep rushing out to do a few jobs in the garden before Noah arrives in his arc to save me from the rain!

Been a really good weekend of getting things done and we're having more work on the house tomorrow. Eeek! Needs must though.

JWN - Ahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa at you wanting to kill DH. Oh my days, that is the funniest rant I've read in ages

Golly - I know exactly what you mean about seeing pregnant ladies everywhere when you want to be too! It's the same with anything. You know that you shouldn't/can't have something, you want it all the more.

I always get that 'it's not fair' feeling. And then remember MIFLAW telling me that if life was fair, he wouldn't be here. So I pull my pants up and get on with it!

How are things with your DD?

Hello lovelies,

no wi fi, at the hotel, so very lovely to be back to hear from you all.

Hello 4C4good, glad to meet you.
Luci good to hear from you, you were here when I first came on, give the "evil fairy" the "evil eye"!
Mousiemouseface I hope you're feeling better, and that the pain has lessened.
Venus I hope that the "life" things getting in the way of your keyboard are all good. When does DD get home?
Ma how was the sleepover? A gentler waking up than usual perhaps?
Silver what's occurring

Crikey, sorry I'm namechecking like the proverbial Oscar winner as someone on here once said, so I hope everyone has had a good weekend.

We had a lovely room in the hotel, only marred by great expectations! (not me), I did explain that thinking about a houseful (in my house) of hormones raging teenagers, and buckets of booze (my fault) wasn't conducive to fab relaxing sex (what would they be doing?!), and we spent lat(ish) Saturday night watching a docurama about Hattie Jaques!!!

we got home at about 11.30am to find......DC2 had walked his friends to the station, the dishwasher was on, all the beds made, and not a burn, or mess anywhere!!!! WHAT'S THE WORLD COMING TO . Half the booze we bought was still in the ice buckets, including three bottles of major champers, and there was evidence of a sing song , guitars lying about, and sheet music and lyrics!

Sorry, being facetious, I actually was very worried, and count myself very lucky that they all had a lovely time, in a good way. I have already had messages saying "thanks for the lovely evening, hope you had a good time too" .. again!

Time to hang more washing out, they say it's going to be sunny tomorrow, speak later chaps.

xxxxxx

evening babes. Afraid to say I have relapsed a bit . Not massively, just had a couple of g and t's last night. I have to say, I really enjoyed them! I know that's a very bad thing to admit to, but I did. I think I'm rebelling against what the aa 'primary purpose' lot were saying and wanted to prove that I'd be ok...I felt a bit woolly this morning but I'm not craving for more so we;ll see. Welcome 4c4 Not a great first post from me for you to see - sorry

oops, didn't mean to post yet. I have still had a great weekend - been with the kids and we all as a family went swimming today, so all is not yet lost!

Hi Mouse

Things with DD are ok (at home). She's still refusing school a fair bit (managed one day out of three last week ) and is having some tricky friendship problems where people are excluding her from things they're doing but on the whole she's been quite pleasant to be around. She actually came home from what was supposed to be an all night camp out last night because the rest of the group got horribly pissed and one of them puked on her tent . She'd had a couple of drinks but she wasn't pissed and I'm really proud of her for calling and asking to be collected rather than joining them in a booze fest.

I told her about AA last week! . I had spoken to my family therapist alone about it and she said honesty was the key and perhaps I could just tell her I was attending a support group rather than giving it a name but the moment I told her she asked if it was AA - don't know how she even knows about AA! But it's all good, she said she was very proud of me and gave me a hug (rarity for her).