Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dumpling no more? Only the strong survive and we did no. 4

915 replies

IfYoureHappyAndYouKnowIt · 09/04/2011 09:17

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without him by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong

This thread is for ex dumplings. Any dumpling that feels like she has "mostly" moved past crisis into an "almost" sorted state can post and chat here as we continue our quest for serenity with a lot of laughs along the way and support Grin

OP posts:
romneymarsh · 18/05/2011 22:30

Good evening, just got back from work. I watched a policeman drop two ducklings back in the river, when I asked where their mum was he pointed to two mallards, I pointed this out and he said oh dear. I then proceeded to try and catch them again, I managed one and the other one wouldnt come close enough for me to get, anyway we got one of the guys in water rescue gear and got him in the river, (I had spoken to a friend who works for Tiggywinkles wildlife rescue who had advised me that a mother duck never leaves her babies and would die if we didnt get them) anyway another two babies appear and we ended up rescuing 5 in total and off to tiggywinkles to be looked after.

Im on fb can you PM me your names so I can add you and also the Dumplings one.

Googoo please delete him, you will think on this meeting again and eventually give in like you did last time, Im not saying I wouldnt do any different but I know how it would affect me. He will carry on messing with you all the time he is your friend.

startingovernow · 18/05/2011 22:53

Goo, glad you're feeling better about exbf & yes will say it again delete him!! Ah that sounds really positive on the work front, well done. God that's so weird that Drummerman & exbf are playing a gig together!! How freaky is that!! I wouldn't tell Drummerman for now if it were me.

Someday, yes birthdays are v hard to begin with but do get easier, I take no notice now Smile

Patience, well done for mastering FB !! Think I will have to reactivate my account to catch up with my dumpling friends Smile.

Waves to Getting & Pink (where are you?? Hope you're well)

Mumfun, any news on the job front?? Hope you're keeping well ((Hugs))

Waves to Happy, Sov, Tea, & anyone I'm forgetting......

Maybee, I lived in Rome Smile. Know what you mean about an Italian though, I'll always be attracted to their dark looks Smile & find the way they speak english to be v sexy ! Go on, hit the dating scene lol......

googoomama · 18/05/2011 23:12

Romney - I love the snapshots of your life - it all sounds so interesting!
Someday - agree with starting about birthdays - they get easier as you learn to enjoy yourself more and develop a little network of friends post split. My advice woudl be to take up any social offers that you get. It was very scary for me at first to venture out alone but since my divorce I've met some wonderful friends :)
Hi Starting! x
Patience - I'm bored with him too actually. He's a shit. Keep reminding me will you cos when he starts on the romantic songs I'm a very weak woman. Mind you, not so weak that I would ever be his "fuckng booty call" as the young teacher in my English department told me yesterday!

somedayillbesaturdaynite · 19/05/2011 00:40

Thank you all I feel very comforted being a part of this thread (even as quite a newbie Wink ), it's only the 2nd birthday since and that 1st once was a few days before I had to testify against him in court so my head was definitely not in a great place this time last year. I think the milestones do help us to see how far we've come and how much stronger we are for everything we've had happen.
I have pm'd some of you who have mentioned being on fb in recent posts as I am much more often on there but if i have forgotten anyone let me know.
waving to everyone and well done Hmm lol for seeing it through another day :)

soverign21 · 20/05/2011 15:47

Hey everyone

Anyone got plans for the weekend? it supposed to be a mini heatwave here so think a trip to the park and along the river at somepoint will be fun

Everything good here, am enjoying NM, possibly a little too much Wink lol

Hope everyone else doing ok xx

IfYoureHappyAndYouKnowIt · 20/05/2011 17:53

Glad you are enjoying NM.

Has everyone run away to fb?

I am planning a bit of sport, a meet up with old friends and some guitar practice Wink

OP posts:
googoomama · 20/05/2011 17:55

bloody football again 9.30. Followed by mum's house, followed by weekend on my own with two fighting boys

Patienceobtainsallthings · 20/05/2011 19:37

Just bring them up here googs x

soverign21 · 20/05/2011 19:52

know the feeling about fighting boys goog, i got 3 of them, am thinking stun guns and cs gas when they get too big for me to pull apart lol x

googoomama · 20/05/2011 20:01

glad it's not just me Sov! And Patience - we will come up one weekend in summer - it's just the worst time at the moment- right in the middle of 160 reports nad 160 English papers - got to do it all in 3 weeks - that's how long we're given. On top of all the usual planning, marking and other shit. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy my job but it's all exhausting at the moment. Been off my ADs too, which I don't think helps - and have had really bad PMT. Also, a friend of mine is going through terrible, terrible things at the moment and I'm trying to support her too. Ah, just life eh? Feeling down today - think it's just tiredness and hormones. Also completely paranoid about internet and privacy - got it in my head that DB knows I've put a clip up on here. Now I know that this is a side effect of coming off the ADs - I get very very paranoid when I'm down.

Patienceobtainsallthings · 20/05/2011 20:04

Get it taken off googs 4 peace in ur head .

googoomama · 20/05/2011 20:05

Exbf and DB are playing a gig together tonight. Then exbf is coming to my town tomorrow night - it will be so weird knowing that he is here and yet not here IYSWIM. He wants to meet at half term - one week's time - at least he's messaging me organising it but TBH I don't think he wants to. What he really wants is to come round here on the QT tomorrow night but I've said no and so he has to pretend that he wants to meet me as friends in 2 weeks, when he doesn't really, he just wants a quick .
3 years since my divorce. Since then I've met noone who has loved me. Just met men who have used me and I've let them. And I am more hard-hearted and cynical than I was but I still see the good in people and then feel really bad when it turns out the people I loved didn't love or even respect me

Patienceobtainsallthings · 20/05/2011 20:10

Does anyone know how to put photos on a memory stick from a laptop ?

startingovernow · 20/05/2011 20:13

Well ladies I've been on a further two coffee dates since I last posted!! Both were v nice & think I'll probably stay friends with one but sadly I didn't find either of them attractive. One of them was this afternoon, his wife had left him for someone else & it was obvious that he's gone though hell. Oh God he started to say his faith had been restored since meeting me & maybe the reason his marriage had broke up was that he would meet someone like me!!

Just barely avoided choking on my coffee!! I couldn't break it to him there & then that it wasn't happening for me so told him we'd see. Have already had a text asking for a 2nd date. Not sure I can do this anymore!! Am meeting all the wrong men & I'm too soft & hate upsetting them. Ended up feeling really sad & upset after date. We'd met in a hotel around the corner from Norm's house (man I was dating for 5mts for newbies), & I couldn't resist driving past his house in my desolate state!

Well you won't believe this but when I came home I found an email from Norm Shock. He wouldn't have seen me & email was sent before I'd even gone on date but isn't that a huge coincidence?? Not sure what to make of it all Hmm

googoomama · 20/05/2011 20:20

I think from his fb status he might have already seen it but I've reported my post (is that what you do?) and asked for it to be removed for personal reasons. Does anyone know if when you post things on youtube, as in you have a user name and post things - you can see if anyone has copied them to somewhere? Oh, Lord - I'm too tired to even care I think :(

startingovernow · 20/05/2011 20:27

Goo, sending you virtual hugs, sounds like you've a lot on your plate atm. Exbf is only messing with your head, if you can muster up the courage block him from fb & block his texts too. It might cause you some initial pain but will help you to move on. I understand that sad feeling & tis shite ((Hugs)), this too shall pass Smile. I agree with Patience get the link to DB deleted for your own peace of mind.

Patience, the way I do it (but I'm not v techy) is that I put in memory stick, right click on photo I want to transfer & then select option to save to memory stick

Someday, I've had to testify against my xh too & still have cases pending for next mt so I empathise with you over going through this too.

startingovernow · 20/05/2011 20:31

Goo, I'm not the most techy but I don't think there's anyway that he could have seen that you did link. To ans your other ques yes you can have link deleted by pressing the report button. What has he said on FB that makes you think he saw link??

Patienceobtainsallthings · 20/05/2011 20:38

Xp b4 googs ,re cynical etc .then I write about downloading pics.
I just don't trust fb.so if I dont make anyone a friend dont be offended ,its just my non trust of the complete human race in general ,rather like my anonimity on here.

Patienceobtainsallthings · 20/05/2011 20:43

I rather like my anonanimity on here,
That should read
,googs spelling please,too many late nights Blush

googoomama · 20/05/2011 20:57

Thanks Starting - he just put better to talk to people than talk about them. Sure it wasn't about me - afterall he has a whole life and millions of friends! How weird that Norm would email after you had been down his street! I remember coming back from a date with CDman and crying buckets about exbf, cos I realised that I just didn't have the spark with CDman and it made me miss exbf.
Patience - I'm too trusting and naive I think. Anonymity I think x
Mixture of lack of ADs, exbf fecking with my head, extreme tiredness due to work and 2 boys who keep haivng broken nights

Mumfun · 20/05/2011 21:34

HI all

Goo be careful of yourself and coming off ADs - should be in conjunction with your dr (()) about 3 years since divorce. It is hard - but you do have people who love you so keep to your new year mantra ! :) Sorry you are so pushed too and hope you can gte it all done smoothly

:) for Sov -glad things good

Starting -whoa re email from Norm and being in his neighbourhood. Glad one date nice but sorry there was some upset too.

Tea - good to do a FB group

Someday - hi :)
ROmney -also like your updates :)

Patience good to get yourself on FB - you can completely hide on there if you want to :) Or use a different name!

Things very challenging here but surprisingly ok.

Did not get job - sadly but not surprised as had heard rumours of further interviews I didnt get :(

Not good issue has happened with second child.

Further health issues for me.

But have party this weekend thank goodness. And am going to see Prince in a few weeks :)

googoomama · 20/05/2011 21:43

Hi Mumfun - so sorry you didn't get the job and that you have further health issues :(
I really hope things with your second DC are ok x
Very jealous of Prince concert - I love him and the reviews for the shows he played on US recently were absolutely amazing. Apparently he did a quite short set, then some people left cos they thought it was over and half an hour later he came back on and played a stonking set of all his old songs!
Thinking of going to see Dolly Parton in November. Also thinking of going to Ibitha just for a weekend in September. Like me, she just wants to go to see what it's like before she hits 40! So think I might just go and see the sunrise at Cafe del Mar. Long, long ago before I was a mum and a teacher, in what seems like another life, I worked in the record industry in London and I was in a band. Might just relive that for one weekend!
Party sounds good. I think I'm going to throw a summer party. Everyone invited if they can get to northumberland! x

googoomama · 20/05/2011 21:43

Romney - you're beautiful btw x

Patienceobtainsallthings · 20/05/2011 22:01

Were u the singer googs ,maybe we should form a band .don't matter what age ur for ibiza ,just wear at least 2 condoms when ur shagging xxxx

Maybee · 20/05/2011 22:20

Hello everyone,
Just a quick hello have been emailing my solicitor in scotland with more niggly wearisome stuff that has arisen. Jaysus it never ends does it? You get to a wee calm plateau and something just turns up again and goes - ha deal with this one! Anyway I must be getting callous as i don't even get butterflies when a new issue shows up i just get exhausted. Upwards and onwards the sun will rise in the morning and one day everything will fall into place. I have met lots of friendly people since I moved back so that is something. Will eventually have a good social life I think.
Mumfun I'm glad you're dealing with your challenges it doesn't sound easy for you at the moment. Enjoy your party this weekend and look forward to Prince that'll be fab.
Googs you look after yourself and try and rest a bit at the weekend. Give yourself some tlc.
Starting it must be fun having coffee dates I live in quite a small town and don't get out much and am always a bit tired at the end of the day so not sure how i would meet or manage a date yet. The first time i split with x i was in glasgow and eventually did speed dating and online dating. i dated a few drippy guys and talked myself into a relationship with one for a few months who was another kind of asshole, however I do believe that he was the catalyst that drove me back to x in the first place! As i never came close to the kind of connection we had with anyone else. Looking back as a wiser woman now i realise that our connection had a lot to do with pretence anyway and i'd run a mile from any shoddy behaviour now. Though i will clear my head a bit for a while.
Enjoy the weekend. :)